Should We Diet in Order to Keep Fit?
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How Does It Feel to Lose Weight?
Here is a conversation between a heart specialist and a heart patient.
Vic: I've been feeling very lonely. I can't explain it, I'm in a crowd but I feel lonely. And so today, .I tried to get in touch with it . The loneliness and sadness are there because several things are going on. One, I don't like my body. Two, I am very angry with my body for having
heart disease.
Dean: Do you want to do an imagery exercisel?
Vic: Yes.
Dean: Okay, Please close your eyes and put yourself in a meditative state. If at any time you feel like this is not something you want to do, I'11 rely on you to tell me that. Begin by visualizing your
body. What kind of image do you get?
Vic: Just mounds of flesh. A wall of fat.
Dean: Imagine that your body has a voice of its own. Tell it hello. Ask it to just say hello to you, just to identify itself. Does it?
Vic: [pause] it says "hello" back. I'm amazedl Its voice is different from
mine.
Dean: Ask it if it has a name.
Vic: It says, "Fat ."
Dean: Ask "Fat" what is its purpose in your life.
Vic: [pause] It says, "To give me support. To shield me. To protect me."
Dean: Ask it what it is shielding you from.
Vic: It says, "From everyone. I'm your best friend."
Dean: In what way is it your friend?
Vic: It says, "I've been protecting you."
Dean: Ask it what it has been protecting you from.
Vic: It says, "You don't have to do a lot of things because you're fat. "
Dean: Ask it if it's protecting you from anything else?
Vic: [pause] Yes, it says it's been protecting me from my feelings.
Dean: Okay-ask it if it's protecting you from any feelings in particular.
Vic: [pause] It says, "From loneliness."
Dean: When it says that, do any other images or feelings come to your awareness?
Vic: Somehow I remember getting fat when I was seven. I see myself going into a room feeling like I was all right, and finding out I was not all right . So my life has been about justification. Justification
about being all right. Being accepted. So I used food as a friend. My fat says it protects me from feeling bad. I have a lot of resistance to change. I have a lot invested in this fat. And to give it up is like giving up a friend. It's been a barrier but it's also a friend. It's a friend that gets in the way sometimes, but it also serves me really well. But my size limits me in what I want to do now.
Dean: Stay with those feelings now. Ask "Fat" what it needs from you now.
Vic: [pause] It says that it needs to be told it's all right the way it is.
Dean: Maybe you could start by thanking it for shielding, protecting you from loneliness all these years.
Vic: [pause] All right.
Dean: Does the wall say anything in reply?
Vic: It agrees. It says, "It's about time."
Dean: Good. Now ask if it would be willing to open up, to stop shielding you all the time. If you could find a different way to shield yourself when you need it-one that is easier to open and close.
Vic: A replacement-is that what you are saying?
Dean Yes. Something that you could use to shield yourself when you need it, but isn' t there all the time when you want to open up. See what it says.
Vic: [pause] It says, "Yes."
Dean: Ask it what you need to do f or it to begin opening up.
Vic: [pause] To get massaged. To be, perhaps, more vulnerable. To allow myself to be touched.
Dean: What images or feelings come to mind of your body in that way?
Vic: I'd feel freer.
Dean: How would you look? Ask "Fat", the one that protects you and shields you, if it would give you a different image of your body. How your body would look if you were more open and less shielded all the time.
Vic: Okay.
Dean: What does it say?
Vic: [pause] If I'm willing, it's willing.
Dean: Good . W hat image do you see? You can always go back to the fat image if you need it.
Vic: I see a thinner body.
Dean: What does it look like?
Vic: It looks thinner. But it looks disfigured The fat is very disfigured.
Dean: How so?
Vic: It's full of stretch marks. Saggy skin.
Dean: Okay. What does that body have to say?
Vic: [pause] To try and attain it anyway. To try to achieve it. That it's okay to have a thinner body that' s not perfect.
Dean: Do any other images or feelings come to your awareness?
Vic: I feel uncomfortable and sad...