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Tony was talking about how he wound up getting paid to care less – less about his sick patients,
托尼说他是如何因为少关心病人，
less about the specialism that demanded years of study, less about the career he had spent decades practising.
少关心需要多年学习的专业，也不太关心他几十年来从事的职业而得到报酬的。
But all the talking proved something else: he still cares – a bit too much for his own good.
但所有的谈话都证明了另一件事：他仍然在乎——对他自己来说有点过分了。
Remembering his 30-plus years as a pharmacist, he recalled, in a Midlands singsong,
在一首英格兰中部民谣中，他回忆起自己30多年的药剂师生涯，
a man who once came in with a sore on his head that kept catching on his razor.
有一次，一个头上有疮的男人走进来，手里一直抓着剃刀。
Tony had a look. “I says, ‘Get to the doctor.’
托尼看了看。“我说，去看医生。”
“He says, ‘What, in a few weeks?’ ‘No. Now.’”
“他说，什么，几周后？“不是。现在。”
It turned out to be a skin cancer that the doctor began treating straight away.
结果他得的是一种皮肤癌，医生马上开始治疗。
Then there was the woman who wanted more antibiotic eyedrops.
还有一位女士想要更多的抗生素眼药水。
Tony just knew something didn’t look right and refused to sell her anything.
托尼知道有些东西看起来不对劲，所以拒绝卖给她任何东西。
Instead he packed her off to the GP.
相反，他把她送到了全科医生那里。
And the doctor immediately flagged up a possible brain tumour.
医生立刻发现她可能长了脑瘤。
“A hunch,” Tony shrugged. “Through years of experience you just develop an instinct.”
“预感。”托尼耸了耸肩。“经过多年的经验，你就会发展出一种本能。”
Such are the memories by which he measures out his life.
这就是他用以衡量自己生命的记忆。
No sprints down a hospital corridor, no anguished shouting in an operating theatre.
不用在医院的走廊里疾跑，也不用在手术室里痛苦地喊叫。
His has been an unheroic career – but a life-changing, even life-saving, one.
他的职业生涯并不是英雄主义的，但却改变了他的生活，甚至拯救了他的生命。
“They’ve had cancer, marriage split-ups … men even talk about their impotence.”
“他们得了癌症，婚姻破裂...男人甚至会谈论自己的阳痿。”
No wonder they bring these troubles to his counter: in his mid-50s,
难怪他们把这些麻烦带到他面前：在他50多岁的时候，
Tony emits the ready sympathy of a dad at the school gates at hometime.
托尼在家时，在校门口流露出父亲般的同情。
How many of these patients guessed that their own chemist was sick?
这些病人中有多少人会猜到他们自己的药剂师生病了？
Over the past few years, depression has dug its claws into Tony.
在过去的几年里，抑郁已经把它的利爪伸向了托尼。
He is tired all the time. His weight, blood sugar and blood pressure have shot up.
他总是很累。他的体重、血糖和血压都急剧上升。
