Ross: All we're saying is don't rush into anything.

Joey: Yeah, come on, think about it. You're 18, ok, she's 44, when you're 36, she's gonna be 88.

Frank: What, you don't think I know that?

Chandler: All right, I'm gonna go play basketball.

Or at least let the really good guys use my ball while I say "Can I play? Can I play?" Oh uh, Joe, you left your keys in the door. Oh. Here you go.

Joey: The point is, there's a lot of women out there you haven't even had sex with yet!

Ross: Yeah, he he's right, he's right. This is your time you know, yeah, you're young, you're you're weird, chicks dig that.

Frank: Ok, but isn't sex better when it's with one person that you really, really care about?

Joey: Yeah, in a poem maybe.

Ross: No the man's right, that's what I had with Rachel.

Frank: You don't have it anymore?

Ross: No, I ah, I slept with someone else.

Frank: Okay, so wait, all right, so how does that make things better?

Ross: It didn't.

Frank: Okay, so what you used to have with Rachel, is what I've got with Alice.

Joey: Now, wh what, what is that like?

Frank: It's so cool man, it's so, it's just 'cause being with her is so much better than like not being with her. Yeah, yeah.

Joey: Why can't I find that? Don't ask me, I had it and I blew it! Well, I want it! You could have it!

Joey: I don't know, maybe I can't. I mean, maybe there's something wrong with me. Oh, no! No! It's out there man! I've seen it! I got it! !

Joey: Then you hold on to it! All right, man! !

Joey: All right, congratulations you lucky bastard!

Phoebe: You're Frank's best man? !

Joey: I couldn't help it, their love is so pure.

Phoebe: Well uh, what about you? ! Huh? !

Ross: I'm the ring bearer.

Phoebe: Hi! Oh, Alice, hi! Thanks. I'm so glad you could come, 'cause I've got a real umm, Home Ec emergency.

Alice: Oh my God, who died on this? !

Phoebe: Yeah, I know. It's a real mustard tastrophe, yeah. Can you help me?

Alice: Absolutely. Ok, first we'll start with a little club soda and salt, and then if that doesn't work we can go back to.

Phoebe: You know what, forget it. It's ruined.

Alice: Oh no no, never say that. If we can't get it out then we can cut around the stain, add a little lace, you make a stylish throw.

Phoebe: Or instead, maybe you could just not marry my brother Frank.

Pete: Ok, that's great, but can we make it smaller? Can we make it fit on the head of a pin? I love when we make things fit on the head of a pin.

All: Got it. Yeah, ok. You have a Miss Monica Geller here.

Pete: Uh, absolutely, yeah, send her in. Hi.

Monica: What the hell is this?

Pete: Hang on a second. I'll I'll talk to you in the morning. I'm sorry what?

Monica: Seriously, what is this supposed to mean?

Pete: Well, you know, I never know how much to tip.

Monica: You're supposed to double the tax. Not double the tax of Romania.

I mean, what's what's the deal? Are you, are you trying to buy me? Is this the way you get girls to go out with you? Umm, I'm still here

Pete: You're taking this all wrong. Because, if I didn't leave you that tip, you wouldn't've come down here, we wouldn't be having this argument, and there wouldn't be this ah, heat between us.

Monica: What? ! Come on, you gotta uh admit that our relationship is ah, is hitting a new level now.

'Cause you used to be like the chef, and I was the customer, and now we're like this this couple that fights.

Monica: Ok, umm, you're a loon.

Pete: Look, forget the check, ok? I like you. I think you're great. Come on, what do you say?

Monica: I don't know now.

Pete: Why not?

Monica:'Cause I don't wanna encourage this kind of behavior.

Pete: One meal! That's all I'm asking for. Please? We go out, we eat, and if you don't have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.

Frank: Hi. Wait, no! Just put the mail down. It's it's me!

Phoebe: Ok. Whoa, sorry. Why were you just like all in the dark?

Frank: Oh well, um, your, your laundry smelled so good, that I thought I'd curl up in it. Is that all right? Oh, yeah, sure. So, how was your day?

