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Done. Look, guys, for the future, I don't mind killing the big spiders, but you have to at least try with the little ones.
好搞定。听着男同胞们，我不介意以后替你们干掉大蜘蛛，但那么小的你们总得自己搞定吧。
Penny, please. We're facing a far more serious problem than stray arachnids.
佩妮，别说了。我们面对的问题可比蜘蛛纲动物严峻得多。
Sheldon, it's not so bad. Not bad? It's horrible.
谢尔顿，没有那么糟。不糟？简直是恐怖。
I mean, you hear stories about this sort of thing, but you never think it'll happen to you.
这种事时常听到，但从没想到会发生在自己身上。
So they steamed your dumplings. Get over it.
他们不就是蒸了一下你的饺子嘛，算了吧。
New topic, please. All right, Penny. Let me take this opportunity to point out that you are looking particularly ravishing today.
换个新话题吧。好佩妮，那就让我借此机会说，你今天可真是迷死人啊。
Not with a thousand condoms, Howard. So, there is a number.
戴上一千个安全套也不行，霍华德。这么说还真有数量问题呢。
Okay, new topic, please. Hey, did you hear the people upstairs in 5A are moving out? No, shh-shh-shh! What?
够了，换个新话题吧。嘿，你们听说5楼A座的人要搬出去了吗？不，嘘嘘嘘！什么？
The people upstairs are moving out. No! The horror...
楼上的人要搬走了。不！骇人听闻。
Why would you just say something like that? How else was I supposed to say it?
你为什么要这样说话？那我还能怎么个说法？
Let's slowly. Like putting a new fish in a tank. You don't just drop it in. You let the bag sit in the water a while.
有点铺垫嘛，就像把金鱼放进鱼缸，不能一下子就把它扔进去吧，你得把袋子在水里放一会儿。
Sheldon, I'm sure it's going to be fine. No, it's not going to be fine.
谢尔顿，我肯定会没事的。不，怎么可能没事。
Change is never fine. They say it is, but it's not.
改变从来不会没事，人们从来都这么说，但事实并非如此。
Okay, honey, did you even know the people that are moving out?
那么亲爱的，你认识那些要搬走的人么？
I never met them. That's what made them perfect.
我从没见过他们，所以他们才如此完美。
There were no awkward "hello" in the halls. There's no clickety-clacking of high heel shoes on hardwood floors.
不用尴尬地在走廊里打招呼，没有硬木地板上咔嗒咔嗒的高跟鞋声。
They may as well have been a family of cats just jumping around from drape to drape.
他们就像是一窝猫，在帘子间跳来跳去。
Without that annoying ammonia urine smell.
但他们没有尿液中烦人的氨味。
Well, I'm sure the new people will be just as quiet.
我肯定新来的人也会同样安静的。
You can't know that. How can you possibly know that?
你怎么知道，你怎么可能知道？
You're right, I can't. You know what? Anyone could rent that apartment now, an opera singer, the cast of Stomp...
你说得没错，我不知道，告诉你，任何人都有可能租下那间公寓，歌剧演员啦，少年街舞演员啦。
Yeah, a tap-dancing pirate with a wooden leg.
对，还有装着木腿的踢踏舞海盗啦。
Why are you making it worse? I tried making it better. He wouldn't go for it.
你为什么要越搞越糟？我想往好的方面说，可他不听啊。
You're right! That's a great idea. What? I'll take the apartment upstairs.
没错，那是个好主意。什么？我要租下楼上的公寓。
I can finally get away from my mother and we can all spend some more time together. If you catch my drift. The horror...
我终于可以离我妈远远的了，我们也能有多一点时间在一起了。如果你明白我的意思的话。骇人听闻...
Hold on. You honestly expect me to believe that social protocol dictates we break our backs helping Wolowitz move, and then he only need buy us a pizza?
等等，你们真的以为我会相信？礼节上我们这么拼命替沃勒威茨搬家，他只需要买个匹萨给我们吃？
I'm sorry, that really is how it works. You' tricking me.
抱歉，不过事实就是如此。你们在耍我。
You tell me the truth, what do we get? Raj, help me out here.
给我说实话，我们到底有什么好处？拉杰，帮帮忙吧。
You get to choose between a mountain bike or a PS3. I knew it!
你可以在山地车和PS3之间选一个。我就知道！
PS3, definitely PS3. Who would pick a mountain bike?
PS3，绝对是PS3了。谁会选山地车啊。
Enough with the guilt, Ma. We'll still see each other. I'll come over every night and have dinner with you.
别再让我有负罪感了老妈，我们还是会见面的。我会每晚过来和你共进晚餐的。
The hell you will! What am I running here, a fancy restaurant?
吃你个大头鬼！你把这儿当什么地方了？高级餐厅？
Does this look like Olive Garden?
我这看着像橄榄树花园(意式餐厅)么？
Okay, I get it, you're angry. You don't want to see your little bird leave the nest.
