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Ross: Hey Mon, I saw the Porsche parked out front, can I get the keys? Thought I'd take that bad boy out for a little spin.
嘿，莫，我看到保时捷停在前门。你能把钥匙借给我一下吗？我想带那个坏小子去兜个风。
Rachel: Wait a minute! You let Ross drive the Porsche and when I ask you, you say you're the only one who's allowed to drive it.
等等，罗斯可以开你的保时捷，我问你时，你说只有你自己能开。
Monica: Yeah, well he's my brother! And plus he drives so slow he could never hurt it.
他是我哥哥，而且他开车跟乌龟爬一样，不会出事的。
Ross: It's a car Monica! Not a rocket ship!
那是辆车子，莫妮卡！又不是火箭飞船！
Monica: Whatever Ross! Just replace the bulbs in the brake lights after you're done.
罗斯。兜完风之后，帮我换一下刹车灯的灯泡。
Joey: Hey!
嘿！
Ross: Hey!
嘿！
Phoebe: Hey!
嘿！
Joey: Saw the Porsche out there Mon, looking good. When do I get to take that baby out again?
我看到保时捷了，莫妮卡，看着很酷。我什么时候能再开着它去兜风？
Rachel: You let Joey drive it? !
你让乔伊开保时捷？！
Phoebe: I've never driven it! Okay? Not once! Okay once. Okay, I drive it all the time.
我从来没开过，一次都没有。好吧，只有一次，好吧，我常开着出门。
Monica: Nice work everybody! So much for the you know, "You can drive it, but don't tell Rachel" plan!
谢谢各位啦，我们的"你可以开它去兜风但别告诉瑞秋"计划宣告失败。
Rachel: Wow! I can't believe you lied to me.
哇！我不敢相信你骗我。
Phoebe: Okay, I can fix this! Okay Monica, Rachel thinks all you can talk about is the wedding.
我可以解决这个问题。莫妮卡，瑞秋认为你脑子里只想着婚礼。
Monica: Great! Well Rachel, the reason why I won't let you drive the Porsche is because you're a terrible driver. There! That wasn't about the wedding.
我不让你开保时捷，是因为你是个糟糕的司机。怎么样，和婚礼无关吧。
Ross: Look Rach if you want to go for a ride in the Porsche I'll be glad to take you for a quick spin around the block.
如果你想做保时捷的话，我可以带你在附近转转。
Joey: Yeah, you got a couple hours?
你有几个小时吗？
Ross: Whew! That was a brisk ride!
多愉快的兜风呀。
Rachel: Take the top down did ya?
对我很显呀，是吗？
Ross: Only way to fly.
飞一般的感觉。
Rachel: Come on Ross give me the keys! Monica does not know what she's talking about! I am an excellent driver!
来嘛，罗斯，把钥匙给我。莫妮卡，她冤枉我了，我是个很棒的司机！
Ross: You're fast and irresponsible. That adds up to a bad driver.
你开车飞快，又不负责任。你的确是个差劲的司机。
Rachel: Well in High School, that added up to head cheerleader.
高中时，这几个特点让我成为啦啦队长。
Ross: Did you see the look that girl just gave me? Huh? She must've seen me cruising in the bad boy.
你有没有看到她在注视着我？她一定看到我开着保时捷兜风。
Rachel: I think she's checking out your beehive Ross.
她在看你的乱头发。
Ross: What? ! Give me a brush.
什么？借我一把梳子。
Rachel: Gimme the keys!
把钥匙给我。
Ross: No way!
没门！
Rachel: Well no brush!
那么，就不要想要梳子。
Ross: Fine! You know what? It doesn't matter, because, if I remember correctly, there is a comb on the floor of the bathroom.
好，一点关系都没有。如果我没记错，厕所里有把梳子。
Rachel: Alimony.
这是我的赡养费。
Monica: Chandler, we still haven't gotten an RSVP from your dad.
钱德勒，你爸还没寄回函给我们。
Chandler: Oh! Right. Umm, maybe that's because I didn't send him an invitation.