Frank: Oh, well just probably the worst one since I've been alive.

Phoebe: What umm, what happened?

Frank: Umm, Alice ah, she ah, called it off.

Phoebe: Oh no. Did umm, did she say why?

Frank: Uh, no, not really, just that I was too young, you know, but I don't see how I could all of the sudden be too young, 'cause I'm older than I was when we first got together.

Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, no, I don't, I don't know. But, you know what, maybe it's just all for the best?

Frank: Yeah, if the best is just like unbelievable pain!

Phoebe: Oh, sweetie, oh.

Frank: You know what, you know I just was finally happy you know. For the first time in my life!

After my Dad left me, and then, and then getting arrested for stealing those birds, and then, and then the whole punctured lung thing!

I can, it's still really hard to take deep breaths in cold weather, but with Alice all that stuff kinda went away. And now it's, and now it's gone and I don't know why!

Phoebe: Uh, well I can tell you why. It's, it's because of me. But, you know what, I only did it because I love you. Ok?

Frank: What?

Phoebe: Umm, well I, I kinda've had a little chat with Alice, and I sort of made her see why you two shouldn't be together, you know. And you're gonna see it to, one day, you really, really will.

Frank: Wait a minute, wait, this is because of you?

Phoebe: Ok. Well, you, wait, no, my Mother didn't want us to be together, but the worst thing she ever did was tie me to the porch. Ok, but.

Frank: Wait, you know what, I I came to you because I thought you'd understand! Oh no! ! You know, aw! I would storm out of here right now if if I had some money, or a place to go.

Joey: Huh, uh, so, Ross, if you had a million dollars, what's the first thing you'd buy?

Ross: I'd probably get some municipal bonds, and then put the rest of the money in the bank, and live off the interest.

Joey: Well.we've heard from Dr. Fun.

Rachel: Oh my God! The millionaire's here! Oh my God!

Monica: Guys, please, I'm just gonna have dinner with him. Ok?

Chandler: Ok, ok, just because he buys you dinner, does not mean you owe him anything.

Monica: I know! !

Chandler: Ok, then get the lobster!

Monica: Hey! Hi. Hi! Hey! Hi! Hey, how much cash you got in your pocket right now?

Monica: And that's why, I'm not inviting you in for a drink. Bye.

All: Oh no no no no. Just one drink? !

Monica: Where do you wanna go? Hey, you like pizza? Oh, that sounds great. I know a great little place.

Pete: You're, hey, you're not paying for the pizza!

Monica: Oh come on, it's only fair, you paid for the flight. Now is, is that enough lire?

Pete: Ahh, I'd throw another thousand on that.

Monica: Why, how much is that? That's about 60 cents.

Joey: Every night! !

Hypnosis Tape: You do not need to smoke. Cigarettes don't control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke.

A strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke.

Joey: Ow.

Phoebe: Hey, Frank. Look, ok, I know that you think I did this like totally evil thing, but I so didn't. There's someone here who can explain this better than I can.

Alice: Hi Frank.

Frank: Hi, Mrs. Knight.

Alice: Phoebe's right, Frank. I know it's hard to hear, but it would've been wrong to go through with it.

I I I was being selfish, even though we, we want the same things right now, in the future we may not. Is that it, is that what it is? Yes, but not just that.

Alice: Right, not just that. Umm, even though we love each other as much as we do, nonetheless.

Phoebe: Nonetheless. Nonetheless. Umm, you're too young to, to really know what you want.

Phoebe: That's right, exactly. All right, it's a goodbye kiss, that's good. Bye bye.

Ok, no, the important thing is that you see what I'm saying, you know, just, you know, this is clearly wrong. Ok, I've decided I'm gonna let this happen!

Ok, can I just get my purse? Ok, all right, good.

Hypnosis Tape: Cigarette's don't control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke.

Joey: Joey's your best friend. You wanna make him a cheese sandwich everyday. Oh, oh, and you also wanna buy him a hundreds of dollars worth of pants.