Chandler: Wait a minute, wait. You're telling me this actress person is the only woman you ever wanted who didn't want you back? !

Joey: Yeah! Oh my God! Is this what it's like to be you?

Monica: Wow, you're really crazy about her, huh? Oh, you have no idea.

And and when we're on stage I get to to kiss her and and touch her, but then she goes home with the director, and it's like somebody's ripping out my heart!

Phoebe: Oh, it's so great to see you feeling like this!

Ross: Hey! Hey!

Ross: Monica, uh Dad called this morning and ah, Aunt Silvia passed away.

Monica: Yes! ! Yes! Yeah yeah yeah!

Ross: We were all pretty shaken up about it.

Phoebe: Wait, am I missing something though? 'Cause I always thought death was supposed to be sad, in a way.

Ross: Well ah, Aunt Silvia was, well, not a nice person.

Monica: Oh, she was a cruel, cranky, old bitch! And I'm sorry she died. Did Dad say I get the dollhouse?

Ross: You get the dollhouse. I get the dollhouse!

Phoebe: Wow, a house for dolls, that is so cool! When I was a kid, I had a barrel.

Joey: Uh, Pheebs, you had a barrel for a dollhouse?

Phoebe: No, just a barrel.

Monica: You know what, you can play with my dollhouse. Really? ! Really? !

Monica: Any time you want. You know, when I was younger, all I wanted to do was to play with this dollhouse, but no! ! It was to be looked at, but never played with.

Chandler: My Grandmother used to say that exact same thing to me. More of a bathtub type of situation.

Ross: Now Monica, she did give you one chance. She told Monica she could play with the dollhouse if she lost 20 pounds.

Monica: Yeah, well, look who's losing weight now, Aunt Sylvia.

Rachel: Hey, Sophie! Hey, Rach! Hey. Hey. Thanks for lunch, Chandler. You know, you didn't have to walk me all the way back up here.

Chandler: Oh, that's that's ok, no problem.

Rachel: Um, honey you do realize that we don't keep the women's lingerie here in the office?

Chandler: Yes, I realize that.

Rachel: Summer catalog? ! That's the stuff!

Joanna: Rachel, I need the Versace invoice. Hello! You don't work for me.

Rachel: Joanna, this is my friend Chandler Bing Joanna.

Joanna: Bing! That's a great name.

Chandler: Thanks, it's ah, Gaelic, for 'Thy turkey's done.' So ah, I'm gonna go, nice, nice meeting you. You too. Bye, Chandler.

Joanna: So ah, what's wrong with him? Oh, nothing, he's just goofy like that, I actually, hardly notice it anymore.

Joanna: Oh no, no no no, I mean, is he ah, married, or involved with anyone?

Rachel: No! ! No! He's not married, or involved, with anyone!

Joanna: Oh, Rachel, actually, you know what, forget it.

Rachel: Well, I'll ask him for you, if you want me to? Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, you know something that Sophie would do?

Sophie: Uh, uh, uh, I am here. I know that.

Monica: Look at it! Ohhh! Wallpaper's a little faded, that's ok. Carpet's a little loose. Hardwood floors! !

Phoebe: Hey! Hello. Oh! Ooh! Oh Monica! It's so beautiful. I know! !!

Phoebe: So, I'm here, ready to play. Ok. I brought a bunch of stuff for the house, so check it out. Ha ha.

Monica: What's this?

Phoebe: That's a dog, every house should have a dog.

Monica: Not one that can pee on the roof.

Phoebe: Well, maybe it's so big because the house was built on radioactive waste.

Chandler: And is this in case the house sneezes?

Phoebe: No, no, that's the ghost for the attic.

Monica: I don't want a ghost. Well, nobody wants a ghost. But you've got one, because the house is sitting on an ancient Indian burial ground.

Ross: Wait a minute, the house was built on radioactive waste, and an ancient Indian burial ground? That would never happen.

Phoebe: Ok, obviously you don't know much about the U.S. government.

Rachel: Hey! Hello. I need to talk to you! Sure, what's up? ?

Rachel: Oh, sorry. I meant Chandler.

Ross: I I know. Well if something comes up.

Chandler: Oh, I'm glad you guys are past that little awkward phase.

Rachel: Ok, my boss, Joanna, when you left, she started asking questions about you.

