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But the first time that I took my book out of my suitcase, the coolest girl in the bunk came up to me and she asked me,
但是当我第一次把书从行李箱中拿出来的时候，床铺中最酷的那个女孩向我走了过来，并且她问我：
"Why are you being so mellow?" -- mellow, of course, being the exact opposite of R-O-W-D-I-E.
“为什么你要这么安静？”安静，当然，是R-O-W-D-I-E的反义词，“喧闹”的反义词。
And then the second time I tried it, the counselor came up to me with a concerned expression on her face
而当我第二次拿书的时候，我们的顾问满脸忧虑的向我走了过来，
and she repeated the point about camp spirit and said we should all work very hard to be outgoing.
接着她重复了关于“露营精神”的要点，并且说我们都应当努力去变得外向些。
And so I put my books away, back in their suitcase, and I put them under my bed, and there they stayed for the rest of the summer.
于是我放好我的书，放回了属于它们的行李箱中，并且我把它们放到了床底下，在那里它们度过了暑假余下的每一天。
And I felt kind of guilty about this.
我对这样做感到很愧疚。
I felt as if the books needed me somehow, and they were calling out to me and I was forsaking them.
不知为什么我感觉这些书是需要我的，它们在呼唤我，但是我却放弃了它们。
But I did forsake them and I didn't open that suitcase again until I was back home with my family at the end of the summer.
我确实放下了它们，并且我再也没有打开那个箱子，直到我和我的家人一起回到家中，在夏末的时候。
Now, I tell you this story about summer camp. I could have told you 50 others just like it
现在，我向你们讲述这个夏令营的故事。我完全可以给你们讲出其他50种版本就像这个一样的故事
all the times that I got the message that somehow my quiet and introverted style of being was not necessarily the right way to go,
每当我感觉到这样的时候，它告诉我出于某种原因，我的宁静和内向的风格并不是正确道路上的必需品，
that I should be trying to pass as more of an extrovert.
我应该更多地尝试一个外向者的角色。
And I always sensed deep down that this was wrong and that introverts were pretty excellent just as they were.
而在我内心深处感觉得到这是错误的，内向的人们都是非常优秀的，确实是这样。
But for years I denied this intuition, and so I became a Wall Street lawyer,
但是许多年来我都否认了这种直觉，于是我首先成为了华尔街的一名律师，
of all things, instead of the writer that I had always longed to be
而不是我长久以来想要成为的一名作家，
partly because I needed to prove to myself that I could be bold and assertive too.
一部分原因是因为我想要证明自己也可以变得勇敢而坚定。
And I was always going off to crowded bars when I really would have preferred to just have a nice dinner with friends.
并且当我只是想要和朋友们吃一顿愉快的晚餐时，我总是去那些拥挤的酒吧。
And I made these self-negating choices so reflexively, that I wasn't even aware that I was making them.
我做出了这些自我否认的抉择，如条件反射一般，甚至我都不清楚我做出了这些决定。
