38. Learning how to apologize
学习如何用英语道歉
What are the hardest words to pronounce in English?
英语中,那些单词是最难说出口的?
It seems that "I'm sorry" are the two most difficult words for most people to say.
对于大多数人来说,“I'm sorry”是最难说出口的两个词。
Perhaps this difficulty lies in the so-called "losing of face";
也许它们难说出口的原因是涉及到所谓的“丢脸”。
when a person apologizes, he lowers himself before another.
当一个人道歉时,他就在他人面前降低了身段。
Yet no one is perfect; everyone makes mistakes.
是的,人无完人。每个人都会犯错。
After making a mistake, people should apologize to set things straight with others.
在出错之后,人应该直接向他人道歉。
Two phrases in English often confuse non-native users of this language.
在英语中,有两个短语经常困扰着非母语使用者。
These phrases are "I'm sorry" and "Excuse me".
它们是“I'm sorry”和“Excuse me”。
The latter is used to ask for information, as in "Excuse me, (but) do you have the time?" or "Excuse me, (but) can you tell me whether there is a postoffice near here?"
后者是用于咨询的时候,比如“Excuse me(打扰了),您现在方便么?”,又或者“Excuse me(打扰了),您能告诉最近的邮局在哪么?”
"Excuse me" is also used when it is necessary to disturb others, as when one person interrupts two others speaking:
当需要打断别人时,也可以用“Excuse me”。例如打断两个正在谈话的人:
"Excuse me for interrupting, (but) I have to leave now."
“Excuse me for interrupting(打扰一下),我现在必须得走了。”
Another example of the proper usage of this phrase is when, as a stranger, you want to point something out of benefit to someone, as in "Excuse me, (but) I believe you dropped something out of your wallet."
另外一种使用该短语的合适情形是,当你作为一个陌生人时,想为别人指出某件事情时。比如“打扰了,(但是)您的似乎是从钱包里掉了什么东西。”
Another common instance of using "Excuse me" is in crowded elevators, stores, or lines when a person needs to get through or get out.
另外一个使用“Excuse me”的常见情形是:在拥挤的电梯里、商店里、排队时,有人需要离开或者是穿过队伍。
"Excuse me, (but) this is my floor" is a very handy phrase to learn when in crowded elevators.
“Exucuse me(对不起),(但是)我到了。”,这在拥挤的电梯里是很管用的。
In all these cases, "Pardon me" may also be used; however, it is more often used in British than in American English.
上述情形中,“pardon me”也同样适用。但是,pardon me在英式英语中更为常见。
When is "I'm sorry" used? For more serious incidents.
什么时候使用“I'm sorry”呢?它适用于更为严重的情形。
Stepping on someone's toes on a crowded bus, though not intentional, should elicit an immediate "I'm sorry."
在拥挤的公交上,踩了某人的脚。虽然不是故意的,但也应该立刻说声“I'm sorry。”
Bumping into someone even on a crowded street where it is difficult not to also calls for "I'm sorry."
在拥挤的街头,撞了某人。虽然很难避免不撞人,但也需要说声“I'm sorry”。
Careless or late work in school or in the office requires out apology to teachers, colleagues, or employers.
在工作或者学习上的粗心大意、迟到,也需要像老师、同事或者职员道歉。
Being late for meetings or dates needs both an apology and often either a reason for the tardiness or an explanation of what course of action will be taken to eliminate any future possibility of recurrence.
开会、约会迟到了,道歉的同时还需要解释下原因,或者保证以后会尽量避免类似的情形。
No one likes to be wronged, intentionally or otherwise.
没有人喜欢被人误解,不管是无意的还是别的什么原因。
Saying "I'm sorry" can go a long way towards rectifying an awkward situation.
说声“I'm sorry”可以缓解尴尬的局面。
Even more importantly, saying "I'm sorry" is necessary when intentional harm has been done.
甚至更重要的是,当有意做了一些坏事,说声“I'm sorry”是很有必要的。
The borrowing of an item without first informing the owner---who later discovers the "theft" ---can be quite embarrassing.
比如:没有事先通知别人就将其物品借走—物主事后发现了“小偷”。这是一个很尴尬的情形。
A simple but sincere "I'm sorry" might repair the damage done.
一句简单但却真诚的“I'm sorry”可能会弥补之前的错误。
Careless comments or insults which offend others may be ameliorated with that simple phrase, though sincerity in voice and gesture make all the difference.
不经意间的评论或者无礼,激怒了对方。也许一句简单“I'm sorry”就能缓和情形。真诚的言行就能改变很多。
Similarly, young lovers, often exasperated in unrequited love, may purposefully hurt each other, only later to profoundly regret what they had done.
同样的,年轻人经常陷入暗恋之中。可能会有意地伤害对方,之后只有为自己所做的深感悔恨。
At these times, a heartfelt "I'm sorry" may redress the pain of the one inflicted by lover's arrows.
这个时候,一句发自肺腑的“I'm sorry”可能会减轻爱人刺痛心口的痛楚。
Even better, "Please forgive me" may be used, as it is considered a stronger expression of remorse.
甚至更好的,可以用“Please forgive me”。它包含了更强烈的悔恨情感。
Learning to apologize in another language does not excuse speakers from practicing the same good manners in their mother tongue.
在学习用其他语言的道歉的同时,学习者也应该学会用本国语言诚挚地道歉。
So many people lament the coldness of modern society; human relationships have been worn thin from constant urban pressures.
许多人责备当今现代社会的冷漠。人与人之间的关系由于城市压力变得越来越生疏。
Part of this problem seems to be that people no longer use such simple words as "please," "thank you", and "I'm sorry".
部分原因是人们不再使用这些简单的词语了,比如“请”,“谢谢”,“对不起”。
They cost nothing, but can bring a wealth of pleasure or relief to those who hear them.
这些话不会造成什么损失,但是它会给听者愉悦感、放松感。
They require little effort, yet these few syllables can enliven someone else's day.
它们只需要费一点点力,这几个音节就能激活他人的生活。
So, why not use them whenever possible?
所以当有可能时,为什么不说说呢?