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Oh, there you are, Ben.
你在这里啊，本。
Aunt Phoebe, what are you doing here?
菲比阿姨，你来这里做什么？
Well, I heard you're having a problem with one of the boys in your class.
我听说你跟班里的一个男生相处得不太好。
And so I thought I would just come down here and sit you both down, have a little talk and make it all ok.
所以我就想过来，让你们坐下来好好地谈一谈，把问题解决掉。
Now, the boy's name is Sting's son.
那个孩子叫做史汀的儿子。
Jack? I hate him. He's a jerk.
杰克？我恨他！他是个混蛋！
Now, Ben. Sometimes people may seem like jerks on the outside but they have famous fathers.
本，有时候人们外表看起来像是混蛋，但他们有个名人爸爸。
I have to go. My friend Doug is waiting for me over there.
我得走了，我朋友道格在等我。
Him, you're friends with.
你就跟这种孩子做朋友。
Excuse me, can I help you with something?
打扰了，需要我帮忙吗？
Yes. Yes you can, I'm looking for Jack's parents.
是的，我需要。我在找杰克的父母。
Are you with one of the students? Uh huh, I'm with Ben.
你是家长吗？ 我来找本。
Are you one of Ben's mothers?
你是本的妈妈吗？
I am one of Ben's mothers. I'm a lesbian. It was, it was difficult coming out to my parents.
我是本的妈妈。我是女同志。我爸妈很难接受这种事。
Well, hi. I'm Jenny Boon. I'm a new teacher here. I've only met your partner, Carol.
我是珍妮·布恩，新来的老师。我只见过你的另一半，卡罗尔。
Ah! Ok so, that would make me Susan.
那么我就是苏珊。
Right. Are you looking for Jack's parents to discuss the problems he's having with Ben?
对。你要找杰克父母讨论他跟本的问题吗？
Yeah, because I really do think the parents sit down together and have a conversation.
是啊，我觉得父母们应该坐下来好好谈一谈。
Yeah! Let's do that! That that sounds good. We should sit down and talk, just me, my lover Carol, and the Stings. Umm, now, how how will I get in touch with them?
对，我们就那么办吧！听起来很不错。我们应该坐下来谈一谈。我和爱人卡罗尔跟史汀夫妇。我要怎么联络他们？
Oh, their number's on the contact sheet.
联络簿上有他们的电话号码。
Uh huh. Uh huh. Umm, could could I get a copy of that? 'Cause Carol threw it out, she lost ours. She's such a scatterbrain, but man what a hot piece of ass.
能给我一份吗？卡罗尔把它丢了，她弄丢了我们的联络簿。她真的很糊涂。但天啊，她的屁股真是火辣性感。
You know, that party wasn't bad.
那场派对还不错。
Yeah. I didn't know there'd be dancing. That was a fun surprise.
对，我不知道还有舞会。那真是个大惊喜。
I don't see any uh, cabs. Maybe we should just walk?
我看不到计程车，或许我们该走回家。
Oh no, we can't walk.
不，我们不能走路。
It's like 15 blocks to the subway. Let's go.
怎么了，亲爱的，离地铁站只有15条街远，来吧。
Hey do you think we can get to the subway right there if we climb down that manhole cover?
你觉得我们可以从那个下水道孔直接爬到地铁站里吗？
What's going on?
什么事不对劲吗？
I can't walk, okay? Okay? These boots were a huge mistake.
我走不动了，好吗？买这双靴子是个天大的错误。
What?
什么？
Ok you were right! All right, I never should've bought them! They're killing me! One toe at a time!
你说得对，我不该买下来。害我的脚好痛，我的脚趾快断了。
So I was right. This is what it feels like to be right.
我说得对。原来"对了"就是这种感觉。
It's oddly unsettling.
我为什么觉得很不安。
How are we gonna we get home? Maybe a piggyback ride?
我们要怎么回家？背着走吧？
Hop on.
来吧。
Okay, wait, just give me a second. Let me just get my boots off first. Ah...Ooh...Oohh...Ohh...Oh God...Ohh...Oh...Ohh...Ohhhh...
好吧，等一下。我先把靴子脱掉。天啊。
Honey, I I know you're in pain right now, but I'm a little turned on.
亲爱的，我知道你很痛但我却来了性致。
Do you ever worry that you'll be walking and your baby will just like slip out?
你会不会担心走路的时候宝宝会掉出来？
What college was that, Dina?
你念的哪所大学，蒂娜？
Oh, my God. Bobby?
天啊，巴比？
Hi, Dina. Good to see you.
蒂娜，很高兴能见到你。
Joey, what are you doing?
乔伊，你在做什么？
Just what needs to be done.
我只是在做我该做的事。
Dearly beloved, we're gathered here... Oh Joey, this is crazy.
亲爱的亲友们，我们齐聚一堂…… 乔伊，这太疯狂了。
Don't interrupt me when I'm talking to God! Now where were we? All right, ok. Do you Dina, take this man... No!
