评论
打印
Have you ever heard the expression old soul?
你听说过老灵魂么？
You know that one friend who instead of going to a rager of a party,
就是那种朋友，相比参加疯狂的聚会
they'd rather have a couple of drinks with a few good friends,
他们宁愿和三两好友喝上几杯，
sometimes not even drinks but just coffee, and sometimes not even coffee but tea?
有时甚至不喝酒只喝咖啡，有时甚至咖啡都不喝，只喝茶？
You know grandmas in disguise, the old souls.
你知道伪装在年轻躯体中老灵魂。
The term actually has no base in psychology and the interpretation of a change is from person to person.
这个术语事实上是没有心理学依据的且其变化的解释也是因人而异。
For some people, it means somebody mature beyond their age,
对一些人而言，这意味着那些有着超乎年龄般成熟的人。
for others, someone who's gone through many different reincarnations of life,
对其他人而言，这是指那些经历过不同转世再生的人
person who draws from their years of past life wisdom.
那些从过去的生活中吸取智慧的人。
To be clear, the idea of old souls has been debunked by science,
明确的说，老灵魂已经被科学揭穿，
however, some of the biggest believers of old souls are nurses who've delivered babies who don't cry at all,
然而老灵魂的最大信徒就是护士，这些护士在接生的时候发现有些新生儿完全不哭，
like the whole being born thing ain't nothing.
就好像根本不把出生当回事。
Being an old soul has its advantages but one disadvantage is trouble in relationships.
老灵魂有其优势但缺点就是人际关系中的麻烦。
First, old souls usually come from single-parent households.
首先，老灵魂通常来自于单亲家庭。
The thing about coming from a single-parent household is that kids may be forced to mature faster than others.
来自单亲家庭的孩子可能会被迫比其他人成熟地更快。
Having to deal with divorce is a very sobering experience that can make kids mature quickly.
处理离婚是一次非常发人深省的经验，会让孩子快速成熟。
However growing up in a single-parent household, they don't really grow up with a stable relationship present in their lives,
而单亲家庭的孩子，他们并不是成长在稳定的家庭关系中，
this means they can have trouble with their own stable relationships as they get older.
这意味着，长大后，他们会在自己的稳定情感关系中遇到麻烦。
There is a term that's close to old souls that has scientific basis.
有一个和老灵魂相似且有科学依据的术语。
Pseudo mature, this term refers to kids, teens and young adults who seem older than they are.
伪成熟，这个术语指的是那些看起来比实际年龄更加成熟的孩子、青少年和年轻人。
Pseudo mature kids are often the result of single-parent households and can be called old souls.
伪成熟的孩子通常是单亲家庭的成果且会被称为老灵魂。
Secondly, old souls prefer the company of older people
第二，老灵魂喜欢年长人的陪伴
because old souls feel older, they feel a disconnect with people their age.
因为老灵魂感觉自己的苍老，他们和同龄人有脱节的感觉。
Usually for the first couple of decades of your life, you're surrounded by a majority of people your age,
通常在你生命中的头几十年中，你会被大多数同龄人所包围
old souls usually end up hanging out with older people,
老灵魂通常都会和年长者约会，
so when they get into a relationship with someone their age
因此他们和同龄人约会时，
it's hard that old soul probably won't fit in with their partners friends.
老灵魂会和他们伴侣的朋友格格不入。
The other side of the coin is that they date someone older than them which brings its own problems of pushing social norms,
硬币的另一面就是他们和年长者约会也会带来社会准则的问题，
like what if someone dies well before the other.
比如，如果一个人先去世该怎么办。
Age difference also may cause problems when a couple tries to have kids.
当他们准备要孩子的时候，年龄差距也会引起问题。
All this and more can bring a lot of stress to a relationship.
所有这些会给这段关系带来很多压力。
The third thing with old souls is that they've got very high standards.
关于老灵魂的第三点就是他们有着非常高的标准。
Assuming they've lived many lives and been in many relationships,
假设他们活过很多世，经历过很多段关系，
they're subconsciously comparing their current relationship to their best past ones.
他们会潜意识的将现阶段的情侣关系和过去的那些段关系作比较。
They know what they want, this constant comparison can lead to a lack of satisfaction and stress.
他们知道自己想要什么，这种经常的比较会导致满足感和紧张感的缺乏。
Imagine remembering all the great loves of your life trying to get over those
想象一下，记得生命中所有的爱人并不断从关系中恢复
and simultaneously falling in love with someone else, it's hard
然后同时和其他人坠入爱河，这太难了
and their partners end up feeling judged and evaluated.
并且他们的伴侣会感觉受到别人指指点点。
This can lead to frustration for both parties.
这对两方来说都充满挫败感。
Sometimes they seem distant because they don't want to be hurt again.
有时他们似乎很遥远，因为他们不想被再次伤害。
As well they have a strong sense of identity.
同样他们有很强的认同感。
They're stubborn in their ways and they don't try new things.
他们非常顽固，不喜欢尝试新的东西。
Since they live so many lives, they've tried everything,
因为他们已经活过很多世了，他们已经尝试过所有东西，
they end up having a very well established personality as well.
他们也有很好的个性。
This can make dating hard when you keep trying to spice things up with new adventures but your partner seems uninterested.
这一点会让约会变得困难，因为当你想要为约会添加些新的冒险时，你的伴侣却完全不感兴趣。
It becomes very frustrating and difficult to deal with.
这种情况处理起来非常困惑且困难。
Fifth and finally, old souls have a very strong sense of purpose.
第五点也是最后一点，老灵魂有着非常强的使命感。
After years and years and different lives spent doing the basics but getting a job, getting married having kids, etc.
经历过几世的基本日常生活，找工作、结婚生孩子等，
old souls start to want more from life, to have one of their lives have an actual impact,
老灵魂开始想从生活中获得更多，想要生活有实际影响
to mean something like a legacy, what this means is that they are very driven people.
想要有意义的东西，如遗赠，这意味着他们是办事紧凑的人。
They have goals and want to do things that matter.
他们有目标且想要做一些重要的事情。
Sometimes that means that relationships take a backseat
有时这意味着情侣关系居于次要地位，
or sometimes you can feel like you're just some tool to their success,
或者有时你会觉得你仅仅是他们成功的某种工具，
on the other hand, it can be very inspiring to be in love with someone with goals,
另一方面，爱上一个有目标的人会非常振奋人心，
it's important to find a balance between the two.
在两者之间找到一种平衡很重要。
These are the five ways falling in love with an old soul can be hard but well worth it.
五种爱上来灵魂的方式很艰难，但却非常值得。
