Grandpa was not a man who could outwardly express his grief around others, and we all worried about him. There had been talk of his giving up the farm. My parents thought he was too old to live out there alone. He wouldn't hear of it, though. I was proud of the way the old man had stood his ground. The rest of the summer flowed by. We stayed busy working. I thought there was something different about Grandpa but couldn't quite put my finger on it. I started to wonder if he would be better off living with someone after all, but I knew he could not leave the farm.

外公不会在人前表现自己的悲痛，我们都为他担忧。已经有人在谈论他要放弃农场。我父母认为他年纪太大，不宜一个人单独住在那儿，但他不会听进去的。老人家如此坚持我倒为此感到骄傲。夏天剩下的日子像流水似地过去了。每天忙忙碌碌，我感到外公和过去有所不同了，却又说不出一个所以然来。我开始在想是不是还是有人陪着外公一起住更好些，可是我也知道他离不开农场。

September was nearing, and part of me did not want to leave. I thought of skipping the fall semester and staying around a few more months. When I mentioned it, grandpa quickly told me that my place was back at college.

九月临近了，我有点不想离开。我想秋季这学期不上学，在这儿再呆几个月。我向外公提出这个想法时，外公马上就说我应当返校读书。

The day finally came for me to pack my car and leave. I shook his hand and chanced a hug. As I drove down the driveway, I saw him in the rearview mirror. He waved to me and then walked to the pasture gate to start the morning livestock check. That's how I like to remember him.

终于到了我离开的时候。我把行李装上车，和他握手道别，还偶然拥抱了一下。车子从车道上开走时，我从后视镜里看到他。他向我挥挥手，然后走向牧场门，开始一上午对牲口的巡查。这就是为何我老想着他。

Mom called me at school on a blustery October day to tell me Grandpa had died. A neighbor had stopped by that morning for coffee and found him in the kitchen. He died of a stroke, same as Grandma. At that moment, I understood what he'd clumsily tried to explain to me about the swan on that morning we fished together by the pond.

十月的一个刮大风的日子，妈妈打电话到学校里告诉我外公死了。那天早晨邻居上他家喝咖啡时发现他在厨房里。和外婆一样，他也是患中风死的。我这才明白，我和他在池塘钓鱼的那天早晨，为何他解释天鹅之死时显得那么艰难。