SAT经典范文赏析
露营狂欢Camp Carnival
Colleen M. A final example of planning being effected by an unpredictable occurrence happened in my own personal experience with a camp carnival. As the leader of the camps' events for the month of June, I created the idea of a carnival, complete with entertainment games, and lunch. After months of detailed planning including invitations, entertainment, refreshments, food, and setup, I could not wait for the exciting day. Although the date was especially picked after examining the weather, there is no counting on Mother Nature. After a wonderful and entire hour into the carnival, the sky became cloudy and drops of water began to fall. Although was disappointed,I learned that due to the unexpected, even regarding the most detailed plans, there is nothing that guarantees the perfect execution of such a plan.
点评:Colleen在写这个段落之前可能读过Kent的个人经历的例子。如果她读过,很好;如果没读过,更好。不管怎样,她的句子结构和Kent的一样复杂多变,看看她的从句:As the leader of the camps' events for the month of June, I created the idea of a carnival, complete with entertainment, games, and lunch. After months of detailed planning including invitations, entertainment, refreshments, food, and setup, I could not wait for the exciting day. Although the date was especially picked after examining the weather, there is no counting on Mother Nature.另外,我喜欢"Mother Nature"这个稍稍有点奇特的用法。