对，或许那是因为我没寄喜贴给他。
Monica: Chandler! He's your father; he should be at the wedding.
钱德勒！他是你爸爸，他应该来参加我们的婚礼。
Chandler: I don't even know the man. Okay? We're not the close. I haven't seen him in years.
我跟他根本不熟，我们关系很疏远，我好几年没跟他见过面了。
Monica: Well what are you gonna do when he finds out he wasn't even asked? !
如果他知道我们没有邀请他呢？！
Chandler: Well he doesn't have to know! It's not like we run in the same circles. I hang out with you guys, and he stars in a drag show in Vegas.
我们的生活圈不一样。我跟你们来往，而他在拉斯维加斯表演变装秀。
Phoebe: I think I wanna trade circles.
我想我们可以互相换一下角色。
Chandler: Trust me, you don't want him there either. Okay? Nobody is gonna be staring at the bride when the father of the groom is wearing a back-less dress.
相信我，你不会希望他在婚礼上的。没人会盯着新娘，当新郎的父亲穿着露背装。
Monica: So what! As long as he's not wearing a white dress and a veil I don't care.
只要他不是穿着婚纱，我就不在乎。
Phoebe: Okay, I think I need to do some shopping.
我想我需要去买点东西。
Rachel: Ahhh! Ooh, nice!
太棒了！
Rachel: My God!
我的天啊！
Ross: What do you think you're doing? !
你想要干什么？！
Rachel: Just washing the windshield.
我只是在洗挡风玻璃。
Ross: There is no way I am letting you drive this car! So why don't you just hand over the keys?
我绝不会让你开这辆车。你为什么不把钥匙还给我。
Ross: No ah-ah-ah! Do not start this car! Okay! Okay! I will give you twenty bucks if you get out of this car right now!
不！别启动引擎。好吧 我给你二十块，只要你立刻下车！
Rachel: Look Ross, if you're so freaked out, just get in the car!
听着，罗斯。如果你真的那么害怕，就快上车吧。
Ross: With you? ! Yeah right!
跟你一起去兜风？！好主意啊！
Rachel: All right.
好吧。
Ross: Okay! Okay! Okay!
好！好！好！
Rachel: What are you doing? ! Get in the front!
你在干什么？坐到前面来。
Ross: In the death seat? !
在那个要命的位置上？！
Rachel: Oh my…
哦，我……
Man: Hey guys!
嘿，大家好！
Phoebe: Hey sweetie!
嘿，亲爱的！
Man: Ready to go?
准备好了吗？
Phoebe: Yeah! Sure! Ooh, I left my purse up at Monica's. I'll be right back.
是，当然，我的皮包在莫妮卡家，我马上回来。
Man: Wait a minute!
等一下。
Phoebe: What? Oh. Ooh. Whoa! That one kept going.
干吗？噢。这个吻还有效呢。
Joey: So! You and Phoebe huh? How long have you been going out?
那么，你和菲比，怎么样啦？你们在一起多久啦？
Man: Over a month.
一个月了。
Joey: Wow! Maybe uh, maybe you and I ought to get to know each other a little better.
我们要进一步了解对方。这样很好。
Man: Sure, I'd like that.
好，我很乐意。
Joey: So, what's your name?
所以你叫什么名字？
Man: It's Jake.
我是杰克。
Joey: Joey. Hey Jake, do you like the Knicks?
我是乔伊。你喜欢尼克斯队吗？
Jake: Yeah, big fan.
当然，铁杆球迷。
Joey: Me too! There's a game on Tuesday do you wanna go?
我也是，星期二有比赛，你要一起去吗？
Jake: Yeah that would be great! Let me make sure I'm not doing anything Tuesday.
真棒！我得确认下礼拜二没事。
Monica: Here!
拿去吧。
Chandler: What's this?
那是什么？
Monica: It's your suitcase. We're going to Las Vegas.
你的行李箱。我们去拉斯维加斯。
Chandler: Are you serious? ! I mean like eloping? ! No more stupid wedding stuff? ! No more these flowers or these flowers or these flowers. Think of the money we'll save! ! We're not eloping. I love the flowers. Can our wedding be bigger please?
