评论
打印
So you see, what you're eating is not technically yogurt, because it doesn't have enough live acidophilus cultures.
知道了吧，你吃的这个不算是真的酸奶酪，因为里面没有足够的活的嗜酸培养菌。
It's really just ice milk with carrageenan added for thickness.
只不过是冰牛奶里加了点角叉胶增加粘稠度。
Oh, very interesting. It's also not pink and has no berries.
喔，真有意思哈。它也不真是粉红色，也没有天然浆果粒。
Yeah, but it doesn't really answer my question.
嗯，可这也没有回答我的问题呐。
What was your question again?
你问的啥问题？
Do you want some? Right. No. I'm lactose intolerant. Right. So, gas. Yeah, got it.
你要来点儿不？对对...不用了，我受不了乳糖的。对哦。吃了会放屁的。好吧明白了。
Well...good night.
那么... 晚安了。
What are you doing? Oh, there's a draft.
你这是做什么呢？哦，那边有阵风。
I didn't feel a draft.
我没觉得有风啊。
Why don't we just go into, uh, your...
那我们还是去... 你的...
Yeah, you know what, maybe we should slow things down a little. No, no, I didn't mean to go into your apartment to go fast.
我说，也许我们不该那么着急。不，我不是说要去你公寓去急着干嘛干嘛。
No, I know. I know what you meant, it's just...this is only our first date.
当然了，我知道，我知道你不是那意思，只是...这才是咱俩第一次约会。
Yeah, okay, sure, no problem. Why don't we just figure out where we're going and when we want to get there, and then rate of speed equals distance over time. Solve for R.
嗯，好啊，没问题，那我们就先想想下次要去哪儿，准备啥时候到那儿，这样距离除以时间就......知道速度。
Or we could just wing it.
我们也可以到时候再想嘛。
That might work, too. Good night, Leonard. Good night.
那没准也行。晚安 Leonard 晚安
He's coming screen saver! Oh, hey, Leonard. How was your date?
他来了，快上屏保！嘿，兰纳德，约会怎么样哇？
Bite me. Sheldon, how could you just sit there and let them spy on me?
要你管。谢尔顿，你怎么能傻坐着眼睁睁看他们监视我呢？
They were clever, Leonard. They exploited my complete lack of interest in what you were doing.
他们精明啊兰纳德，他们完全明白我对你那些破事儿一点兴趣没有。
You should thank us.
你还该谢谢我们呢，
When future generations try to determine why your relationship with Penny crashed and burned, this right here is the black box.
要是后来人想弄明白你和佩妮的恋情为啥会土崩瓦解，这玩意儿就是黑匣子呐！
What are you talking about? The date went fine.
你胡说什么，约会挺好的。
Dude, she said she wants to slow things down.
拜托，她都说了想要慢慢来。
Okay, so she said she wants to slow things down.
好吧，她是说了想要慢慢来。
It's like saying, "I'm really enjoying this meal. I'm going to slow down and savor it."
意思差不多就是“今天的晚餐我非常喜欢，我得慢慢来，好好回味一下”
No, it's like, "This fish tastes bad, so I'm gonna slow down and spit it out."
不，她的意思像是：“这鱼真难吃死了，我得慢慢来吐光了它”
You being the fish. I'm not the fish.
这臭鱼说的就是你！我才不是这臭鱼呢。
Oh, really? Did you make a second date?
真的？你俩定了下一次约会吗？
Well, no, we sort of decided to wing it. Oh, even I know that's lame.
这倒没有... 我们说好了到时候再想。得了吧，连我都觉得这太逊了。
Okay, all right, let's assume your hypothesis.
行啊，咱就说说你的假设，
We went to dinner, we talked, we laughed, we kissed. Where could I have possibly gone wrong?
我们一起去吃饭，有说有笑有吻有抱，这还能错到哪儿去啊？
Think back, Leonard. The littlest things can set women off. Like,
你好好想想兰纳德，再小的事情都能让女人爆发。比方说，
"Hey, the waitress is hot, I bet we could get her to come home with us.
“嘿，这服务生真辣，我打赌肯定能让她跟咱回家”，
"Or, "How much does your mom weigh? I want to know what I'm getting into."
或者“你妈妈有多重呐？我想知道我搭上的是啥样的妞儿。”
I didn't say anything like that. Good, cause they don't work.
这种话我才不会说。不错，因为那些不起作用。
They also don't care for it if you stare at them and hyperventilate.
