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Okay, I see. So, not a dvd burner.
好吧 我明白了 那就不买刻录机。
Exactly. Something he wouldn't buy for himself. Something fun. Something like... an 802-11n wireless router!
很正确。他不会给自己买的，能给他带来快乐的东西，比如……802-11的无线路由器！
Here you go, Copenhagen boy. How about a taste of hans christian hand grenade?
该你了哥本哈根小鬼，试试德国产的手榴弹滋味如何？
Oh, that could not feel good.
那感觉一定很糟。
Come on, come... oh, you clever... Come on. Come on. Take that!
来呀，来呀……你这个机灵……来吧。看我的！
Uh-oh! Uh-oh! What's the matter? This granola bar, it has peanuts in it! Oh, my god. Why did you eat it?
啊哦！啊哦！怎么了？这燕麦卷棒上面有花生粒！天啦，为什么你还要吃？
I don't know. It was just there!
我哪知道，它刚好就在那儿！
If I had a gun there, would you have shot yourself?
如果那儿是把枪你会崩了自己吗？
Don't yell at me! I've got to the emergency room!
别骂我！我得去急诊科！
Now? No, after my tongue has swollen to the size of a brisket!
现在去？等我的舌头肿成鸡胸脯那样再去！？
All right, uh, just let me get my keys. Oh, god, oh, god, oh, god! The laundry is out of the hamper.
好吧我去拿钥匙。天呀，天呀，天呀……衣服已经腾出盥洗篮。
Okay, Sheldon, what was it supposed to be? Fine. It's out of the washer!
拜托，谢尔顿，你说还能是什么意思？好吧，是洗衣机还不行嘛！
I'll call you when it's in the dryer.
等进入烘干机我再给你打电话。
All right, let's go.
好了，咱们走。
What do you think? Um, that one.
你觉得呢？唔，那个吧。
Because of the two additional ethernet ports?
因为有两个附加的以太网端口？
Sure. He doesn't need them. He's already got a six-port ethernet switch.
没错。他不需要，他已经有个6端口转换器了。
Oh, okay, then this one. Why?
好那就买这个吧。为什么？
I don't know. The man on the box looks so happy.
我不知道，包装上这男的笑得很开心。
Penny, if I'm going to buy Leonard a gift, I'm going to do it right.
佩妮，如果我要给兰纳德买礼物我就要买合适的，
I refuse to let him experience the same childhood trauma I did.
我不想让他遭受我童年的精神创伤。
I know I'm gonna regret this, but: What trauma?
我知道我会后悔问的，是什么精神创伤？
On my 12th birthday, I really wanted a titanium centrifuge so, you know, I could separate radioactive isotopes. Of course.
我12岁生日时非常想得到一个钛金属离心机，我就能分离放射性同位素了。当然。
Instead of a titanium centrifuge, my parents bought me... wow, this is hard. They got me a motorized dirt bike.
我父母没有给我买钛金属离心机而是……唉，难以启齿。他们给我买了辆机动山地车。
No! What 12-year-old boy wants a motorized dirt bike?
不是吧。哪个12岁男孩想要机动山地车？
All of them? Really? Yeah.
每一个。真的吗？ 对呀。
Okay, so we're getting this one? Yeah, I suppose. All right, let's go.
好啦我们就买这个了？嗯，我想是的。很好咱们走。
Excuse me. Do you know anything about this stuff?
打扰一下，你对这个东西有了解吗？
I know everything about this stuff.
我对这个东西了如指掌。
Okay, I have my own wholesale flower business and I want to hook up my computer in the front entrance with the one in my refrigerated warehouse.
好的，我开了一家鲜花批发店，我想把前台和冷冻仓库的电脑连接在一起。
Here, buy this one, Look, it's the one we're getting. See? Happy guy.
买这个，我们买的就是这个，看他笑得多开心。
No, no, no, she doesn't want that. She needs a point-to-point peer network with a range extender. Thank you.
不不不她不能买那个，她需要的是有区域扩展功能的点对点网络。谢谢。
Which hard drive do I want--firewire or usb? It depends on what bus you have available.