你是认真的？私奔？不考虑那些愚蠢的婚礼的东西。不考虑是这些花还是那些花。想想这样我们能省多少钱。我们不是私奔。我们的婚礼能不能更宏大一些，拜托？
Monica: We're going to Las Vegas to see your dad. It's time you two talked, and I want to get to know my father-in-law.
我们要去拉斯维加斯找你爸。你们俩该谈谈了，我想认识我公公。
Chandler: You know we already went over this and I won!
我们已经谈过这件事了，我赢了！
Monica: No you didn't. Oh and honey just so you know, now that you're marrying me, you don't get to win anymore.
不，你没赢，亲爱的，你应该知道你马上要娶我进门了，你以后就别想赢了。
Chandler: Look forget it okay? I don't want to go. I don't want to see him. I don't wanna.
算了吧，我不想去。我不想见到他，不想。
Monica: Chandler, look I know that your dad embarrassed you. I know…
钱德勒。我知道你爸让你觉得丢脸，我知道……
Chandler: No-no all kids are embarrassed by their parents, you'd have to come up with a whole new word for what I went through.
所有的孩子都会觉得自己的父母很丢脸。你得想个新说法来形容我的苦痛经历。
Chandler: When I was in High School, he used to come to all of my swim meets dressed as a different Hollywood starlet.
在高中的时候，他参加了我所有的游泳比赛，每次都打扮成不一样的好莱坞明星。
Chandler: You know it's hard enough to be fourteen. You're skinny. You're wearing speedoes. That your mom promised that you would grow into!
我十四岁的日子很不好过。我瘦巴巴的，泳裤太大，我妈还说有一天我穿着会合身！
Chandler: And you look up into the stands and there's your dad cheering you on dressed as Carmen Miranda. We was wearing a headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends as a healthy snack!
我抬头看着看台，发现我爸在我为加油。他打扮成卡曼·米兰达，戴着有真水果头饰的帽子，之后他会把那些水果分给你的朋友作为餐后水果。
Monica: Hey, the point is that he was at everyone of your swim meets and he was there cheering you on! Okay? That's a, that's a pretty great dad.
重点是他参加了你每一场游泳比赛，到现场帮你加油。他是个好爸爸。
Chandler: He had sex with Mr. Girabaldi!
他跟嘉利巴迪先生上床了！
Monica: Who's Mr. Girabaldi?
谁是嘉利巴迪先生？
Chandler: Does it matter? !
那很重要吗？！
Monica: Chandler, you're not fourteen anymore. Okay? Maybe it's time that you let that stuff go. If your father's not at your wedding. you're gonna regret it for the rest of your life.
钱德勒。你不再是十四岁的孩子，好吗？你该忘了那些往事。如果他没来参加你的婚礼，你会遗憾终生的。
Chandler: Yeah okay, but I'm just doing this for you.
好吧，但我这么做是为了你。
Monica: Yes!
太棒了！
Chandler: So I really never get to win anymore?
我永远都赢不了吗？
Monica: How much did ever really win before?
你以前又赢过几次？
Joey: Pheebs!
菲比！
Phoebe: Hey!
嗨！
Joey: Listen, you know how uh, when you're wearing pants and you lean forward I check out your underwear?
你知道当你穿着裤子，身体往前倾时，我可以看到你的内裤吗？
Phoebe: Yeah!
知道！
Joey: Well, when Jake did it I saw that he was wearing women's underwear!
杰克弯腰的时候，我看到他穿着女人的内裤。
Phoebe: I know. They were mine.
我知道，那是我的内裤。
Joey: Oh. No! No wait, that's weird!
不不！等一下，那样太奇怪了。
Phoebe: No, it's not! We were just goofing around and I dared him to try them on.
我们只是闹着玩，我跟他打赌他不敢穿。
Joey: That's weird!
那真的很奇怪！
Phoebe: I'm wearing his briefs right now.
我正穿着他的内裤。
Joey: That's kinda hot.
那还挺性感的。
Phoebe: I think so too. And that little flap? Great for holding my lipstick.
