1) What’s Said: “Maybe you’re not trying hard enough.”
What’s Heard: “This can come off sounding like you’re passing judgment on effort,” says Anderson. “It’s better to encourage a single person to explore new relationships to the extent they are comfortable and to extend themselves in ways that feel natural and not forced.”
说者:也许你没好好争取。
听者:你在贬低她的个人能力,你觉得她是个不上进的人。