Because of these unfair expectations, women find themselves in "damned if they do" and "doomed if they don't" situations.
由于这些不公平的期待,女性发现自己处于“如果做就会烦恼”和“不做注定会更糟”的两难境地。
This is especially true when it comes to negotiations concerning compensation, benefits, titles, and other perks.
当涉及有关补偿金、福利、职位和其他特殊待遇的谈判时尤其如此。
By and large, men negotiate more than women.
总的来说,男人谈判的结果比女人好。
A study that looked at the starting salaries of students graduating with a master's degree from Carnegie Mellon University found
一项关于对卡内基-梅隆大学硕士毕业生起付薪水的研究发现,
that 57 percent of the male students, but only 7 percent of the female students, tried to negotiate for a higher offer.
57%的男学生试图和雇主谈更高的薪水,而这么做的女生只有7%。
But instead of blaming women for not negotiating more,
我们不是谴责女性不敢去谈更高的薪水,
we need to recognize that women often have good cause to be reluctant to advocate for their own interests because doing so can easily backfire.
而是要承认她们在维护自己利益方面如此勉强完全是有正当理由的,因为这么做很容易让结果事与愿违。
There is little downside when men negotiate for themselves.
对男性而言,为自己的利益去谈判并不会产生什么负面影响。
People expect men to advocate on their own behalf, point out their contributions, and be recognized and rewarded for them.
人们已预期到男人会争取自己的利益,强调自己的贡献,认为自己应该被认可并获得回报。
For men, there is truly no harm in asking.
对男性而言,的确是“多问问也无妨”。
But since women are expected to be concerned with others,
但由于人们对女性的预期是关注他人,
when they advocate for themselves or point to their own value, both men and women react unfavorably.
所以当她们维护自己的利益或维护自身价值时,大家对此举都不会产生好感。
Interestingly, women can negotiate as well as or even more successfully than men when negotiating for others (such as their company or a colleague),
有趣的是,当为别人的利益谈判(比如同伴或同事)时,女性和男性表现得一样好,女性甚至会更好,
because in these cases, their advocacy does not make them appear self-serving.
因为在这种情况下,她们的主张不会让她们显得自私自利。
However, when a woman negotiates on her own behalf, she violates the perceived gender norm.
不过,当一个女性为自己争取利益时,她就违背了公认的性别规范。