原味人文风情：
This is a story about Coleman Sweeney. Coleman, in short, was an asshole. Everyone in his small town knew it. It wasn't that he tried particularly hard to be unpleasant. It just seemed to come naturally to him. Coleman felt like the whole world owed him something, which caused him to regularly ignore the rules of a decent, acceptable society.
这是个关于 Coleman Sweeney 的故事。Coleman，简单地说，是个混球。他镇上的每个人都知道。不是说他特别努力要惹人厌。他似乎生来就是那德性。Coleman 觉得好像全世界都欠他，那使得他常常不管礼教社会的规范。
Wow. Really?
哇。有没有搞错？
And he hated anything that got in his way.
他讨厌任何挡他路的事物。
Go! You got it. You got it. Go! Go, go! You can do it!
走!你可以的。你可以的。走!走、走啊!你做得到的!
And small animals. Even to children, he was an asshole.
他还讨厌小动物。连对小孩子，他都是混账。
不给糖就捣蛋!
He was, as they say, born to it. But then, the strangest thing happened...something entirely unexpected-Coleman Sweeney died. A brain aneurysm-well, subarachnoid hemorrhage to be more specific. And it came as he argued over whether extra fries should be included in a 1.99 early bird breakfast, which was a typical Coleman Sweeney play. It was then that Sarah found something completely unexpected-Coleman Sweeney had registered to be an organ donor. Nobody knew what caused Coleman to do it, but there it was...generous and majestic. And that was the day that Coleman went from asshole to hero.
他是，如人们所说，天生混账。但后来，一件最古怪的事发生了...一件完全出乎意料的事－－Coleman Sweeney 死了。一颗脑动脉瘤－－嗯，更精准地说是蜘蛛膜下腔出血。那发生在他争辩 1.99 美元的早鸟优惠早餐是否该附薯条时，非常典型的 Colman Sweeney 把戏。就是那时，Sarah 发现一件完全想象不到的事－－Coleman Sweeny 有申请登记成为器官捐赠者。没有人知道是什么原因让他那样做，不过事实就摆在那...慷慨又伟大。而那就是 Coleman 从混球成为英雄的那天。
You see, his liver went to Stan, a father of two. His heart went to Miranda Morgan, who went on to teach for 25 more years. And his tendons went to Staff Sergeant Donohue, who was able to walk again and would never need to be pushed across the street by his physical therapist. And in a moment of small world irony, his corneas went to his 82-year-old next-door neighbor so that she could finally see the crap that her dog made in the side yard and pick it up.
你瞧，他的肝给了 Stan，一名有两个孩子的父亲。他的心脏给了 Miranda Morgan，她继续教了 25 年的书。而他的肌腱给了 Donohue 上士，他又能再次行走，再也不用让物理治疗师推他过街了。讽刺的是世界就是这么小，他的眼角膜给了 82 岁的隔壁邻居，这样一来她终于看得见自己的小狗在侧院拉的屎，并把它捡起来。
Yes, in life, Coleman was a bona fide asshole, 365 days a year, 24-7. But in death...well, let's just raise our middle fingers and shout, "Up yours, Coleman Sweeney! You're not an asshole...anymore."
没错，活着时，Coleman 是个不折不扣的混球，一年三百六十五天，全年无休。不过死后...嗯，就让我们竖起中指大喊：「去你的，Coleman Sweeney!你不是混球...再也不是了。」
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