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First thing we're gonna do is harvest one of the top two most important ingredients of the coconut macaroon, which is the coconut.
我们要做的第一件事就是收获做椰子马卡龙最重要的两种原料之一，也就是椰子。
They swim up here to spawn.
它们游到这里来产卵。
And while we're technically not supposed to harvest spawning coconuts, this is when they taste their richest and milky...
虽然严格来讲，我们不应该收获正在产卵的椰子，但这是它们奶味最浓最柔和的时候……
Oh, come on...
哦拜托……
That's just cheap.
太小气了吧。
To get this coconut shredded, you want to place it on the grass, grab your push mower, and gently push your mower up to the edge of the coconut until it's fully stabilized.
为了把椰子切碎，你得把它放在草地上，拿出你的除草机，平缓地把除草机推到椰子的边缘，直到它完全稳定下来。
Now slo-mo smash a different coconut, hold your grater against the stabilized handle, take a piece of coconut, and grate that into your bag.
现在慢动作砸碎另一个椰子，把你的研磨器放在稳定的把手上，拿一块椰子，把它磨碎装进袋子里。
The mowage vibrations really help get these into the right size and shape for macaroons.
除草机式的振动真的有助于把这些椰子弄成适合做马卡龙的大小和形状。
Except that the mower isn't actually on because I let go of the safety handle and also this lawnmower doesn't work.
不过除草机没开，因为我拔掉了安全把手，而且这个除草机是坏的。
If you don't live near a river where the coconuts spawn, you can also cut some grass clippings, put them in a bowl with some icing sugar.
如果你住的地方附近没有椰子产卵的河，你也可以剪一些草，把它们放在碗里，加点糖霜。
And just Wang-Jangle those together with your pair of snippy Lever-Knives until they become 100% pure coconut.
然后用你那副锋利的杠杆刀具（剪刀）将它们搅拌混合，直到它们变成100%纯正的椰子。
Or you can take those grass clippings and paint them with some whiteout, which is basically an ancient analogue "delete button", but these macaroons would be strictly decorative.
或者你也可以把那些剪下来的草涂成白色，这基本上是一个古老的类似于“删除按钮”的东西，不过这些马卡龙完全就是用来作为装饰的。
"Hey mom, I made you a Mother's Day thing."
“嘿，妈妈，我给你做了个母亲节礼物。”
"Get out of my room."
“滚出我的房间。”
"Okay."
“好的。”
Now that we have the coconut issue sorted out, you're gonna have to collect some condensed milk.
既然椰子的问题已经解决了，现在你就得去收集一些炼乳了。
The way you do that is by going to the store and buying a can of it.
你要做的就是去商店买一罐。
So we're gonna combine equal parts coconut and condensed milk.
我们要把等份的椰子和炼乳混合在一起。
And I forgot my can ope... oh, there it is.
我忘了拿开罐器……哦，在这呢。
You might notice that condensed milk looks exactly like glue.
你可能会注意到炼乳看起来跟胶水一模一样。
Well, you know what they say, "If it looks like glue, and it tastes like sweet baby cow food, then it's probably delicious glue."
你知道的，大家都这么说，“如果一个东西看起来像胶水，尝起来像甜甜的小牛犊吃的东西，那么它可能是美味的胶水。”
Now. Let's just Wang-Jangle these together until it looks like coconut coleslaw.
现在让我们把它们搅拌混合，直到它看起来像椰子卷心菜沙拉。
Then you want to parchment paper your pan.
然后在锅里铺上烤盘纸。
Then take a spoon, or a little ice-cream scoop, and try to make these around the size of a golf ball.
然后拿一把勺子，或者一把小冰淇淋勺，试着把它们弄成高尔夫球大小。
The easiest way to do that is to use a baseball for scale, and you're aiming for about half the size of the baseball.
最简单的方法是拿一个棒球来作为比例参照，你的目标是弄成大约棒球大小的一半。
Let's just double-check that. Yep, looks good.
