But technology is producing one modern trend that I find particularly important.
但科技正在制造一种当代潮流,我认为它尤为重要。
It's associated with the concept of paradox of choice.
它和选择悖论这一概念相关。
For millions of years, we lived in little hunting and gathering groups.
千万年来,人类都生活在小型狩猎及采集社会。
You didn't have the opportunity to choose between 1,000 people on a dating site.
那时的人没有机会在社交网站上千里挑一选择对象。
In fact, I've been studying this recently, and I actually think there's some sort of sweet spot in the brain;
事实上,从我最近对此的研究来看,我认为大脑中有某种“最佳状态点”。
I don't know what it is, but apparently, from reading a lot of the data, we can embrace about five to nine alternatives,
虽然我并不知道在哪儿,但从大量数据来看,人类只能接受大概5~9个选项,
and after that, you get into what academics call "cognitive overload," and you don't choose any.
在此之后会变成某些学者称的“认知超载”,结果是不再做出选择。
So I've come to think that due to this cognitive overload, we're ushering in a new form of courtship that I call "slow love."
于是,我想正是由于这种认知超载,我们引进了一种新型求爱方式,我称其为“慢慢爱”。
I arrived at this during my work with Match.com.
这些都是我在Match.com工作时总结出来的。
Every year for the last six years, we've done a study called "Singles in America."
过去六年中我们做了一项研究,名为“美国单身”。
We don't poll the Match population, we poll the American population.
我们民调的对象不仅针对Match.com的会员,而是整个美国人口。
We use 5,000-plus people, a representative sample of Americans based on the US census.
我们调查了5000多人,这是基于美国统计局的代表性样本。
We've got data now on over 30,000 people, and every single year, I see some of the same patterns.
目前已收集了超过3万人的数据。每年我都看到同样的模式。
Every single year when I ask the question, over 50 percent of people have had a one-night stand
每年我向他们提问的结果是,超过50%的人有一夜情的经历,
not necessarily last year, but in their lives -- 50 percent have had a friends with benefits during the course of their lives,
并不一定是上一年,而是他们一生中,在他们的有生之年,50%的人曾经和朋友上过床。
and over 50 percent have lived with a person long-term before marrying.
超过50%的人在婚前有过长期同居的经历。
Americans think that this is reckless. I have doubted that for a long time; the patterns are too strong.
美国人认为这是轻率的行为。但我一直不这么认为,毕竟这种模式太普遍。
There's got to be some Darwinian explanation -- Not that many people are crazy.
肯定有某种类似于达尔文生物进化的地方,总不会是那么多人都丧失了理智?