3. The Withholding
3.隐瞒
Keeping things to yourself is one thing, but withholding is something else. Withholding is when one or both of the people in the relationship refuse to share how they really feel to keep the other person from harm. That may seem nice, but it’s actually toxic because if something is wrong, the other person has no idea about it and therefore can never hope to fix it. The brokeness spreads, and eventually the relationship will fall apart. Open up, or you’ll have to pick up the pieces.
自己知道是一回事情,但隐瞒对方却是另一回事情。在一段关系中,如果你选择拒绝说出自己真实感受以此来保护对方这种做法时,虽然这看起来没错,但实际上这是大错特错。因为如果你隐瞒的事情是错的,而你的伴侣根本不知道这件事,错误就永远也得不到解决。这种错误会一直伤害你们并最终将你们的关系土崩瓦解。你有两种选择:开诚布公的谈一谈,或者你将不得不收拾你造成的残局。