我们再检查一下。是的，看起来不错。
We're gonna put the Un-do on Three-Fundo.
我们把烤箱开到350度。
Slide these inside, and we'll bake them until they start to get a little golden brown.
把它们放进去，将它们烤至表面略微金黄。
Probably about 12 minutes or so.
大概12分钟左右。
You can also turn the broiler on for a minute at the end if they're not golden enough.
如果不够金黄，你也可以在最后把烤肉功能打开再烤一分钟。
Now you can stop here.
到这一步你就可以停止了。
The macaroons are done.
马卡龙就做好了。
But when you die, do you want your friends and family to have known you as someone who made mediocre macaroons, or as someone who made the best macaroons possible?
但是当你离开人世了，你希望你的朋友和家人记得你是做了平庸马卡龙的人，还是做了最好的马卡龙的人？
If you want to be known as someone who made the best macaroons possible, turn off this video, get a better recipe that involves egg whites and other fancy bullshxx and start over.
如果你想被认为是做了最好的马卡龙的人，那就关掉这个视频，找一个更好的食谱，里面有蛋清和其他花式废话的那种，然后重做。
But if you want to make the best macaroons with the least amount of work possible, it's time to get some chocolate.
但是如果你想用最少的力气做出最好的马卡龙，那就是时候买些巧克力了。
Since you don't own a double boiler and you probably don't know how to use a microwave, we're gonna melt this directly in the pan.
鉴于你没有双层锅炉，也可能不知道怎么用微波炉，所以我们就直接把它放进锅里融化。
It's the simplest and most dangerous way to melt chocolate, cause chocolate's easy to burn.
这是融化巧克力最简单也最危险的方法，因为巧克力很容易烧焦。
Go on the lowest possible temperature and stir continuously, and most importantly, "Do not get distracted".
把火力调到最低，持续搅拌，最重要的是，“不要分心”。
If you only have one hand available, tape the handle of your pot to a big bottle of booze.
如果你只有一只手，用胶带把你的锅把粘在一大瓶酒上。
Don't stop stirring, I said!
不要停止搅拌，我说过的！
Now cut off that duct tape and get ready to drizzle that chocolate anyway-you-want-late.
现在把胶带剪掉，准备好浇巧克力，随便你想怎么浇。
You can do "The Dripsy Doodle", "The Jerky Circle", "The Cheap Zebra", "The Lost Archaeological Treasure", or "The Lake of Chocolossum".
你可以做“水滴涂鸦”、“牛肉干圈”、“小气斑马”、“失落的考古宝藏”或“巧克力湖”。
If there's some extra chocolate leftover, stir in some more coconut and you get bonus cookies.
如果还有剩余的巧克力，加一些椰子进去，你就得到了额外收获小饼干。
In fact, you might as well just make these instead they're easier and they're Certified Glue Free.
事实上，你也可以直接做饼干代替马卡龙，做饼干更简单，而且它们有无胶水认证。
Look at this.
看它们。
So many different styles of chocolate perfection.
这么多不同风格的完美巧克力。
This is a real opportunity to express yourself.
这是一个表达自己的好机会。
And these tastes awesome, so it really doesn't matter if they look good or...
它们味道棒极了，所以看起来好看与否并不重要……
Oh, actually that one looks really pro.
哦，这个看起来真的很优秀。
Not pro. Pro.
不咋地。优秀。
Not Pro. Pro.
不咋地。优秀。
Not Pro. Pro.
不咋地。优秀。
Now you're finally ready to serve your macaroons, with a side of prunes, and maybe a bag of runes, and a handful of balloons, with three or four spoons, while listening to some tunes in the afternoon until it becomes evening and you can gaze up at the entire outer space region.
现在你终于准备好端上你的马卡龙了，配上梅子，也许还有一袋符文，还有一些气球，和三到四个勺子，在下午听着一些曲子，直到晚上，你可以抬头注视整个外部空间。
