The Age-Old "I'm Just Not Ready" Excuse
古老的“我还没准备好”的借口
Dear Greg, I've been dating a guy since I was twenty-three. I'm twenty-eight now.
亲爱的格雷格,我23岁开始和一个人恋爱,到现在28岁了。
We started talking about marriage two years ago, and he said he wasn't ready.
我们2年前开始谈婚论嫁,他说他还没准备好。
So we moved in together to help him get "ready."
所以我们搬到一起住来帮助他“准备好”。
We talked about it recently and he said that he still wasn't ready.
我们最近又谈了谈,但是他说他还是没准备好。
He reminded me that we're young and we still have a lot of time and there's no need to rush.
他提醒我说我们还年轻,我们还有很多时间,没必要着急。
In a way, he's right. I'm only twenty-eight and people get married much later these days.
在某方面他说的没错。我才28岁,人们现今结婚的越来越晚了。
And sometimes it takes longer for guys to grow up than girls.
有时候男人比女人更晚成熟。
So I want to be understanding, but I'm just not sure how long I'm supposed to wait.
所以我想理解他,但我只是不确定我要等多久。
Does he need more time or is he just not that into marrying me?
他是需要更多时间还是只是不那么想跟我结婚?
Signed Danielle
丹妮尔
Dear Waiting at the Altar, He's right. Why rush? It's only been five years.
亲爱的等待在圣坛的你,他是正确的。为什么要着急?只有五年而已。
He's going to know you so much better after ten.
他会在10年后更了解你。
And you have all the time in the world, right?
你有全世界的时间,不是吗?
You know, in case after ten years he decides he's still not ready.
你知道,以防他在十年后还是没准备好。
I hate to tell you this, but here's why he feels rushed: He's still not sure you're the one.
我讨厌告诉你这个,但这是他为何会觉得匆忙的原因:他还不确定你就是他的真命天女。
Yep, my lovely, I know it's hard to hear, but better to hear it now than ten years from now.
是的,亲爱的,我知道这很难接受,但是现在听总比10年后听到要好得多。
So you can stay with him and continue to audition for the part of his lucky wife, or you can go find someone who doesn't need a decade or two to realize you're the best thing that ever happened to him.
所以你可以继续和他在一起,进行成为他幸运妻子的面试,或者找一个人,他不需要10年或20年来发现你是他人生中最美好的存在。
XOXO Greg
亲亲抱抱,格雷格
I'm not ready. This is the most often used excuse in the world, but it always seems to do the trick.
我还没准备好。这是世上最常用的借口,但这把戏总是能奏效。
Women love waiting around for men to be ready.
女人们喜欢等待男人们准备好。
You women must enjoy it, because you do it so much of the time.
你们女人一定很喜欢这样,因为你们大多数时间都在这么做。
Which is ironic to me, since you're the ones with the biological clocks that are supposedly ticking away.
这在我看来很讽刺,因为你才应该是嘀嗒响着的生物钟。
Listen, we all know that couple who's been dating for five years...eight years and still hasn't gotten married.
听着,我们都知道有的情侣恋爱5年或8年都没结婚。
We know it never works out well for that couple.
我们知道这样的情侣间进展的并不好。
So how about you stop waiting—and start looking for that guy who can't wait to love you.
所以为何不停止等待呢?开始寻找一个等不及去爱你的人。