Let me just begin by saying that there are two sides to every story and this is my side, the right one.

I used to be anonymous, nothing, nonentity.

Olive, that's your name, right?

Yeah, uh we've had 9 classes together since kindergarten.

Mmm…

So here it is, Part One.

Do you want to go out with me?

Brandon, just a couple of hours ago you told me you were gay.

You said I should pretend to be straight.

I didn't mean with me!

I am tormented everyday at school. Just one good imaginary fling.

Which brings us to Part Two.

Is that Olive with Brandon?

Now grunt, and make it convincing.

Oh.

Don't stop.

Oh, my goodness.

You are ready for the grand finale?

Yeah! What?

Ohhh.

Yeah……

Thank you.

What's up ?

I have thought that pretending to lose my virginity would be a little more special. Judy Blume should have prepared me for that.

Branden told me what you did for him.

No, he told me the truth, I was just hoping that maybe you could do the same for me?

So whether I like it or not, I was open for business. 20 percent off to Bath and Body Works? Is that how much our imaginary tryst meant to you? I fake-rocked your world.

We need to pray for her, but we also need to get her the hell out of here.

Amen.

On Monday, things took a turn for the scandalous.

Screw all these people, Olive.

Ironically, we were studying the The Scarlet Letter, this girl named Hester Prynne has an affair with a minister, is besmirched, and made to wear a red "A" for adulterer.

Perhaps you should embroider a red "A" on your wardrobe.

I am not proud of this.

No judgment, but you kinda look like a stripper.

Mom!

A high-end stripper, for governors or athletes.

Is she the one that everyone is talking about ?

Yes.

I know exactly what you're doing. If I promise not to tell anyone, can I kiss you right now?

I had a similar situation when I was your age, I had a horrible reputation.

Why?

Because I slept with a whole bunch of people, mostly guys.

Mom!