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How do we know if people genuinely like us for who we are.
我们如何知道别人是不是真心地喜欢真实的我们。
No one wants to feel like they've been fooled into thinking a relationship is more than it actually is.
没有人希望感觉自己被欺骗了，以为一段关系比实际更有意义。
What makes it worse is when people send us mixed signals intentionally to make us fall deeper in love
更糟糕的是，人们故意向我们发出复杂的信号，让我们更爱对方
when in reality they aren't ready to be with us. But why would they do so?
而实际上他们还没有准备好要和我们在一起。但他们为什么要这么做？
Well, it could be because they like it when they know someone is head-over-heels for them.
可能是因为他们喜欢看到别人为他们神魂颠倒。
And even though they do not feel the same way about them, they would still string them along
即便他们不喜欢对方，他们仍然会继续欺骗对方
because it strokes their ego and they don't want to lose that admiration.
因为这会安抚他们的自尊，他们不想失去这种崇拜。
In this video, we hope to help you see some of the signs that you may be being led on
在本期视频中，我们希望帮助大家看一些你可能被哄骗的迹象
or perhaps you're doing the leading and want to stop that.
或者你就是那个在哄骗的人，并希望停止。
1. They might say I love you too soon.
1. 他们可能很快便会说我爱你。
Everyone knows that love at first sight is a real thing.
大家都知道一见钟情确有其事。
If someone tells you, they love you within five minutes of meeting you, do you think they are telling the truth?
如果一个人和你见面5分钟就说爱你，你觉得这是实话吗？
Think about the situation rationally, how much do they know about us in five minutes? What is it about us that they love?
理智看待这种情景，五分钟，对方能有多了解你？他们爱我们什么？
2. It's always about them.
2. 总是关于他们自己。
People who lead us on are likely to talk only about themselves.
哄骗我们的人可能只谈论他们自己。
This is because at the end of the day, people who engage in this behavior are pretty self-centered,
这是因为他们相当以自我为中心，
they don't care about how their self-serving behavior might hurt others.
他们不关心自己自私的行为会伤害别人。
In fact, they're probably leading you on just so that they can feel fulfilled from your love.
实际上，他们欺骗你可能只是为了从你的爱中得到满足。
Take note of how your conversations pan out and see how often your partner includes you in the discussion.
要注意你们的谈话是如何进行的并且看看你的另一半在对话中会提到你几次。
3. They're not sure what type of relationship they want.
3. 他们不确定自己想要什么样的关系。
At a certain point in a relationship, it's usually a good idea to figure out what each partners goals are.
在一段关系的某一时刻，弄清楚双方的目标通常是一个好主意。
Do you both want something casual or something serious? Maybe you two just want to be friends
你们两人是想要随便玩玩还是认真对待这段关系？或许你俩只想当朋友
but when you find someone who can never seem to decide what they want, it might be a sign they're leading you on.
但当你发现有人似乎永远无法决定他们想要什么，这可能是他们在哄骗你的迹象。
If someone is interested in a casual relationship, they should come out and say it ASAP.
如果某人只想要炮友关系，他们应该出来尽快说出来。
Letting the other person believe otherwise is manipulative and insensitive.
误导另一方的行为是冷漠的操控行为。
4. They're nice but it seems fake.
4. 他们很好，但看起来很假。
When someone leads you on in a relationship, their kindness may come and go.
当有人在一段关系中哄骗你，他们的善良飘忽不定。
In general, when someone is nice to you, it's sometimes pretty hard to tell if they're being genuine or not.
一般来说，当一个人对你很好时，有时很难判断他们是否真诚。
This is another big sign of someone who's leading you on. They're only nice when it's convenient for them.
这是他们在哄骗你的另一个重要迹象。他们只在自己方便的时候对你好。
If you want to learn more about how to spot a fake nice person, check out our video on the subject.
如果你想了解如何识别假好人，请观看我们的相关视频。
5. They're ghosting you.
5. 失联。
Ghosting is when people refuse to answer your texts or return your calls.
这是指对方拒绝回复你的短信或不接电话。
Ghosting can be very confusing especially in a relationship.
这一行为非常令人困惑，尤其是在恋爱关系中。
This is a pretty big sign that someone is leading you on.
这是他们在哄骗你的一个相当重要的迹象。
Even if they're busy, if someone really cares about you, they'll take a few seconds and reply to your text to let you know that they are.
即便很忙，如果真的在乎，就会花几秒时间回复你的短信，让你知道他们的在乎。
6. They play the victim.
6. 他们扮演受害者。
Manipulative people love to play the victim. Before you know it,
喜欢操纵别人的人很喜欢扮演受害者。在你认识到之前，
they've turned the tables on you and they make it seem like they're the one who's being abused in the relationship.
他们会扭转局面，让你觉得他们是在这段关系中被虐待的那个人。
This is classic behavior of someone who's trying to play with your mind, which is exactly what leading people on is all about.
这是他们试图玩弄你思想的典型行为，这正是哄骗的意义所在。
They might play the victim when something doesn't go their way or even when you accuse them of leading you on.
他们可能会在事情进展不顺意或在你指责他们哄骗你时扮演受害者。
Recognize if you're the one usually compromising and making sacrifices. Remember to appreciate your self-worth.
认识到你是不是那个经常妥协和做出牺牲的人。记住欣赏你的自我价值。
7. They might just be confused.
7. 他们可能也很困惑。
At the end of the day, people might be leading you on without fully realizing what they're doing.
他们可能自己也意识不到自己在欺骗你。
Not everyone knows what they want from a relationship right from the beginning and they might be torn between two worlds.
并不是每个人一开始就都知道自己想从这段关系中得到什么，他们可能在两个世界之间左右为难。
On one hand, they might want a serious relationship with you but there might also be an inner voice warning them against it.
一方面，他们可能想要和你展开一段认真的关系，但可能有一个内在的声音警告他们不要这样做。
They might just be afraid of getting hurt. This certainly doesn't excuse the behavior but it does potentially explain it.
他们可能只是害怕受伤。这绝对不是这种行为的借口，但却可以解释其原因。
Do these signs make sense to you? Have you ever been in a relationship like this?
这些迹象对你有意义吗？你曾经有过这样的感情吗？
If not, are you the one doing the leading and want to be more mindful?
如果没有，你是不是就是那个哄骗的人并想要多加留心吗？
Again, thank you for watching and supporting our channel.
感谢大家收看支持我们频道。
It truly means a lot to have you be a part of our journey.
一路有大家的陪伴意义深长。