好吧我了解了，你生气了，你不愿见到你的小鸟离巢。
"Little bird"? You're almost 30! Fly, for God's sake!
小鸟？你都快30了！看在上帝的份上，快飞吧！
Fine, I'll stay! Ya happy, crazy lady? I sure as hell hope so, because you're ruing my life!
好我不搬！开心了吧疯婆子。这肯定如你所愿，因为你就是要毁了我的生活！
Hey, Penny? It's Leonard. Good news, you can take your head out of the oven.
嘿，佩妮吗？我是兰纳德。好消息，你可以把脑袋从烤炉里拿出来了。
I guess I won't be needing this.
看来我也不用戴这玩意儿了。
Oh, no...The new ones. They are here. Stay calm. We don't know anything about them yet.
噢，不……新来的。他们来了。别冲动，我们还对他们一无所知。
What are you doing? I'm checking for musical instruments.
你在干嘛？我在检查有没有乐器。
Does that sound like castanets to you? The box says "kitchen."
你觉得这个听起来像响板么？盒子上写着厨具。
So? Do cocaine smugglers write "cocaine" on the box?
那又怎样？毒贩子会在盒子上写可卡因吗？
Hello? Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. I'm Alicia. I'm moving in upstairs. That is so great.
你好。你好。你好。你好。你好。你好。我是艾丽西纳，我要搬进楼上了。真是太棒了。
Oh, I'm Leonard. I live downstairs. Upstairs from here, but under you. Not under you per se, but under your apartment.
噢，我是兰纳德，我住在楼下。在这儿上头，不过在你下面。实际上不是在你下面，而是在你的公寓下面。
That's nice. Yeah, it is. If that concludes your faltering attempt to mate...
真不错。是啊。你的举动表明你有何她交配的冲动。
Hello. Hello. On a scale of one to ten, how light of foot would you describe yourself, with one being not cat-like at all, and ten being freakishly feline?
你好。你好。一到十，你给自己脚步声做个描述。一代表完全不像猫类，十代表简直就是猫中之猫。
"Freakishly feline"? Is that your answer or do you not understand the question?
猫中之猫？这是你的答案还是你没听懂问题？
We'll come back to that one. Sheldon...Hang on. Are you now or have you ever been a salsa, Irish folk or break-dancer?
这个待会再说。谢尔顿...等等，你现在或曾经跳过萨尔萨舞，爱尔兰民舞或者霹雳舞吗？
No. You're making her uncomfortable. Oh, I'm sorry.
没有。你问得她不自在了。抱歉。
Well, if it helps you feel any better, you're doing very well so far. Next question: are you fertile?
到目前为止你表现的很好，希望这能让你感觉好点。下一个问题，你能生育吗？
What? I'm trying to determine whether crying infants above my head are a possibility.
什么？我想知道以后楼上会不会有哭闹的婴儿。
I have no immediate plans. If that changes, let me know. And finally, area rugs, pro or con?
目前没有打算。如果有，告诉我。那最后，小地毯，赞成还是反对？
Pro? Alicia? Yes? Welcome to the building.
赞成？艾丽西纳？什么事？欢迎来到这里。
Thanks so much for helping me, Leonard. Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to help.
多谢你帮忙，兰纳德。多谢你给我这个帮助你的机会。
Oh, hey, guys. Hey, Penny. This is Alicia, our new neighbor. Hi. Hi. I'm helping.
噢，你们好啊。嘿，佩妮，这是我们的新邻居艾丽西纳。嘿。嘿。我在帮忙。
I can see. Alicia is non-musical, childless and pro-rug.
看见了。艾丽西纳不玩音乐，不生孩子，赞成小地毯。
She's still on probation, of course, but I like her.
当然她还在试用期，不过我喜欢她。
Cool T-shirt. Oh, yeah, I don't usually dress like this. I'm going jogging.
好酷的T恤啊。噢是啊，我通常不这么打扮，这正要去慢跑呢。
You don't jog. I can start.
你平时不慢跑的。这不正要开始么。
True, but the more likely explanation for your attire is that you're out of clean clothes again.
那是，不过更合理的解释是，你又没有干净的衣服穿了。
Thank you, Sheldon. You're welcome, Penny.
谢谢你，谢尔顿。不客气，佩妮。
Please, you look cute. I'm dressed like a slob today, too.
得了吧，你看上去多可爱，我今天也穿得像邋遢鬼似的。
I think you look fantastic. This one's a player, huh? Oh, yeah, be careful.
我觉得你看起来棒极了。这家伙很会演戏，哈。噢是啊，要小心。
Thanks for the warning. Okay. I'll see you around. See ya.
多谢提醒。好。回见了。再见。
I'm dressed like a slob today, too.
我今天也穿得像邋遢鬼似的。
Oh, mimicry. I enjoy mimicry. I've been working on Admiral Ackbar from Return of the Jedi.
