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The four types of love, which one are you?
爱有四种类型，你是哪一种?
The idea of a soulmate is one found throughout all of popular culture.
在所有流行文化中都有灵魂伴侣的说法。
For example the idea you could meet someone on a train and fall in love instantly.
例如，你会在地铁碰到某人并迅速坠入爱河的想法。
Let's remove those rose tinted glasses that romanticize love and take a look at soulmates in a more scientific light.
让我们抛开那些让爱变得浪漫的玫瑰色玻璃，从一种更科学的角度看看所谓的灵魂伴侣。
Dr. Helen Fisher who is a research professor of anthropology has studied human love for years.
海伦·费舍尔博士是一名人类学研究教授，从事人类爱的研究多年。
She's made groundbreaking discoveries about who people are as lovers and the love they seek as a result.
她对情侣和寻求爱的人进行了开创性研究。
There are four love types that she discovered:
她发现爱有四种类型：
the Explorer, the Builder, the Director and the negotiator.
探险家、建筑者、导演型以及谈判者。
Explorers are dominant in dopamine; builders are dominant in serotonin;
探险家在多巴胺中占据优势；建筑者在血清素中占据优势；
directors are dominant in testosterone and negotiators are dominant in estrogen.
导演型睾酮中占据优势、谈判者在雌性激素中占据优势。
Based on a chemical makeup, it also shows in our personality characteristics, habits and lifestyle preferences.
基于化学结构，其还显现于我们的人格特征、习惯以及生活方式的偏好之中。
Explorers are often associated with words like adventure, spontaneity and fun,
探险家通常与冒险精神、自发性以及有趣等词相关联，
because their chemical makeup is predominantly dopamine,
因为他们的化学结构主要是多巴胺，
these people seek a playmate in their lover, they see life as one big great adventure and want someone to join the minute.
这类型的人会寻找玩伴作为情侣，他们将生活视为一次巨大的冒险并希望伴侣能够加入其中。
They are highly impulsive and curious.
他们非常冲动且求知欲强。
High dopamine levels also influenced Explorer types to be motivated and goal-oriented
高水平的多巴胺也影响了探索家成为积极且追求目标的人
because they are linked to enthusiasm, energy, focus and assertiveness.
因为他们常与热情、活力、焦点以及魄力相关联。
Explorers often tend to be attracted to other explorers, while that sounds easy enough.
探索家们通常易于相互吸引，虽然这听起来非常容易。
When two explorers come together and sparks ignite with two bold hearts on fire
当两名探险家结合在一起，两颗大胆的心迸发出火花
if they don't learn what patience is down the road, it is common for the two explorers to get in a head-on collision.
如果他们在爱之旅中没有学会耐心，通常这两名探险家会产生正面冲突。
This can result in messy breakups.
这可以导致混乱的分手。
Builders are often associated with words like family, honest and loyalty
建筑者通常和家庭、诚实和忠诚等词相连
because their chemical makeup is predominantly serotonin.
因为他们的化学结构以血清素为主导。
These people seek a helpful lover.
这些人会找一名助手情人。
Serotonin generates caution because it suppresses dopamine levels,
血清素要引起警告，因为血清素会抑制多巴胺的水平，
therefore, builders are relaxed, social, steady and family and community oriented.
因此，建筑者是以轻松、社交、稳定、家庭以及社区为导向的。
They are natural networkers and respect rules and authority in society.
他们是天生的沟通者，他们尊重社会中的规则和权威。
Builders are natural planners and like to schedule things ahead of time.
建筑者是天生的规划师，喜欢提前做规划。
They have an eye for detail in our linear in the way they do things in a step-by-step fashion.
他们善于了解细节，喜欢按部就班的做事。
Builders are often attracted to other builders.
建筑者间通常相互吸引。
These couples are often the high school sweethearts you hear about who are still married 60 years later.
这些情侣通常是那些高中就在一起的恋人。
Well, that sounds idealistic that doesn't mean builders don't have their fair share of obstacles
这听起来很理想化，但这并不意味着建筑者们就没有需要
to overcome in their relationships.
在情侣关系中去克服的障碍。
For instance, because builders can be set in their rules, schedules and traditions,
例如，因为建筑者会被设定在他们的规则、安排和传统中，
two builders may bicker over what they perceive as the right way of doing things.
两名建筑者可能会为了被他们视为是做事的正确的方法而争吵。
It is important for builders to keep an open mind and learn the value of flexibility
对于建筑者说，如果他们想要彼此的关系能够成长进化的话
if they want their relationships to grow and evolve.
保持开放的思维并学习灵活性的价值很重要。
Directors are often associated with words like nerd, ambition and challenge
导演型常与呆子、野心和挑战相联系
because their chemical makeup is predominantly testosterone.
因为他们的化学结构以睾酮为主导。
These people seek a mind mate in their lovers.
这些人会寻找心灵伴侣。
Directors are straightforward, tough minded and decisive.