我要买哪个硬盘？火线还是USB？这取决于你用的什么总线了。
I drive a Chevy Cavalier.
我开的是雪弗莱跑车。
Oh, dear lord. Sheldon, we have to go. Not now, penny. This poor man needs me.
上帝啊。谢尔顿我们得走了。现在不行，佩妮，这个可怜人需要我。
You, hold on. I'll be right with you.
你等等，我一会儿就帮你。
What computer do you have? And please don't say "a white one."
你的电脑是什么样的？别跟我说是白色的。
Excuse me. Fill this out. Have a seat.
打扰一下。填表坐着等
No, listen. See, we're throwing my friend a surprise party and I'm supposed to keep him out of his apartment for two hours.
不听着，我们要给朋友开一个惊喜派对，我得把他骗出公寓两个小时。
Fill this out and have a seat.
填表坐着等。
No, see, the only way I could get him to leave was to tell him I ate a peanut because I'm allergic to peanuts.
不你瞧，我骗他离开的唯一办法 就是告诉他我吃了花生，因为我对花生过敏。
Well, in that case, fill this out and have a seat.
好，这样的话，填表坐着等。
Look, all I need from you is to take me in the back and give me a band-aid so I can pretend I had a shot of epinephrine,
拜托我需要你带我到后面去给我贴个创可贴，我可以假装打了一针肾上腺素，
and then you tell my friend you need to keep me under observation for about an hour, hour and a half.
你可以告诉我朋友需要留下观察一小时或一个半小时。
Is that all you need? Yes. Get out of my ER.
你就想要这个？ 是的。滚出急诊室。
No, you don't understand. Oh, I understand, but unfortunately, this hospital is not equipped to treat stupid.
不你不明白。我明白，算你倒霉，这医院不给傻子治病。
Okay, I get it. I know how the world works. How about if I were to introduce to you to the man who freed your people?
好吧我懂了，我知道这社会怎么回事儿。不如介绍你认识一下赋予你们自由的领袖吧？
Unless my people were freed by Benjamin Franklin and his five twin brothers, you are wasting your time.
除非我们的领袖是本杰明·弗兰克林和他的五个孪生兄弟，否则你在浪费时间。
Hey, sorry, I couldn't find a parking spot. How are you doing? Bad, very bad.
对不起我一直没找到停车位，你怎么样了？糟糕非常糟糕。
Really? You don't look like you're swelling up at all.
真的吗？ 你看上去一点都不肿啊，
Maybe we should just pick up some benadryl at the drugstore and go home.
或许我们应该去药店买些抗组织胺药然后回家。
We can't go home. Why not?
我们不能回家。为什么不能？
Because... because... brisket! Brisket! Water! Need water! I'll be right back.
因为……因为……鸡胸脯！鸡胸脯！水！我要喝水！我马上回来。
Penny, listen, I've got a problem.
佩妮，听着，我有麻烦了。
Yeah, well, so do I. Look, you gotta stall Leonard a little longer. I don't think I can.
唔，我也是，你得多拖住兰纳德一会儿。我想我做不到。
You have to. We all have to be there at the same time to yell surprise.
必须做到，我们要同时到给他个惊喜。
Okay, you have to understand something. We're in a hospital right now.
你要了解情况，我们现在在医院
Why? Is Leonard okay?
为什么？ 兰纳德，还好吗？
Leonard's fine. I'm fine. Thanks for asking, by the way.
兰纳德很好，我也很好，谢谢你关心顺便说一声。
Okay, I don't need your attitude. Listen, just hold him there a little longer.
你别发脾气，再多拖住他一会儿。
Look, I've done my best, but he wants to go home and I don't know how to stop him.
我已经尽力了，他想回家我不知如何阻止他。
Okay, how about this? You keep him there a little longer, and when you get to the party, I'll point out which of my friends are easy?
这个建议怎样？你多拖住他一会儿，等你到了派对上我会告诉你我哪个朋友比较容易泡？
Don't toy with me, woman.
