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Will Bowen, a minister in Kansas City, Mo., is on a mission. His nonprofit organization, A Complaint Free World Inc., has distributed almost six million purple bracelets emblazoned with the group's name. When wearers find themselves complaining, they're asked to switch bracelets to their other wrists. The goal is to go 21 days without having to switch.
Granted, it's not easy for many of us to fully shake the all-American inclination to complain. Stereotypes are rooted in truth. A lot of young people grumble due to a sense of entitlement. A lot of older people are crotchety because they've been complaining all their lives. (Down in Florida, my mother describes condo-association bickering as 'nitpicking in paradise.')
But Rev. Bowen believes the bad economy may be the antidote we need to re-evaluate our lives. 'In good times, people often take for granted what they have, and whine about what they don't have,' he says. 'Bad times make people more grateful.'
Rev. Bowen is sponsoring a complaint-free cruise in April, and is also taking 30 congregants to Tanzania this summer to help rebuild a birthing center. 'We'll be meeting people who are so happy with so little,' he says. 'It can't help but reframe our perspective.'
Jon Gordon, a leadership trainer and author of 'The No Complaining Rule,' has collected research showing that gratitude reduces stress and improves health. Every morning, he takes a gratitude walk and thinks positive thoughts. He offers seminars to help people 'change a complaining voice to an appreciative heart.'
Some people today may be smartly cutting back on complaining because they recognize it can be detrimental to their careers, says Sherene McHenry, a professor of counseling at Central Michigan University. 'It isn't safe or wise to complain at work these days. When determining who to let go, nonunionized companies first get rid of complainers and those who are difficult to be around.'
Ultimately, you can't control the economy or whether you're laid off. And it's easy for the experts to rhapsodize about gratitude. But there are merits to tempering your complaints.
Dr. McHenry encourages us to write down three things we're grateful for every day -- no matter how simple they might seem. 'Some days,' she says, 'the list might be as basic as oxygen, food and shelter.'
