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My name is Joshua Walters.
我叫约书亚·沃尔特斯。
I'm a performer.
我是名表演者。
But as far as being a performer, I'm also diagnosed bipolar.
但远在我成为表演者之前，我也被诊断为双向人格障碍症患者。
I reframe that as a positive
我把这病症重塑为一个积极方面，
because the crazier I get onstage, the more entertaining I become.
因为我在台上越疯狂，我变得更加娱乐化。
When I was 16 in San Francisco,
在旧金山当我16岁时，
I had my breakthrough manic episode in which I thought I was Jesus Christ.
我的突破躁狂症发作，那时我想我是耶稣基督。
Maybe you thought that was scary,
或许你想到那是很可怕，
but actually there's no amount of drugs you can take
但实际上你不用吃任何药丸
that can get you as high as if you think you're Jesus Christ.
你就可以爽得赛似神仙，好似你想到你就是耶稣基督。
I was sent to a place, a psych ward,
我被送到一个地方，精神病院，
and in the psych ward, everyone is doing their own one-man show.
在精神病院，每个人都在演着他们自己的独角戏。
There's no audience like this to justify their rehearsal time.
没有像这样的观众来证明他们的排练效果。
They're just practicing.
他们只是自己排练。
One day they'll get here.
假若有一天他们会站在这儿。
Now when I got out, I was diagnosed and I was given medications by a psychiatrist.
当我出来时，我被诊断治疗，我从精神病专家那儿得到一些药物。
"Okay, Josh, why don't we give you some -- why don't we give you some Zyprexa.
“好吧，乔什，我们为什么不给你开些--我们为什么不给你开些再普乐。
Okay? Mmhmm?
好吧？嗯？
At least that's what it says on my pen."
至少这就是我的笔要说的话。”
Some of you are in the field, I can see.
现场中的你们一些人懂得，我可以理解。
I can feel your noise.
我可以感受到你们的噪音和认同。
The first half of high school was the struggle of the manic episode,
高中的第一半学期是躁狂发作的艰难时期，
and the second half was the overmedications of these drugs,
下半学期是这些药物的过度滥用，
where I was sleeping through high school.
导致在高中时，我就在睡觉。
The second half was just one big nap, pretty much, in class.
下半学期只是一个大午睡，在课堂上非常过瘾。
When I got out I had a choice.
当我经历之后，我有了一个选择。
I could either deny my mental illness or embrace my mental skillness.
我本可以拒绝我的精神疾病，或者拥抱我精神上的巧妙之处。
There's a movement going on right now to reframe mental illness as a positive --
目前在进行着个运动要重塑精神疾病作为一个积极面--
at least the hypomanic edge part of it.
至少在它的轻度躁狂的边缘方面。
Now if you don't know what hypomania is,
现在如果你不知道什么是轻度躁狂，
it's like an engine that's out of control, maybe a Ferrari engine, with no breaks.
它好似一个不受控制的引擎，或许是一个法拉利引擎，没有刹车。
Many of the speakers here, many of you in the audience, have that creative edge,
这儿的许多演讲者，观众中的许多人身处过这种创造性的边缘，
if you know what I'm talking about.
那么你会知道我所讲的是什么。
You're driven to do something that everyone has told you is impossible.
你被驱动着做些事，每一个人都曾告诉你这事是不可能的。
