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CHRIS ROCK: Everyone would agree that one of the most important
所有人都会同意一年中
days of the year is Mother's Day.
最重要的日子之一 就是母亲节
ALL: Happy Mother's Day!
母亲节快乐！
Oh, you guys didn't have to do this.
噢 你们不用这么客气的
Everybody wants to show their mama how much they love them.
所以人都希望向母亲们展示自己的孝心
Even 2Pac wrote a song about his mother.
连2Pac也写过一首关于他妈妈的歌 (注：即黑人嘻哈歌手Tupac)
On Mother's Day, people pull out all the stops.
在母亲节当天 人们百忙之中也都停下来
You take your mother to brunch...
带上妈妈去吃午餐
We're out of food.
东西都吃光了
I'm sorry for the inconvenience.
对一切不便深感抱歉
If you could just come back next Sunday.
希望你下个星期天再来光顾
What-What do you mean you're out of food? Next Sunday?
怎么会都吃光了呢？下个星期天？
We're out of food, Mama. What you want me to do?
我们的食物卖光了 老妈妈 你还想让我怎么办呢？
We take her to a great movie so she can wear
我们带妈妈去看场好电影 她就可以戴上
a great big hat...
一顶巨大无比的帽子...
and you spend your last dime on her,
而你在她身上花光了最后一毛钱
just so she knows she's number one.
只为了让她知道她是最最重要的
Oh, my God!
噢 我的老天！
Come on.
来吧
Oh, I can't believe you did this.
噢 不敢相信这是真的
But when it comes to Father's Day, nobody gave a damn.
然而到了父亲节那天 没有人当回事
It's Father's Day, people.
今天是父亲节啊 街坊们
Come on down to Pastures and Shores.
光临柏记餐厅
The food is half-price.
所有食物半价
Buenas noches. 緾omo se dice "half-off"?
（西班牙语）晚上好 全场半价 童叟无欺
The movies are terrible...
电影太可怕了...
Turn it off! Turn it off!
关掉它！关掉它！
...the gifts suck...
...礼物也很糟糕...
Ta-dah.
惊喜吗
What the hell is this?
这到底是什么？
It's a parking space, honey.
亲爱的 这是停车位
We got you a parking space.
我们送给你一个停车位
Better park and be happy.
好过什么都没有
And the only song for fathers was this.
唯一一首献给父亲们的歌是这样的
Oh, Papa was a rolling stone, my son, yeah
噢 老爹是块滚石 我的儿子
This year, I wanted to get my father the perfect gift,
这一年 我想送给我父亲一份最完美的礼物
and the only way to do that was to ask him what he wanted.
能达到目的的唯一途径 就是问他想要什么
Dad, what present
爸 你要什么
do you want for Father's Day?
父亲节礼物？
You want to get me something for Father's Day?
你想送我父亲节礼物？
You can help me knock off one of these bills.
你可以帮我付帐单
Julius...
Julius...
Okay.
好吧
Father's Day...
父亲节...
You know what?
知道吗？
Y'all really want to get me something for Father's Day?
你们真的想送我父亲节礼物？
I know exactly what I want.
我知道我要的是什么
What's that, baby? A day off.
亲爱的 是什么？ 放一天假
You mean a day off from work?
你指的是一天不上班？
No.
不
A day off from everything and everybody.
远离一切人和事的一天
No fighting, no shouting,
没有大吵大闹
no complaining,
没有抱怨
no fixing.
没有东西要修理
Just one day where I can do whatever I feel like doing.
只想要一个随心所欲的一天
I hope he doesn't want to leave us for a white girl.
希望他不是想为了一个白妞而抛弃我们
GREG: So, wait, your dad says he doesn't wananything?
慢着 你爸说他什么都不想要？
Nope. All he said was he wanted to be all alone.
不 他要说的是他想独处
You better watch out.
你最好多留个心眼
My mother said she wanted a day alone.
我妈说她想独处一日
The next thing we knew,
接着我们知道的是
she left and moved to Poughkeepsie.
她离家出走，搬去了Poughkeepsie （注：纽约上州的一个城市）
Well, I don't care what he says. I'm gonna get him something.
我才不管他说了什么 我会弄点什么给他的
CHRIS ROCK: My father said what he wanted.
我父亲说了他想要什么
My mother said what he was gonna get.
我母亲决定他将会得到什么
What kind of gift is a day off from your family?
从你家放一天假是什么礼物啊？
It's just one day.
只是一天而已
Well, how is that supposed to make the kids feel?
你让孩子们怎么想呢？
Women always used the kids against you.
女人永远会利用孩子 作为对抗你的终极武器
It's Father's Day and you don't want to be a father.
那是父亲节 你宁愿不当父亲
I did not say that.
我没有这样说
They're trying to honor you,
他们想敬爱你
and all you got to say is, "Leave me the hell alone."
而你却告诉他们：“别烦我！”
I did not say, "Leave me the hell alone."
我没说过“别烦我”
You may as well have.
说出你心里话而已
I haven't had a day to myself in 13 years.
这13年里我没一天属于自己的时间
If I didn't want to be a father, I...
如果我不想做一个父亲 我...
That look means if you want to keep beg a father
这个表情的意思是 如果你还想当爹的话
you better keep your mouth shut.
你最好闭嘴
It is supposed to be our day to do something special for you.
那天本该由我们为你做些特别的事
That's what I'm trying to say.
这就是我想说的呀
It's Father's Day.
那天是父亲节
Why can't I do what the hell I want to do?
为什么我就不能做我想做的事？
Huh? Say what?
你说什么？
Uh... you got the key?
呃... 你有钥匙吗？
Well, what you gonna do here all day by yourself anyway?
你整天一个人呆在这能干什么？
Nothing.
什么也不干
Well, can the kids at least get you a real gift?
孩子们起码可以送你一份实在的礼物吧？
What?
干嘛？
What's that?
那是什么？
Every Father's Day card and present
所有过去四年里
I've gotten for the past four years.
我收到的父亲节贺卡和礼物
Look at this.
看这个
A box of S-Curl.
一盒卷发膏
I got you that.
我送给你的
A macaroni cigar box.
软吸管装饰的烟盒
Oh, that's so cute.
噢 那多别致啊
I got four ties-- a neck tie
我收到四条领带———— 一条普通领带
a bow tie, bolo tie...
一个领结 饰扣式领带
I got him that.
我送给他的
...and a clip-on tie.
还有一个夹式领带
I don't even wear ties.
我从不戴领带的
I don't go nowhere.
一点用处都没有
That's $28.46 we could have used
那$28.46美元我们该花在
on something else.
其他地方
Well, it's the thought that counts.
心意最重要
I appreciate it, I really do,
我很感激 真的
but if you buy me presents,
但如果你真要给我买礼物
I'm just gonna have to work to pay it off.
我得拼命工作倒贴钱
At this rate, I'll be working when I'm dead.
以目前的情况来看 我得工作到我死那天为止
Julius, you're dead. What are you doing here?
Julius 你已经死了 你在这里干什么？
Trying to pay off these presents.
尝试付清这些礼物的钱
Listen, can I work the graveyard shift?
我可以在墓地上班吗？