别耍我啊，丫头。
I got a hot former fat girl with no self-esteem,
我认识一个减肥成功而且没有自尊的辣妹，
I got a girl who punishes her father by sleeping around and alcoholic who's two tequila shots away from letting you wear her like a hat.
和一个为了惩罚她爸爸和别人乱搞的女孩，还有一个酒鬼妹在两杯龙舌兰下肚后任你摆布。
Then will be done.
我会搞定的。
I'm doing this for you, little buddy.
我可是为了你才做的，小伙计。
Okay, we don't have that in stock... but I can special-order it for you. Him.
我们现在没有存货……不过可以为你专门预定。就是他。
Excuse me, sir. You don't work here.
对不起先生，你不在这里工作。
Yes, well, apparently, neither does anyone else.
没错，显然没人在这里工作。
Sheldon, we have to go.
谢尔顿，我们得走了。
Why? Well, for one thing, we're late for Leonard's birthday party, and for another, I told him to call security.
为什么？第一，兰纳德的生日派对我们要迟到了，第二我让他去叫保安了。
Good luck. by the way, a six-year-old could hack your computer system.
祝你好运。顺便说一下，6岁孩子都能黑了你的电脑。
Keep walking. "1234" is not a secure password.
快走。1234做密码可不安全
Excuse me, my friend is having an allergic reaction to peanuts. No, he's not. Yes, he is.
对不起，我朋友对花生有过敏反应。不他没有。他真的过敏了。
Look, sir, we are very busy here, and I... holy crap!
先生，我们很忙我……我的妈呀！
Please help me! Code four! I need a gurney! Right away! Right away! Thank you.
请救救我！急救！这里需要担架！在这里在这里。谢谢你。
Say what you will about the healthcare system in this country, but when they're afraid of lawsuits, they sure test everything.
虽然你对医疗体系充满期待，可他们怕吃官司还是会做全面检查。
I really don't think the colonoscopy was necessary.
结肠镜检查真没必要。
You know, before you got all swollen up, I actually thought you were trying to keep me out of the apartment so you could throw me a surprise party.
要知道在你肿起来之前，我以为你要骗我出公寓好为我开一个惊喜派对。
Oh, right, it's your birthday. I had no idea it was your birthday. I completely forgot. Wow, what a lousy way to spend a birthday. Well, it's all over now.
也是哦，今天是你生日，我不知道是你生日我完全忘记了，这个生日过得太糟了，现在全都完了。
There is a party, isn't there? Maybe.
确实有派对是吗？可能吧。
Howard? Are you mad? How could I be mad? You actually risked your life because you care about me.
霍华德？你生气了？我怎么会生气呢？你可是冒了生命危险，因为你关心我。
Yeah, that's why I did it.
对，所以我才这么做的。
All right. Here we go. My first birthday party.
好的，咱们瞧瞧，我第一个生日派对。
I see your true colors and that's why I love you.
我看到了你的本色这就是为什么我爱你。
Dude, everybody left an hour ago. Surprise!
兄弟，大家一小时前就走了。惊喜！
Ok Leonard, here I am on your birthday party.
快看兰纳德，我在你的生日派对上。
I don't know where you are, dude, but it's really kick-ass!
我不知道你在哪儿哥们儿，但这个派对真的棒呆了！
Everyone is very, very drunk and... oh, and look, there's a girl taking her shirt off!
每个人都喝得很醉很醉而且……快看那个女孩把上衣脱了！
That's my friend Carol. Remind me--I gotta introduce her to Howard.
她是我朋友卡萝。差点忘了我要把她介绍给霍华德的。
Oh, sweet Krishna, shake that Rupee maker!
亲爱的卡丽什娜！把卢比制造机晃起来！
I'm so sorry you didn't get your party. Oh, it's okay.
对不起你没赶上自己的派对。没关系。
Well, happy birthday, anyways.
不管怎样还是祝你生日快乐。
Hey, Penny, wh-wh-when's your birthday?
嘿，佩妮，你什么时候过生日？