噢，模仿。我爱模仿。我一直在模仿绝地武士归来的阿克巴。
It's a trap. You have to imagine me with a giant squid head. It's a trap
这是个陷阱。你得想象我有个巨大的乌贼脑袋。是个陷阱...
Congratulations, I see you did your laundry.
恭喜啊，你衣服洗好了。
Well, sort of. How does one "sort of..." I bought new clothes, okay?
呃，算是吧。怎么叫算是……呢？我买了新衣服好了吧？
Is Leonard around? He's upstairs at Alicia's.
兰纳德在吗？他在楼上艾丽西纳那儿。
All right, that's cool, no biggie. He said he'd help me set up my printer, but I guess I can wait. What exactly is he doing up there?
好吧，没事，没什么大不了。他说他会帮我装打印机的，不过我想我可以等等。他究竟在上头干什么呢？
In what I can only perceive as a tactical move to destroy me, he is with Wolowitz and Koothrappali setting up her stereo.
我只能理解为是，用来摧毁我的战略行动。他和沃勒威茨还有库萨帕里在帮她装音响。
Oh, they're all up there, huh? Hmm, typical. It's axiomatically atypical.
噢，他们都在上头哈？正常啊。显然不正常啊。
Up until recently, they did not know Alicia, and had no encounters with her in a previous location.
直到最近他们还不了解艾丽西纳，以前也没有在哪儿见过她。
They never went upstairs to visit the former tenants, so your characterization of their behavior as "typical" is demonstrably fallacious.
他们从来不上楼去看以前的房客，所以你将他们的行为归为正常绝对是谬论。
Okay, now I see the giant squid head. Oh, great! Now, I have to start all over again.
好了，现在我看见巨型乌贼脑袋了。这下好了，我得从头再来一遍。
Yeah, I thought about renting this apartment, but I'm really more of a "downtown loft" kind of guy.
没错，我还想租下这间公寓呢。但我更像城里住跃层的黄金单身汉。
Cool. So are you in a loft now?
真酷，那么说你现在住跃层了？
Oh, actually, I'm, uh, living with a woman in Altadena. Purely platonic. She's also my maid.
噢，实际上我现在和一个女人一起住在阿塔迪纳。纯柏拉图式的，她也是我的女仆。
Sounds like a sweet deal. I won't lie. It's pretty dope.
听起来不错啊。我不会撒谎，她比你差远了。
Hello? Hey, I just wanted to bring you a little housewarming gift.
嗨。嘿，我想给你带来点乔迁之喜的薄礼。
That is so sweet. Come on in. Let's open it. Great.
你太贴心了，快进来吧，我们打开尝尝。好极了。
Nice dress. Oh, this? I'm dressed like a slob today.
裙子很漂亮。哦，这条？我今天穿得像邋遢鬼似的。
The guys have been helping me set up my sound system.
他们在帮我组装音响系统，
I've never had such good-looking technical support.
我从未见过这么酷的技术人员。
Oh, pish-posh. I don't know, it means shucks. "Shucks" means shucks. Let one go once in a while.
噢，哪里哪里。管它呢，就是不怎么酷的意思。不酷就是不酷嘛，别总那么较真成不。
Hey, uh, Penny, you want to hear something awesome? Yeah. Alicia is an actress, just like you.
佩妮，有个消息很赞，想听不？说啊。艾丽西纳是个演员，和你一样。
That is so awesome. Well, trying to be, but it's so hard.
真太赞了。努力做演员，但真的很难啊。
Yeah, I know, tell me about it. I've been out here three months, and all I've gotten is a couple of national commercials and this recurring thing on a soap.
我了解，还用说嘛。我已经来这儿三个月了，只不过接了几个商业广告和一部肥皂剧的循环角色。
That's why I work at the Cheesecake Factory. I'm holding out for the right part.
所以我一直在在酪饼工厂工作，在等好角色。
Alicia, what do you want as your default setting for DVDs, 5.1 Dolby or DTS?
艾丽西纳，你要怎样默认设置DVD，杜比5.1还是DTS？
Whatever you think is best, cutie. Well, DTS has more low end, so...Okay.
你认为哪个好就设置哪个吧，酷哥。DTS有更多低档环绕扬声器，所以……好吧。
Uh, hey, guys, guys, you will really appreciate this. I read the best science joke on the Internet. Alicia, you won't get it, but it's right up their alley.
嘿，伙计们，这个你们肯定爱听，我在网上读到个爆笑科学笑话。艾丽西纳，你不会理解的，但很对他们胃口。
Anyway, so, this physicist goes into an ice cream parlor every week and orders an ice cream sundae for himself, and then offers one to the empty stool sitting next to him.
就是说呢有个物理学家每周都会去一家冰淇淋店给他自己点一份冰淇淋圣代，然后给他旁边的空位点一份。
This goes on for a while until the owner finally asks him what he's doing. The man says, "Well, I'm a physicist, "and quantum mechanics...
这情况持续了一段时间，直到最后老板问他在干嘛，那家伙说我是个物理学家，根据量子力学理论...
