Trying to do it all and expecting that it all can be done exactly right is a recipe for disappointment.
试图做到一切还期待做得超级完美,这必然导致希望落空。
Perfection is the enemy.
完美主义是我们的大敌。
Gloria Steinem said it best: "You can't do it all.
格洛丽亚·斯泰纳姆的话很贴切:“你不可能做到一切。
No one can have two fulltime jobs, have perfect children and cook three meals and be multi-orgasmic 'til dawn ... Superwoman is the adversary of the women's movement."
没有人能做两份全职工作,不仅把孩子照看得很好、一天三餐都下厨,还可以在凌晨享受性高潮……女性运动要反对的就是‘女超人’。”
Dr. Laurie Glimcher, dean of Weill Cornell Medical College, said the key for her in pursuing her career while raising children was learning where to focus her attention.
美国康奈尔医学院的院长劳丽·格林奇博士认为,在养育孩子的同时追求事业,关键要学会自己应该在哪方面集中注意力。
"I had to decide what mattered and what didn't and I learned to be a perfectionist in only the things that mattered."
“我们得决定哪些事重要、哪些事不重要,并且在那些真正重要的事情上力求完美。”
In her case, she concluded that scientific data had to be perfect,
她得出的结论是:科学数据必须完美,
but reviews and other mundane administrative tasks could be considered good enough at 95 percent.
但评论意见和其他琐碎的行政事务能做到95%就够好的了。
Dr. Glimcher also said she made it a priority to get home at a reasonable hour,
格林奇博士还说,在合理的时间下班是自己首要考虑的事,
adding that when she got there, she refused to worry about whether "the linens were folded or the closets were tidy.
而且到家之后绝不能为了衣服是否叠好或橱柜是否打理整洁而焦虑。
You can't be obsessive about these things that don't matter."
她提醒我们说:“你不能过度地迷恋那些不重要的事情。”
A few years before I became a mother, I spoke on a women's panel for a local business group in Palo Alto.
还没做母亲时,我曾在一个商业团队的女性座谈会上发言。
One of the other panelists, an executive with two children, was asked the (inevitable) question about how she balances her work and her children.
一位有两个孩子的执行官曾被问到她如何平衡事业和家庭(这是个避不开的问题),
She started her response by saying, "I probably shouldn't admit this publicly ..."
她回答说:“我可能不应该公开承认这一点……”
and then she confessed that she put her children to sleep in their school clothes to save fifteen precious minutes every morning.
随后就向大家坦白,她让孩子们穿着校服睡觉,这样早上就能省出宝贵的15分钟。