While writing the notes, I eventually realized why this task was the perfect antidote to my social feeds.
我在写感谢信时,终于意识到为什么这个任务是我浏览社交信息的完美解毒剂。
What was I actually doing when I scrolled through Facebook?
当我浏览脸书时,我到底在做什么?
Too often, I was spiraling into rage.
我大多数时候都是越来越愤怒。
Writing thank-you notes was time spent on something purely positive.
而写感谢信是把时间花在一些积极的事情上。
What was I doing when I scrolled through Instagram?
浏览Instagram时,我在做什么?
More often than not, I was admiring other people's lives—their beach vacations, their chubby babies, their organized kitchens.
我常常欣赏别人的生活,他们在海滩度假他们胖乎乎的孩子,他们井井有条的厨房。
Writing thank-you notes was an act of noticing and honoring my own life.
写感谢信是一种关注并尊重自己生活的行为。
After handing the first batch of notes to my neighbors, I spent a few days trying to remember times when other neighbors did something nice for me.
在把第一批感谢信交给邻居后,我花了几天时间试图回忆其他邻居为我做的好事。
And funny enough, I started noticing kindnesses that were happening in real time.
有趣的是,我开始注意到实时发生的友好举动。
There was the driver who waited for me as I bolted down the street to catch his shuttle bus.
我沿街狂奔赶班车时,司机会等一下我。
There was the cashier at Trader Joe's who chased me with a bag of groceries I'd left behind.
乔氏超市的收银员会追赶我,把我忘拿的一袋食品交还给我。
On the day I delivered that card to Trader Joe's, my mother-in-law, Louise, dropped off a week's worth of dinners.
在我把这张感谢卡交到乔氏超市的当天,我的岳母路易丝带来了一周的晚餐。
OK, I thought, Louise is not technically a neighbor.
我想,好吧,露易丝严格上来说不是邻居。
But if I was going to thank grocer Pete for three minutes of his time, I needed to acknowledge Louise for hours of hers.
但是,如果我要感谢食品杂货商皮特帮我的三分钟,我就要感谢露易丝花费了长达数小时的时间。
It was important for these months to be flexible, I decided.
我决定,这几个月保持灵活性很重要。
I would use each month's theme as a starting point,
我会把每个月的主题作为一个起点,
but I'd also watch for anyone going above and beyond, regardless of whether he or she fit into the monthly theme.
但我也会关注任何超出主题范围的人,不管他或她是否适合当月的主题。
So in the ensuing months, as I wrote to friends, doctors, career mentors, and parenting role models,
所以,在接下来的几个月里,当我写信给朋友、医生、职业导师和为人父母的榜样时,
I also dashed off missives to my husband, Jake, as well as my siblings, in-laws, and parents.
我也给丈夫杰克,以及兄弟姐妹、姻亲和父母发信。
And I found that doing so changed the fundamental dynamics of these relationships in small but impactful ways.
我发现这样做改变了这些关系中的基本动力,虽然改变很微小,但却很有影响力。
I was smoothing out any prickly bumps and buffing them to a new shine.
我正在解决与他们之间存在的问题,让关系焕然一新。
It is a powerful thing, I learned, to fully appreciate and feel fully appreciated by the people closest to you.
我意识到,去感激与你最亲近的人,并感受到那种感激之情是一件极具影响力的事。