我也这么觉得，你知道前面那个小洞吗？刚好可以拿来放我的口红。
Joey: Yeah, I wouldn't know about that.
这种事情我倒没机会知道。
Phoebe: And! You know what Jake says? That women's underwear is actually more comfortable. And he loves the way the silk feels against his skin.
杰克说，女人的内裤更舒服。他喜欢丝质内裤贴在皮肤上的感觉。
Joey: Yeah well next thing you know, he'll be telling you that your high heels are good for his posture!
接下来他会说穿上你的高跟鞋，他更婀娜多姿！
Phoebe: There is nothing wrong with Jake! Okay? He is all man! I'm thinking even more than you.
杰克没什么不正常的。他是个货真价实的男人。我担心的是你。
Joey: Oh yeah, he looked like a real lumberjack in those pink laceys.
他看起来像是穿着粉红色蕾丝内裤的伐木工人。
Phoebe: I'm just saying that only a man completely secure with his masculinity could walk around in women's underwear! I don't think you could ever do that.
我是说只有真正相信自己有男子气概的男人，才会穿上女人的内裤。我敢说你办不到。
Joey: Hey! I am secure with my masculinity.
我很相信自己的男子气概。
Phoebe: Okay whatever.
随便你。
Joey: You've seen my huge stack of porn right?
你看过我收集的色情杂志吧？
Rachel: God. I forgot how much I love driving. I have got to get my license renewed.
天啊，我都忘了我有多爱开车。我得去换新驾照。
Ross: You don't have a valid driver's license? Okay that is it! Pull over right now!
你的驾照过期了？好了！马上停车！
Rachel: Oh Ross you're so tense! You just gotta relax okay? Just need to relax all right? Just need to relax.
罗斯，你太紧张了。你得放轻松，好吗？你只需要放轻松，好吗？放轻松。
Ross: What are you doing? ! Are you…Okay that's not funny! Just stop horsing around!
你干什么？这不搞笑。停下来换我来开。
Rachel: I am not horsing around okay? I am Porsching around.
我才不是在开车？我是在飙车。
Ross: Okay, stay calm. Nothing is going to happen to you, you are not in that much trouble.
保持冷静，不会有事的。你没有惹上大麻烦。
Rachel: Really? You think so?
真的吗？你那么觉得？
Ross: I was talking to myself! You're going down!
我是在跟自己说话！你死定了！
A Waiter in Drag: Someone taken your order yet?
有人来帮你们点东西了吗？
Monica: Uh oh yeah, she did. Uh, he did. She? I'm sorry I'm new. I don't…
对，她来过了，是他才对，是她吗？抱歉，我第一次来，我不...
Waiter in Drag: Hm-mmm?
嗯？
Chandler: Yeah, I just ordered a beer!
我点了一杯啤酒。
Waiter in Drag: You're straight. I get it.
你是直男，我懂了。
Monica: I still say that if we had called your dad we coulda gotten better seats.
如果我们打电话给你爸爸，我们会有更好的位置。
Chandler: No! No! I don't want him to know we're yet! I'm not sure I'm ready for that. And besides he's not gonna be too happy to see me either.
我不想让他知道我们在这里。我还没准备好。而且他看到我也不会太高兴。
Monica: Why not? !
为什么？！
Chandler: I don't know if I've told you this, but he's kinda tried to get in contact with me a lot over the last few years
我不知道我有没有告诉你，过去几年他常常试着跟我联络。
Monica: What? !
什么？！
Chandler: Yeah, he's made phone calls, written letters, he even came to New York, but I always said I was too busy to see him. You know it's all very Cats in the Cradle. I don't want to get into it. Here we go.
对，他会打电话，写信给我。他会到纽约来，但我总是说我很忙。就像是"恶意缺席"。我真的不想谈。节日要开始了。
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen please welcome the incomparable Helena Handbasket!
各位先生女士，欢迎与世无双的海莲娜·汉德巴斯奇。
Helena: Hello darlings.
嗨，我的小亲亲们。
Chandler: And there's daddy!
他就是我爸！
