每个人都向往永恒的爱情。而事实上,日常生活中有许许多多的"绊脚石"正在悄然无声地影响着恋人们的爱情。认识到这些“绊脚石”(wrecker)后,我们又能采取哪些措施呢?
英国《每日邮报》顾问Andrew Marshall问道:“爱情的保质期比以前更短了么?人们分手的频率更快了么?”阅读下文,专家将为你解析爱情变量表中的上升和下降趋势,教你如何阻止爱情变质。
Relationships are changing faster than ever before? and so are the triggers for break-ups, says counsellor Andrew Marshall. Here is the authoritative guide to what's going up and what's going down in the argument charts and how to stop your relationship being derailed:
1. 降低期望值(上升趋势) One: Low Expectations (GOING UP)
我们“期望”爱情失败。“男人没一个好东西”和“女人都神经错乱”的想法已经从好友间的玩笑变成了自我应验的预言。我们等着新男友/女友犯错误,然后再将错误放大。
We expect relationships to fail. The "all men are bastards" mind set and "all women are bunny boilers" mentality has spread from being a joke with our mates into a self-fulfilling prophecy. We wait for our new boyfriend or girlfriend to trip up and then zoom in on their mistakes.
解决方法:如今,人们对不完美事物的容忍度大不如前。但是,如果我们能秉持坚持不懈的态度,更加相信自己,或许,我们不仅能解决这些潜在问题,更能收获一份亲密、美好的爱情。
Solve it: Today we are less willing to tolerate anything that is not 100 per cent perfect. Yet if we all hung in longer and believed in ourselves more, we would address the underlying issues and reap the rewards of a truly intimate and satisfying relationship.