Be very careful with how you behave and act when you want to get out of the friend zone and when you are getting serious with a girl.
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当你跟某个女孩正式交往的时候,如果想走出所谓的"朋友区",你就要在平时的举动上特别小心。
Today, I'm going to talk about how to get out of the friend zone. If you're in the friend zone, it means that you're a great companion, you're someone a girl likes to hang out with but you're not coming across the sexually attractive. So, this is about how you can subtly come across as sexually attractive.
今天我们来讨论一下怎样才能摆脱"朋友区"的命运。如果是一个恋人未满的身份,那么起码说明你还有一定的重要性,要么是一个很好的朋友,或者是一个很好的帮手。女孩们可能会愿意跟你一块儿出去玩,但不会轻易越过那道"最后的防线"。所以这期节目是关于如何成功"越线"的教程。
The number one aphrodisiac for girls is confidence. If you're confident in who you are, confident in the way that you look, confident in what you do, you're going to come across as very attractive. Now, this isn't confidence point of arrogance, this is confidence where you believe in yourself but you don't have to boast too much about it.
对于女性来说,最有效的归化剂是自信。如果你能对你自己的身份和面相、对你所从事的事业都是自信满满,那么你将会成为一个非常迷人的男人。不过自信不是自大,相信自己并不是到处招摇的自大。
Now, if you want to show that actually you are a bit different and you're not just a friend, do something to get yourself noticed and so that that girl sees you. So, it could be that you run a marathon, you win a competition, you do some voluntary work, you do something that really gets you noticed. In terms of being desirable, it can be something which makes you look different so you might lose weight or you could change your looks slightly going from a smart to a more casual look or you could have a completely different wardrobe.
如果你想被人认为并非普通人等,不想仅仅当一个可有可无的朋友,你需要做些引人注目的事情,这样你心仪的女孩才可能注意到你的存在。你可以参加马拉松,赢得一场比赛,或者参加一些志愿者工作,这些事情可以让你显得不平凡。如果你想有效地摆脱掉友达以上的标签,你可以做些大的改变,比如减肥、洗心革面,或者对自己的行头做一番迥异的改变。
The second thing about being desirable is that should be desirable to the opposite sex. So, to do this, you really want to show that as one of your friend, you have people of the opposite sex around you. So, it could be that you have girls around you that are also friends.
其次有效的方法是使自己变得招异性喜欢。你要让你心仪的女孩明白,即使她是你的女神,你还是有其他的异性朋友的,并且很受她们待见。而且,你身边的这些异性,同样可以成为自己的第二情人。
When you want to step up, should be getting out of the friend zone, you need to do some physical things. So, one thing that can be really good to get out of the friend zone is to go on a non-date. Now, a non-date is different from a date because it's not the same as the traditional things you do like going for dinner.
当你想走的更进一步时,你需要做些实事,坚持非正式约会是个不错的选择。非正式约会严格意义上讲并不算是约会,因为在这样的约会里传统的约会要做的事情,如共进晚餐,都不会发生。
It's something which doesn't feel so pressured. So, you might invite your friend out for coffee or you might do an activity together like going shopping or going to an exhibition. Now, once you've done this, you want to make it more obvious that you want to get out of the friend zone.
通常都是一些相对轻松的事情。你可以邀请对方出去喝一杯咖啡,或者一起出去购物,或者一起去参加展览。通过这些途径,你与对方更进一步发展的愿望将表达的更加清楚无疑。
So, make sure you're flirting. Now, the number one reason why guys do stay in the friend zone is because girls are getting messages. So, flirt, make it actually conscious that you're flirting so compliment her.
确保自己的状态。男孩子们停留在"友达以上,恋人未满"的状态,最主要的原因就是:除了过度的一本正经,女孩子们接收不到其他的信息。所以,大胆的谈情说爱吧,去表露自己的心意,去赞美她的魅力。
Maybe say how nice her dress is but then maybe take that flirting a bit further as you build more trust. Make it sound a bit more sexual, a bit more risky. So, it could be something like, "I like the way that dress hugs your figure".
也可以用衣服很有品这样的话获得她更多的信任,然后在此基础上更进一步:"这衣服在你身上提别合身。"
Something which girls really want to see is that they want to see that man's side of you so you don't just come across as a friend. So, this could be taking control of situations, ordering when you go to a restaurant, doing all the chivalrous things like opening doors, opening the car door, making sure that her coat's on when you leave the restaurant. When you've done all of this and you've actually got some confidence, you've got some feedback, the girl's flirting back, she's noticing you, she's admiring your achievements, then it's the time to make your move.
女生大多喜欢看到男性身上男人的一面,所以在作为备胎的时候也不能仅仅以一个朋友的身份行事。在任何情况下都要hold住场面,去饭店时候为她点菜,做所有体现骑士风度的事情,无论是刚到达的时候开车、开门还是离开时替她披上外(微博)套,所有这些都会收到丰硕的回报:对自己的满意,对方的青眼有加,对你的仰慕加暧昧。所有这些之后,就可以采取下一步的动作了。
Now, when I say make your move, I mean going for that kiss. Now, when you do your first kiss on the lips, you don't want to go over the top and be overly passionate but do a subtle kiss and it might be that you want to do the kiss with some words like, "I just want to kiss you" or "Could I kiss you?" So, this is how to get out of the friend zone.
现在该再进一步了,也就是到了我所说的定情一吻的时候了。第一次接吻的时候,不想毁了这个机会就不要过分用力,当然也不要热情过头,只要轻轻的一个吻,再加上几个字就更好了,比如说"我只想吻你一下"或者"我可以吻你吗?"这样,你就不再是一个可有可无、无关紧要的人了。
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