我在跟上帝说话，别打断我！我们说到哪里了？你，蒂娜，愿意嫁这个人…… 不！
Oh you'll take him! No, I won't!
你得嫁他。 不，我不会嫁！
Hey! You don't get a say in this. Yes, I do.
这可由不得你。 不，我就愿意这样。
Ahhh! I heard "I do", we're halfway there! Ok! You!
我听到了"我愿意"，已经完成一半。再来是你。
All right, Joey, that is enough! Listen. As beautiful and moving as this ceremony is, it's not legal.
好吧，乔伊，够了！虽然这个婚礼既漂亮又温馨，但这是不合法的。
Okay. They they don't have a marriage license, they don't have any witnesses, and the groom only has on one shoe!
他们没有结婚证书，也没有证婚人，而且新郎只穿了一只鞋。
Yeah, he took the other one off and hit me with it.
对，他把另一只鞋脱了，用来打我。
Well what am I supposed to do?
我该怎么办？
You're supposed to realize that they are adults! And that they can make their own decisions.
你应该了解他们是成年人，可以自己做决定。
No they can't! They were stupid enough to get knocked up!
不，他们不能，他们笨到让自己怀孕！
Heyyyyy! Contraceptives are not always effective. Right?
预防措施不一定有效，对吧？
Yeah. We kind of didn't use any...
对，我们没有做预防措施……
Oh, come on kids! A little help here!
孩子们，别帮倒忙了！
Wow! This place is incredible!
这个地方真的很棒！
Sting's pen...that he gave to Phoebe.
史汀的笔……他送给了菲比。
Come on, secret passageway.
来吧，秘密通道。
Hi! Hi!
嗨。 嗨。
I'm Trudie. You must be Ben's mum.
我是楚蒂，你一定是本的妈妈。
Why else would I be here?
不然我为什么要到这里来呢？
Do sit down.
请坐。
I gather Jack and Ben haven't been getting along lately. Yeah.
我知道杰克跟本最近处得不太好。 是的。
I'm sure there are two sides to this story. But all I've heard is that Ben's a bit of a "poo poo head."
我相信这个故事一定有两面说法。但我听到的是本是个"大笨蛋"。
Umm, I'm sorry. Won't won't Jack's father be joining us?
抱歉，杰克的爸爸不会来吗？
Well, I'm sorry. Jack's father's not available.
对不起，杰克的爸爸没空。
Uh hmm. Ok. Well then, could we reschedule? For say, Friday night perhaps at 8 o'clock?
好吧，我们可以改约到周五晚上八点见行吗？
Oh no, I know that wouldn't work. My husband's in concert.
不，那样行不通。我丈夫要办演唱会。
Concert. Yeah. That does put us in...quite a pickle. Because you see I'm very busy before and after the concert, and he's obviously busy during.
演唱会。这让问题变得有点棘手。演唱会前后我都有事，演唱会的时间他又很忙。
So I guess you and I should talk about Jack and Ben right now.
所以我想现在你跟我该来谈谈杰克跟本的事。
Unless! Unless umm, ok I I would be willing to go to the concert, umm, all the while thinking about the children of course.
除非……我愿意到演唱会上……想一想孩子们的事。
Are you here for tickets?
你是来要票的吗？
Oh, thank you. Four would be great.
谢谢，四张就够了。
I'm not giving concert tickets to someone who uses their son like this.
我不会把演唱会门票送给这样利用自己孩子的人。
Oh there then you're in luck! Ben's not my son!
那正好，本不是我的儿子。
Look, I've just pressed a button triggering a silent alarm. Any minute now, the police will be here.
听着，我已经按下了静声警铃。警察随时会到。
The Police? Here? A reunion?
"警察乐队"？他们要来这？他们要复合了？
Okay, 10 blocks down. Five to go.
好吧，已经走了十条街，只剩五条。
Oh, wait! Stop! Stop! Stop!
等一下！停！停！停！
Oh, I'm sorry. Do you need a break?
抱歉，你需要休息吗？
My boots in tan! Can you get a little closer so I can see the price?
是棕黄色的同款靴子！你能靠近一点，让我看看价钱吗？
I can see it from right here. It'll cost you one husband.
我在这里就看到了，它会害你丢掉一个老公。
Okay, I'm sorry. I think I can walk the rest of the way now. Just just give me my boots.
抱歉，我可以自己走了。把我的靴子还给我。
I don't have your boots.
我没有拿你的靴子。
Well I don't have them either. Where are they?
我也没拿。那在哪里？
Well, why don't you check in one of my saddlebags while I chew on a bale of hay?
你为什么不去看看鞍囊里有没有，我先去吃点草。
Ok. God well, we gotta go back and get them!
好吧，天啊！我们得回去找靴子！
Honey, are you seriously ever gonna wear the boots again?
亲爱的，你还会再穿那双靴子吗？
Okay, I'll never wear them again. I just didn't get a chance to say goodbye.
好吧，我再也不会穿了。我只是还没机会说再见。
You know what? You can say goodbye to the tan ones.
你可以跟棕黄色的靴子说再见。
Okay. All right. Okay.
