So in other words, we know most of what we know about regret by the study of finance. But it turns out, when you look overall at what people regret in life, you know what, our financial decisions don't even rank.
换句话说,我们是通过金融研究了解了遗憾。但结果是当你思量人们生命中的憾事时,我们的财务决定根本就是排不上号。
They account for less than three percent of our total regrets.
理财上的遗憾都不及总的遗憾的百分之三。
So if you're sitting there stressing about large cap versus small cap, or company A versus company B, or should you buy the Subaru or the Prius, you know what, let it go.
那么如果你因为不知道选个大帽子还是小帽子苦恼,或者纠结于公司A和B,斯巴鲁还是普瑞斯,那么还是别操那个心了。
Odds are, you're not going to care in five years.
因为你五年之内都不会在意这个的。
But for these things that we actually do really care about and do experience profound regret around, what does that experience feel like?
而对于我们真正在乎并且会深深抱有遗憾的事物,会是什么样的感受?
We all know the short answer. It feels terrible. Regret feels awful.
不用说我们都知道。会无比地痛心后悔。但结果显示懊悔。
But it turns out that regret feels awful in four very specific and consistent ways.
主要由四个非常特有的,连贯性的阶段组成。
So the first consistent component of regret is basically denial.
第一个就是否认。
When I went home that night after getting my tattoo, I basically stayed up all night.
当我那晚纹了身回家时,我一夜没睡。
And for the first several hours, there was exactly one thought in my head.
头几个小时,我脑子里只有一个念头。
And the thought was, "Make it go away!" This is an unbelievably primitive emotional response.
就是“我不要这样!”这是个令人难以置信的初始情绪。
I mean, it's right up there with, "I want my mommy!"
就像是心里想着“我要妈妈!”
We're not trying to solve the problem. We're not trying to understand how the problem came about. We just want it to vanish.
根本不想解决问题。不试着去了解问题的根由。就是希望错误消失。