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编者注：本文的观点仅代表作者本人（由我们的合作伙伴发表），并不代表MSN或Microsoft的想法。
After 12 years together, my previously happy marriage was in the doldrums. It wasn't that I had fallen out of love. It was just that well… it had been 12 years. There's a malaise that sets in to anything you do for a long time. And it's easy for that spark that was once there to fade. And the truth is some of the things about my husband that I had either ignored or considered charming quirks, became qualities in him I wished would change.
在一起12年后，我原先的幸福婚姻已陷入低谷。而这并不是因为我失恋了。只是因为……毕竟已经12年了。任何事情做得久了都会让人有莫名的不安感。因此曾经的激情很容易褪却。事实是，丈夫身上那些我曾经忽视的或认为迷人的怪癖都变成我希望他能够改变的品质。
His domestic abilities, for example. When we met I didn't mind that he'd stop halfway through washing the dishes or just not noticing more needed to be done. I ignored the fact that he never did laundry and even celebrated the fact. After all, if he didn't do laundry, he couldn't ruin it. And, I accepted the fact that he couldn't function without a full night of sleep.
比如，他的家务能力。我们刚认识的时候，我并不介意他洗碗洗到一半停下来，也不介意他没有注意到还有家务活要做。我忽略了他从来不洗衣服的事实、甚至为此感到高兴。毕竟，如果他不洗衣服，衣服就不会被洗坏。我也接受他晚上睡不好觉就没有精力的事实。
It never mattered before we had kids, but kids like to do a thing called wake you up all night. His need for quality sleep meant I was on duty all night all the time. As a wife and mom, those little things that I never minded before in my husband began to be things I held against him.
在有孩子之前，这些都不是问题，但孩子特别喜欢让你整晚都睡不着。他需要优质睡眠就意味着我需要整晚看着孩子。作为妻子和母亲，我从来都不介意这些小事，直到丈夫开始做一些我特别不认同的事情。
And so I started to resent him. I resented his need for sleep and got annoyed, even angry, when he seemingly half-*ssed his way through helping around the house. I needed sleep too, but someone had to help that crying baby. And it's not like I wanted to do dishes or laundry any more than he did. Him leaving it felt like he was leaving it for me. After all, who else was he thinking was doing all that stuff he didn't want to?
所以我开是憎恶他。我讨厌他需要优质睡眠、当他做家务半途而废时，我会恼火甚至生气。我也需要睡眠啊，但宝宝哭了也得有人哄啊。而且，我和他一样也不想洗碗、洗衣服啊。他不做这些事就好像是为我而留一样。毕竟，谁还会做这些他不想做的事情呢？
That's when the spark started to wane-when I was knee-deep in laundry and he was sitting on the couch watching a show. When I was tired to the point of my eyes feeling like they were bleeding and he couldn't function without a full eight hours.
自那时起，我们之间的激情就消退了--当我跪着洗衣服而他却坐在沙发上看电视时。当我累到眼睛像在流血而他却不睡满8个小时就无精打采时。
The truth is, I wasn't just resentful. I was pissed off.
事实是，我不仅恨、还很生气！
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