导演型十分坦率、意志坚强且果断。
They value logic, therefore, when making decisions they are not easily swayed by emotions.
他们重视逻辑，因此，当做决定时他们不会为情感所影响。
Directors enjoy competition and are pragmatic, focused and daring.
导演型享受竞争，他们很实际、专注且有勇气。
They are also highly ambitious and can be so independent that they can come off as lone wolves.
他们也雄心勃勃，非常独立，给别人一种单独行动者的感觉。
Directors have excellent spatial skills and musical and athletic ability, too.
导演型有非常出色的释义视觉以及音乐和运动能力。
Directors rarely ever go for other directors instead they go for their opposite mates which is the negotiator,
导演型很少去找同类型人做伴侣，相反他们会找反类型的谈判者，
this is because directors lack the verbal and people reading skills
这是因为导演型缺乏言语表达以及阅人能力
negotiators naturally possess that helped attract them to one another.
而谈判者天生拥有这些能力能够帮助吸引导演型。
Although the director and negotiator typically make a good pairing, problems can still arise.
虽然导演型和谈判者是典型的相互搭配，却还是会出现问题。
Directors for instance, have workaholic tendencies and may neglect to spend quality time with negotiators and their family.
例如，导演型有工作狂倾向，可能会忽视陪伴谈判者和他们家人的黄金时间。
Negotiators are often associated with words like kindness, empathy and sensitivity
谈判者通常和仁慈、同情心和敏感等词相连
because their chemical makeup is predominantly estrogen, they seek a soul mate in their lover.
因为他们的化学结构是以雌性激素为主导，他们会找灵魂伴侣。
Negotiators are known to be the philosophers out of the love type group
谈判者是四种类型中尽人皆知的哲学家
because their high estrogen level provides for web thinking.
因为他们的高雌激素水平有助于网络思维。
This helps them connect a vast array of ideas, concepts and theories with one another
这有助于他们将大量的想法、概念和理论和别人相连接
as well as think naturally in an abstract manner and provide them with a vivid imagination.
并以一种抽象方式自然思考，为他们提供了一场生动的想象。
As a result, this makes them habitual daydreamers.
因此，这使得他们成为惯性空想家。
Negotiators are highly intuitive individuals relying on their gut feelings often because they are natural feelers.
谈判者是凭直觉的人，他们常依赖于他们直觉，因为他们是天生的试探者。
However, negotiators can experience problems in their relationships when they dwell on casual comments and criticisms.
然而，当他们在细想平常的言论和评论时，谈判者可以感受到他们关系之间的问题。
They tend to take them personally and can cause them to hold grudges for months or even years.
他们易于将这些当成个人恩怨，导致他们心怀怨恨长达几月甚至几年。
Negotiators are also susceptible to depression and can overdo it when they constantly feel lost.
谈判者也非常容易抑郁，当他们感到怅然若失时，通常会出现过火的行为。
Always on the search for themselves, they can become overly self-absorbed, self-conscious and self-critical.
他们总在寻找自我，他们可以变得过度自私、 不自在以及自我批评。
Although these love types are more likely to be attracted to certain types of lovers over others,
虽然这些类型的人会更易于在四种类型中相互吸引，
the truth is that any love match can work, so long as the two members are mature enough
事实上任何匹配的爱都是有可能，只要两个人足够成熟
and willing to cooperate with one another and work with each other's differences.
并愿意和对方合作，弥补彼此偏差。
Despite the important research Dr. Helen Fisher conducted, we still know only a speck about love,
虽然有海伦·费舍尔博士引导，我们仍然对爱了解甚少，
it is still such an enigmatic concept that cannot be fully explained even in the utmost scientific way
爱仍然是科学方式所比无法完全解释的神秘概念
because after all people often end up falling in love with those whom they least expect to end up with.
因为毕竟人们通常最终会爱上那些他们最不期望的人。
Ultimately, in relationships it's about constantly choosing your partner over and over again and kindness.
最后，情侣关系就是一遍又一遍地挑选伴侣。
If you find yourself in a disagreement with your partner,
如果你发现自己和伴侣间出现分歧，
pick up the phone or drive over to their place, swallow your pride and apologize.
就拿起电话或是开始去他们家，收起你的傲气然后道歉。
Ask yourself, 'is this really worth losing someone over'.
问问你自己，‘失去这个人真的值得么’
The sad reality is that things are always fleeting but the things you do have control over make those moments count.
悲惨的现实是事情总是短暂的，但那些你可以控制的事情让这些时刻变得重要。
What are your thoughts on love and the four love types?
对于爱和它的四种类型你怎么看？
Be sure to leave your comments below and follow the link in the description to find out which love type you are.
请在下方评论留言，点击下方链接看看自己是哪种类型。
As always, if you enjoyed this video, be sure to like and subscribe to see more content from Psych2Go.
如果你喜欢本期视频，请点击喜欢并订阅Psych2Go观看更多内容。
