Oh, you look pretty sharp tonight, Earl.
厄尔,今晚打扮得很犀利嘛
You going somewhere special?
有什么特别的活动吗
Max, I am free black and 75.
麦克斯,我是位七十五岁的"黑"钻王老五
Who knows what the night will bring?
我的夜晚有无限的"可能"
Well, here's a twenty.
给你张二十
Can you break this the way you just broke my heart?
如你弄碎我的心般,把这钱弄成碎银子给我吧
Pop-pop.
一半,两半
Look at all this.
瞧瞧这堆钱
People really tipped us well tonight.
今晚大家小费给得真多呀
Yeah, well, don't get used to it.
是啊,不过年是不会天天过的
Thanksgiving is almost here,
等人们意识到感恩节的来临,
and as soon as people realize how much money they have to spend on holiday gifts,
自己得在礼物上花多少钱
their wallets snap tighter than Kim Kardashian's legs after the wedding check cleared.
他们的钱包就会像金·卡戴珊的两腿一样,一领完婚礼捞来的钱,就"夹得紧紧的"
I've always loved this time of year--spiced pumpkin lattes, bringing my winter furs out,
我喜欢每年的这个时期,香料南瓜拿铁,拿出我的冬日皮草
then bringing my winter furs to the dry cleaner's to get the red peta paint out.
然后拿着我的冬日皮草去干洗店,把人道对待动物协会泼的红漆弄掉
For me, it was jumping into a pile of leaves and finding a used condom.
节日之于我,就是跳进一堆叶子,像寻宝一样找一个用过的套子
What's up, children of the corn?
怎么了,玉米田的小孩
I will stay tonight and decorate diner for American holiday of Thanksgiving.
今晚我会留下熬夜装饰餐厅,为美国节日感恩节做好准备
I'm surprised you got the right holiday decorations.
我很意外你居然能拿对装饰物
Last month, you put out Easter bunnies for Yom Kippur.
上个月赎罪日,你居然把复活节的兔子给摆出来
So many Jewish holidays, I cannot Wikipedia them all.
犹太节日太多,我没空在维基百科上逐个搜
What, like I don't got a life?
笑屁啊,我的生活又不是只有这餐馆