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Wow, are these Amy's?
这些是艾米的?
Kind of trashy—good for her.
有点恶俗，不过她穿倒不错
Those are Howard's.
这是霍华德的
Why are you washing Howard's man panties?
你为什么要洗霍华德的小内内?
Because if I don't, he won't give my paper to Stephen Hawking.
因为如果我不洗，他就不把我的论文给霍金教授
He's a famous physicist. Yeah, yeah, I know, he's the wheelchair dude who invented time.
霍金是个着名的物理学家。我知道，他是个发明时间的轮椅男
That's close enough.
很接近了
I don't understand, why doesn't Howard just introduce you to the guy?
我不明白，霍华德怎么，不直接把你介绍给他呢?
Because he's punishing me for being a "condescending jerk."
因为他觉得我是个"傲慢的混蛋"
You don't think I'm condescending, do you?
你没觉得我傲慢吧?
Well, kind of... Oh, I'm sorry, condescending means... I know what it means.
这个嘛...对不起，傲慢的意思是...我知道什么意思
And yes, you love correcting people and putting them down.
是的，你喜欢纠正并且贬低别人
Au contraire. When I correct people I am raising them up.
正相反。我纠正人时，是在帮他们提高
You should know, I do it for you more than anyone.
你应该知道呀，我帮你帮得最多
Come on, you do it to feel superior. I see that twinkle in your eye when someone says "who" instead of "whom", or
算了吧，你这样做，只是为了找优越感，有人语法用错时，我都能看到你的眼睛放光，或者
thinks the moon is a planet.
有人认为月亮是颗行星
Or Don Quixote is a book about a donkey named Hotay.
或者认为"唐吉坷德"是，讲一只叫Hotay的驴的故事
See, there it is, there's that twinkle.
看，就是这样，你现在就放光了
Well, I can't help it.That's an involuntary twinkle.
我也没办法啊，这是不由自主的
What do you want me to tell you, Sheldon?
你想让我对你说什么，谢尔顿?
I want you to tell me that Howard is being mean to me for no reason.
我想请你对我说，霍华德正在无缘无故地折腾我
Fine, Howard is being mean to you for no reason. I knew it.
好吧，霍华德在无缘无故地折腾你。我就知道
What's the matter? Every time I spend the night, your mom slaps me on the behind and says, "Go get 'em."
怎么了?每次在这过夜，你妈总要拍着我的后背说"好好干"
It's not her fault. She's getting hormone replacement therapy.
不能怪她。她在接受荷尔蒙替代疗法
Makes her crazy horny.
这让她欲火焚身
Check this out, I got Sheldon to wear the French maid's costume.
看这个，我让谢尔顿穿上了法国女仆装
Oh, my God, that's terrible.
天哪，这太不厚道了
Hey, I gave you first crack at it.
我都让你第一个看了
Why are you doing that? You're being mean to him.
为啥要这样啊? 你这样太坏了
He's mean to me all the time. You've heard him tease me about not having a doctorate.
他也一直这样对我啊，你肯定听过他，嘲笑我没有博士学位
If you don't want to get teased about that, get a doctorate.
要是你不想被嘲笑，就去念个博士学位呗
I have one; they're great.
我就有，感觉特棒
Oh, come on, the man torments me. I'm just letting him have a little taste of his own medicine.
得了吧，这家伙一直折磨我，我只是让他自尝下苦果
It's not the same thing.
这不是一回事
Sheldon doesn't know when he's being mean because the part of his brain that should know is getting a wedgie from the rest of his brain.
谢尔顿不知道他的话伤了你，因为他脑子中控制这一块的区域，已经被另一部分挤没了
Fine, I'll just make him do a couple more things, then I'll stop.
好吧，那我再让他干几件事就收手
No, you have to stop now.
不行，现在就得停止
Bernadette, I want to remind you, you promised to take me dress shopping tomorrow! Oh, damn.
伯纳黛特，我得提醒你，你答应明天带我去买裙子的!我了个去
I'm sorry, I can't make it, but Sheldon's going to go with you!
实在抱歉，我没法去，但谢尔顿会跟你一起去的!
And that's the last thing you do to him.
这是你要求他的最后一件事
Sheldon! I need your help!
谢尔顿!你得帮我下
What is it now, Mrs.Wolowitz?
又啥事啊，沃罗威茨夫人?
It's this dress!
这条裙子!
When I put my front in, my back pops out!
我前面一塞进去，后面就崩开了!
When I put my back in, my front pops out!
后面塞进去了，前面又崩开了!
It's like trying to keep two dogs in a bathtub!
就像要把两只狗都按在浴缸里!
What do you want me to do?
我能干什么呢?
We're gonna have to work as a team!
我们要团队合作!
Get in here, grab a handful, and start stuffing!
进来，搭把手，一起往里塞!
I'm not sure how to do this.
我不确定到底该怎么做
It's easy, just pretend you're putting away a sleeping bag.