Chandler: Oh ho, liked what she saw, huh? Dug my action, did she? Checking out the Chan Chan man!

Rachel: That was surreal. Ok, what do you think? Wou interested, at all?

Chandler: Yeah, she seemed cool, attractive. I'll do it. Oh thank you, Chandler, this is so great, she's gonna love me.

Phoebe: Ok, dinosaur attack! ! Quick, everybody into the house! ! Ahh ahh! Roof! Rrroof roof roof!

Monica: All right, Phoebe, you know what? That that's it, that's it, all right? No dinosaurs, no ghost, no giant dogs, ok?

They're not the right size, they're not Victorian, and they just don't go.

Phoebe: Ok, fine. Come dinosaur, we're not welcome in the house of no imagination.

Ross: Uh, Pheebs, while we're hovering around the subject. I just have to say dinosaurs, they they don't go, rrroof!

Phoebe: The little ones do.

Joey: Hey, Kate! Morning.

Joey: Listen, I ah, went to that restaurant that you were talking about last week. Hey, lovely! Come, talk to me for a minute!

Joey: And I ate the food, it was good, I had the fish, yeah. It was good, yeah.

Woman: Hi, oh, I'm Lauren, Kate's understudy.

Joey: Oh, hey! Joey Tribbiani.

Lauren: I know! I I'm a big fan of yours. What? !

Lauren: I used to umm, schedule my classes so I could watch Dr. Drake Ramorey on Days of Our Lives.

Joey: Get out of here, really? ! Absolutely! Yeah?

Lauren: Oh but then, they went and dropped you down that elevator shaft. They gave me the shaft all right.

Lauren: Oh, you're so funny. Listen, umm, what are you doing after rehearsal? Do you wanna get a drink, or something?

Joey: Well Ahh, yeah! Yeah, sure, a drink sounds great.

Lauren: Cool! I'll I'll see you then. All right.

The Director: All right, it's time to act, my talking props.

Ross: You know if you wanna make the boys' bathroom realistic you're gonna have to put some teeny tiny porno magazines behind the toilet.

Phoebe: Hey! Hey! Look everybody, look at my new dollhouse! ! Wow! !

Phoebe: Ha ha ha ha, look, look!

Ross: Hey, what's this? ! Oh, ok, it's the slide instead of stairs. Look.

Monica: Very interesting, Phoebe.

Rachel: What's this? The Licorice Room, you can eat all the furniture. And, when guests come over, they can stay on the Tootsie rollaway bed.

Ross: This is the coolest house ever! !

Phoebe: Hey, does anybody wanna join me in the aroma room? All right! I would!

Monica: Hey guys, guys, did you see my new, china cabinet? ! Uh huh.

Phoebe: Watch, watch. Ooohhhh! ! And, and! Ahhhh! !

Chandler: Hey, my father's house does that!

Rachel: O o o okay, how did it go? Tell me everything.

Chandler: Well, movie was great, dinner was great, and there's nothing like a cool, crisp New York evening. Hmm.

Chandler:'Course I didn't get to enjoy any of that, because Joanna's such a big, dull dud!

Joanna: Chandle is fantastic! !

Rachel: What? ! Oh God, we just clicked! You know how people just click? Like he came by to pick me up, and I opened the door, and it was just like, click! Did he tell you? Oh, I.

Joanna: Oh, and he's got such a good heart! Doesn't he have a good heart? Oh, I know.

Joanna: Oh, I know and he's soo sweet! Listen, he said he was gonna call, so put him straight through.

Sophie: Isn't this great? ! Don't spoil it.

Joey: Come on baby, don't go. Please? What do you say?

The Director: Hello. Oh! It's you. Just ah, just one one sec. I am going to take this call.

When I continue, I hope that there will appear on stage this magical thing that in the theatre, we call, committing to the moment!

Joey: That guy's like a cartoon. What do you see in him anyway?

Kate: He happens to be brilliant. Just more than I can say for that sweater you're dating.

Joey: Hey, I'm not interested in her sweater! It's what's underneath her sweater that counts. And besides, since ah, since when do you care who I'm going out with?

Kate: I don't care. Why, do you want me to care?

Joey: Do you want me to want you to care?

Kate: Do you?

Joey: What?

The Director: Ok, I'm afraid to say this, but let's pick it up where we left off.

Joey: Come on baby, don't go. Please? What do you say? I've got no reason to stay.