好吧。 好吧。
Bye, boots. Wait! Half off!
再见，靴子。等一下！打五折！
Joey, just because they're not getting married doesn't mean this is gonna be a disaster. Maybe they have a plan.
乔伊，他们不打算结婚不代表这就是件坏事。或许他们有计划。
Oh? Oh! Okay! Okay! Let's hear their plan! Now, what's the future look like for Dina and Bobby?
好吧，我们听听他们的计划。蒂娜跟巴比会有什么样的未来？
Well I really have high hopes for my band.
这个嘛……我对我的乐队期望很高。
You were right. He is funny.
你说得对，他是很好笑。
Hey, now wait a minute! I bet when you told people at first that you wanted to be an actor they laughed at you! Now come on Bobby, why don't you tell us a little bit about your band?
等一下。我敢说你一开始告诉大家你要当演员，大家都笑你。来吧，巴比，跟我们谈谈你的乐队。
Well, it's just me and my pal Rooster. The band's name is Numb Nuts.
团员只有我跟我朋友鲁斯特。乐队名字叫做"呆瓜"。
Really?
真的吗？
Dina, if you're having a baby, you should be married. Even if it is to Bobby. Dude, that's not a compliment.
蒂娜，如果你要生孩子，你应该结婚。即使是嫁给巴比。伙计，我不是在夸奖你。
No Joey! I knew you wouldn't be supportive!
乔伊，我就知道你不会支持我。
So whoa whoa whoa whoa! What're you gonna do? You're gonna have the baby and and raise it by yourself...without a husband? !
你打算怎么办？你要生下孩子，自己带大吗？没有丈夫帮你？
You can't be a single mother alone! You're gonna ruin your life!
你没办法当单亲妈妈，你会毁了自己的一生！
Oh excuse me! Am I ruining my life?
对不起，我在自毁人生吗？
No! No! No! It's different for you. You're so strong and together. You're not some dumb kid who doesn't know what she's doing.
不，你不一样。你很坚强独立。你不是不知道自己在做什么的笨小孩。
Excuse me?
你说什么？
One pregnant woman at a time, please!
我一次只能跟一个孕妇说话。
I just want you to be okay.
我只是希望你过得好。
So forcing her to marry Bobby is gonna make that happen?
逼她嫁给巴比，她就会过得好吗？
Maybe! Yeah! Yeah...so so uh, what kind of music does Numb Nuts Oh forget it! I can't!
或许吧。对，"呆瓜"主要做什么类型的音乐？算了，我办不到。
Joey, I am scared to death about this. But I really think I can do it, I'm just gonna need some help. And Bobby's gonna be here the whole time.
乔伊，这件事真的让我很害怕。但我想我办得到，我只是需要帮助。巴比也会一直陪着我。
You bet I am. And answer your earlier question, we're straight up gangster rap.
没错。至于你刚刚问的那个问题，我们唱纯粹的匪帮说唱。
Look, Rachel's told me how much easier you've made all this on her. Why can't you do that for me?
瑞秋告诉我你一直都很支持她。你为什么不能支持我？
Because! 'Cause… 'Cause you're my baby sister!
因为！因为……因为你是我的宝贝妹妹！
And you're my big brother! I mean, you're my favorite guy in the whole world. I'm not even scared to tell mom and dad. I was scared of telling you.
你是我哥哥。我是说，你是我全世界最喜欢的人。我甚至不怕告诉妈妈跟爸爸。我害怕告诉你。
Well I'd be scared of them, but all right.
我也会怕他们，但好吧。
Joey, I can't stand the thought of having this baby with you mad at me. I want him to have his uncle. Is my baby gonna have his Uncle Joey?
想到你会因为我怀孕而生我的气，我就受不了。我要他有舅舅。我的宝宝会有乔伊舅舅吗？
Of course he's gonna have his Uncle Joey.
他当然会有乔伊舅舅。
We're gonna be all right. I mean, even if we're not married this baby is gonna be so loved. And not just by us.
我们会没事的。即使我们没结婚，宝宝还是会得到宠爱。不只是我们会爱他。
That's right. By his uncle too.
没错。他的舅舅也会爱他。
And by you.
还有你。
Okay, Bobby, why don't we just come over here and let them have a little moment, okay?
巴比，我们还是过来让他们独处一下吧。
Come here.
过来。
No, seriously, what's wrong with you?
不，说真的，你到底有什么问题？
You're gonna love me so much. I got Sting tickets!
你一定爱死我了。我弄到史汀的门票了！
Oh, my God, I do love you! How did you do it?
天啊，我真的爱你！你怎么办到的？
Well, let's just say: Rose can!
就说，罗斯真厉害！
Where are the seats? Middle balcony.
座位是哪一区？ 在中间包厢。
Okay. Would you say that's more than 50 yards away from Sting, his wife or a member of his family?
我们的位置离史汀、他太太还有他的家人超过50码吗？
Yeah. Then that's not breaking the law. I'm there!
对。 那样就不犯法。我可以去！