简单，想象你在整理一只睡袋
Sleeping bags don't usually sweat this much, but okay.
睡袋通常不流这么多汗，我试试
Now zip me up.
现在拉上
Oh, if we squeeze you any tighter, you may turn into a diamond.
要是再把你挤紧点，你会变成钻石的（钻石在高温高压下形成）
You're right, who am I kidding?
你说得对，我这是自找麻烦
You should have seen me when I was young, Sheldon.
你真该看看我年轻时的样子，谢尔顿
The fellas used to line up and bring me boxes of candy.
男孩子们排着队送我，一盒盒糖果
Why did I eat it all? !
为啥我把它们都吃了!
Would you hold me?
抱抱我好吗?
Oh... no, you know, I'm not really the holding kind of...
算了，你知道，我这人不太喜欢...
Oh, guys, I just remembered.
各位，我突然想起来
I got you some Hawking souvenirs.
我给你们带了点，霍金的小纪念品
What are these? Gears and springs from his wheelchair. Pretty cool, huh?
这些是啥?他轮椅上的齿轮和弹簧，超酷的，对吧?
Wow, that's amazing. Yeah, I made an adjustment on the motor drive and when I was putting it back together
好神奇。对啊，我调整了下驱动装置，再重新组装起来时
I could not for the life of me figure out where they went.
我一点也不知道这些要装在哪了
I did it. Had to go to three clothing stores, but we finally found a dress that could envelop your mother.
我成功了。去了三家商场，终于找到件能包起你妈的衣服
I should have sent you to the custom car cover place in Altadena. They have her pattern on file. Humorous.
我该送你们去，阿尔塔狄纳车罩厂的，他们有她式样的记录。真幽默
Now will you please present my paper to Professor Hawking? I don't know.
求你赶紧把我的论文，给霍金教授吧。不知道诶
Oh, for heaven's sake.
看在上帝的份上
I did your laundry, I pee-pee- proofed your belt buckles, I, I even sprained my wrist helping your mother lift her bosom.
我帮你洗衣服，帮你的皮带扣清了尿渍，帮你母亲托胸，我手腕都给扭伤了
All right, Sheldon, there's only one thing left I want you to do.
好吧，我要求你最后一件事
Don't worry, it's an easy one. Okay.
别担心，很简单的。好
Give me a compliment.
称赞我一下
Fine. You have very tiny hands.
好，你的手很小巧
No... about my job.
不，夸我的工作
I want you to tell me I'm good at what I do.
我想听你说，我很擅长我的工作
You're obviously good at what you do.
你显然很擅长啊
Well, then why are you always ripping on me?
那你怎么总是挖苦我呢?
Oh, I understand the confusion.
你这困惑我懂了
I have never said that you are not good at what you do.
我从没说过，你不擅长你的工作
It's just that what you do is not worth doing.
只是说你的工作没有存在价值
It's nicer than anything he's ever said to me. I'd take it and run.
这可比他说我的话好多了，要是我，早就回家偷着乐去了
Thank you, Sheldon.
谢谢，谢尔顿
Now will you give my paper to Hawking?
现在你能把我的论文，给霍金了吗?
Sorry, I can't. What, why not? I gave it to him three days ago.
对不起，不行。什么，为什么?我三天前就给他了
He was really impressed.
那给他留下了深刻印象
He wants to meet you.
他想见见你
All right, then.
那好吧
Thank you, Howard.
谢谢，霍华德
Please let Professor Hawking know that I'm available at his earliest convenience.
请转告霍金教授，只要他有空，我随时都能去
I thought he might be a little more excited. Give it a second.
我还以为他会更兴奋点呢。稍等片刻
Professor Hawking, it's an honor and a privilege to meet you, sir. I know.
霍金教授，能见到您，真是无上的荣誉。我知道
I want to thank you for taking time to see me.
我想谢谢您能抽时间见我
My pleasure. I enjoyed reading your paper very much.
不客气。我非常欣赏你的论文
You clearly have a brilliant mind. I know.
你显然聪明过人。我知道
Your thesis that the Higgs boson is a black hole accelerating backwards through time is fascinating.
你认为希格斯波色子是，逆时间加速的黑洞，这观点很不错
Thank you. It just—it came to me one morning in the shower.
谢谢，我某天早上洗澡时，突然想到的
That's nice. Too bad it's wrong.
不错。可惜你错了
What do you mean wrong?
您说"错了"是什么意思?
You made an arithmetic mistake on page two.
你在第二页有个计算错误
It was quite a boner.
而且还很低级
No, no... that can't be right.
不，不，不可能啊
I-I-I don't make arithmetic mistakes.
我不可能有计算错误
Are you saying I do?
那你是说我错了?
Oh, no, no, no, of course not. It's just, I was thinking... Oh, gosh, golly, I made a boo-boo, and I gave it to Stephen Hawking.
不，不，当然没有，我就是，我认为...我滴亲娘唉，我真算错了，我还给史蒂芬·霍金看了
Great, another fainter.
得，又晕一位
