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How can we as feminists make that gap the beating heart of women's fight against oppression, against the stultifying ideology of what women are meant to be, and not allow the same internal breathing space to men? Surely our chance of a better world relies on the ability of all of us to stop, think and reject the most deadly "requisite" behaviours? No man comfortably possesses masculinity (any more than, other than by killing, one person is in total possession of anyone else). Indeed, such mastery is the very delusion that underpins the deranged and most highly prized version of masculinity on offer. Prowess is a lie, as every inch of mortal flesh bears witness. But like all lies, in order to be believed, it has to be endlessly repeated.
作为女权主义者，我们怎么能让这个鸿沟成为女性反抗压迫、反抗“女性应该怎么样”的愚蠢意识形态的心跳，又怎么能不让男性拥有同样的内在呼吸空间呢？我们建设一个更美好世界的机会，肯定取决于我们所有人是否有能力阻止、思考和拒绝最致命的“必要”行为？没有一个男人能舒舒服服地拥有男子气概（除了杀人，一个人完全拥有另一个人）。事实上，这种征服恰恰是一种错觉，支撑着所提供的疯狂且最受珍视的阳刚之气。英勇是谎言，每一寸血肉之躯都能作证。但就像所有的谎言一样，要想被人相信，它必须不断地重复。
One of the most striking aspects of the saga of Hollywood producer and sexual abuser Harvey Weinstein, as told by Jodi Kantor and Megan Twohey who broke the story in the New York Times, is that he seems to have been at least as keen on the slow burn of coercion and resistance, which would sometimes go on for hours, as on any act of so-called consummation.
据乔迪·坎特和梅根·图伊在《纽约时报》上的爆料称，好莱坞制片人兼性侵者哈维·韦恩斯坦的传奇故事中最引人注目的一点是，他似乎对强迫和抵抗的缓慢燃烧(有时会持续几个小时)和任何所谓的圆满行动都很感兴趣。
Rowena Chiu, for example, describes how, shortly after being hired as his assistant, she endured four hours of threats, cajoling and bribes. At the end, "He parted her legs, and told her that with one single thrust it would all be over". She managed to get out of the room. (What exactly, we might ask, was in it for him?) Clearly, for Weinstein, the revulsion he provoked was a core component of his pleasure, which is not to say that he did not also wish to get his way with these women. "If he heard the word 'no'," commented one of the key witnesses in the February 2020 New York rape trial, who chose not to be named, "it was like a trigger." For Zelda Perkins, another assistant who was subjected to his assaults, he was "pathologically" addicted: "It was what got him out of bed in the morning."
例如，罗威娜·邱描述了自己在被聘为他的助理后不久，如何忍受四个小时的威胁、哄骗和贿赂的过程。最后，“他把她的双腿分开，告诉她只要插一下一切就都结束了。”她设法逃出了房间。(我们可能会问，他究竟从中得到了什么好处？)显然，对韦恩斯坦来说，他激起的反感是他快乐的核心部分，这并不是说他不希望在这些女人身上为所欲为。“如果他听到‘不’这个词，”一位不愿透露姓名的关键证人在2020年2月纽约强奸案审判中评论道，“它就像一个触发器。”对另一位受到他侵犯的助理泽尔达·帕金斯来说，他是“病态式”成瘾：“每天早上他就是靠这个从床上爬起来的。”
If sexual violence always tends to spiral out of control, it is because the agent of that violence must know deep down he is on a losing wicket. Weinstein's physical collapse after his arrest can therefore be read not just as a staged plea for sympathy – a day after photos were released showing him using a walking frame on his way into court in December 2019, he was seen walking around a supermarket unaided – but also as an inadvertent display of the fragility and eventual bitter truth of the human body, a truth his predatory behaviour was designed to conceal from the women he abused, from the world, and from himself.
如果说性暴力总是趋于失控，那是因为暴力的执行者必须在内心深处知道自己正处于失败的边缘。因此，韦恩斯坦被捕后的身体崩溃可以被解读为不只是假惺惺地寻求同情——2019年12月他在法庭上使用助行架的照片被公布一天后，有人看到他在一家超市里独自走动——同时也无意中揭示了了人类身体的脆弱和最终痛苦的真相，他的掠夺行为是为了向他虐待过的女性、世界和他自己隐瞒这一真相。
