I grew up white, secular and middle class in 1950s America.
我出生于五十年代美国的一个传统的白人中产阶级家庭里。
That meant watching fireworks on the Fourth of July,
这意味着,七月四号(独立日)要看烟花,
trick-or-treating on Halloween and putting presents under a tree at Christmas.
在万圣节不给糖就捣乱,以及圣诞节时会把礼物放在树下。
But by the time those traditions got to me, they were hollow, commercial enterprises, which just left me feeling empty.
到了我生活的年代时,这些传统变成了空洞的商业之事,让我感到空虚。
So from a relatively young age, I found myself looking to fill an existential hole, to connect with something bigger than myself.
所以从年轻的时候,我就开始寻找方法填补这个存在了的空洞,以期与更伟大的事物相连。
There hadn't been a bar mitzvah in my family in over a century, so I thought I'd take a shot at that
一个多世纪以来,我家没有举办过一场(犹太)成人礼,所以我想我应该试试看。
only to be devastated when my one encounter with the rabbi, a really tall, godlike figure with flowing white hair,
但和拉比(犹太教教义者)的相遇仍带来了毁灭性的打击,他很高,像神灵一样,有一头飘逸的白发,
consisted of him asking me for my middle name so we could fill out a form. Yep, that was it.
相遇时他询问我的中间名是什么,以填在表格上。是的,就是这样。
So I got the fountain pen, but I didn't get the sense of belonging and confidence I was searching for.
我拿起了那只笔,但并未获得我一直在寻找的归属感和信心。
Many years later, I couldn't bear the thought of my son turning 13 without some kind of rite of passage.
多年后,我无法容忍我的孩子将满13岁却没有举行任何仪式。
So I came up with the idea of a 13th birthday trip, and I offered to take Murphy anywhere in the world that had meaning for him.
所以我想出了这个主意--十三岁生日之旅。我提出带Murphy去这个世界上任何一个对他有意义的地方。
A budding young naturalist who loved turtles, he immediately settled on the Galapagos.
作为一个崭露头角喜欢乌龟的年轻博物学家,他毫不犹豫地选择了加拉帕戈斯群岛。
And when my daughter, Katie, turned 13, she and I spent two weeks at the bottom of the Grand Canyon,
当我的女儿Katie满13岁时,我们一起在大峡谷底部度过了两周,
where Katie learned for the first time that she was powerful and brave.
正是在那儿,Katie第一次意识到了自己的强大与勇敢。
Since then, my partner, Ashton, and lots of our friends and relatives have taken their kids on 13th birthday trips,
在这之后,我的另一半Ashton还有很多亲朋都带着他们的小孩儿开启了十三岁生日之旅,
with everyone finding it transformative for both the child and the parent.
无论是大人还是小孩,每个人都能看到它带来的改变。