她们也不关心你是不是盯着她们呼吸加速，
Sadly, that's my home run swing.
挺惨的。在我们家这就像是家族传统
Look, everything went fine.
我说，一切都挺好的，
I didn't even have to refer to my impromptu conversation starters.
连事先准备的一些开场白都没用到呢，
That woman across the hall is into me. Let's go to the tape.
走廊对面那个女孩就是喜欢我嘛。咱还是看带子吧。
Look at her reaction to the good night kiss. No change in respiration, pupils undilated, no flushing of the chest.
你瞧她吻别时的反应，呼吸平稳，瞳孔没有放大，胸口也没有起伏。
Nice close up, by the way.
这特写镜头拍的真赞。
Interesting. Her jaws are clenched: no tongue access. Clearly a bad sign amongst mating humans.
有意思嘿，她的下巴很紧，也没有用舌头。对于寻偶期的人类来说这可不是啥好消息。
That's not a bad sign, Please. You might as well have been two iguana with no dewlap enlargement.
这怎么就不是好消息了。得了吧，还不如说你们是两只鬣蜥只是喉部没有垂肉罢了。
And the worst sign of all is you're here and not there.
最糟的就是这会儿你不在她家而在这里！
I'm not there because I'm taking things slow, which, by the way, compared to you guys, approaches warp speed.
我不在她家因为我也决定慢慢来这个...跟你们比起来都快接近星际速度了。
And take down that camera.
快把摄像头给我撤了。
He was a lot more fun when he had no hope. Give him time.
他心里没牵没挂的时候真有意思多了。给他点时间吧。
Hi. Oh, hi, Penny.
你好啊佩妮。
FYI, the hot water is inadequate on machine two, so colors only, and four is still releasing the fabric softener too early in the cycle, so I'd avoid using that for your delicates. Thanks.
顺便说句，2号机器的热水不足，别深色浅色混着洗，4号机器呢洗衣程序中还是会提前放出织物柔顺剂。所以你那些精致的衣服还是别用那台了。谢了
Oh, good Lord...why don't you just take your clothes down to the river and beat them with a rock?
老天爷啊...你还不如把衣服拿到河边搁在石头上猛捶一阵。
Sheldon, can I ask you a question?
谢尔顿，我问你个问题行不？
I would prefer that you not, but I won't go so far as to forbid it.
我宁愿你不问，但是我不会阻止你的。
All right, I heard yes, so...
那... 我就当你同意了。
Okay, here's my question. Has Leonard ever dated, you know, a regular girl?
我想问问你，兰纳德以前有没有，跟正常的女孩子约会过？
Well, I assume you're not referring to digestive regularity.
我想你指的应该不是消化功能正常吧。
Because I've come to learn that such inquiries are inappropriate.
要是那样的话，我想这问题问的不合适。
No, I meant, has he ever been involved with someone who wasn't a brainiac?
我是说他有没有跟没那么大学问的女孩子谈过？
Well, a few years ago, he did go out with a woman who had a PhD in French literature.
几年前，他确实跟一个学法国文学的女博士约会过。
How is that not a brainiac?
这还不算有大学问？
Well, for one thing, she was French. For another, it was literature.
理由一她是法国人，理由二她读的是文学。
So...do you think that if Leonard and I keep dating, he'll eventually get bored with me?
那你觉得...如果我和兰纳德继续好下去，他会不会有一天觉得我很没劲啊？
That depends. On what?
那得看情况。什么情况？
Do you have a working knowledge of quantum physics? No.
你懂量子物理吗？不懂
Do you speak Klingon? No.
你会说克林贡语吗？不会。
You know any card tricks? Okay, you know what...
你会耍牌吗？行了，我说...
I get it. Leonard has no business being involved with a waitressslashactress who felt so insecure that she lied to him about finishing community college.
我明白了，兰纳德和一个服务员兼二流演员没有共同语言，而且她还骗他说上完了社区大学心里正发慌呢。
Why would you lie about that?
你为什么撒谎？
Well, he was going on and on about this college and that grad school, and I...I didn't want him to think I was some kind of stupid loser.
他总是在说这大学怎样，那个研究生院怎么样，我就...我不想让他觉得我很傻很衰嘛。
You thought the opposite of "stupid loser" was "community college graduate"?
你觉得“愚蠢的失败者”的反义词是“社区大学毕业生”？
You know, there are a lot of successful people in this country who are community college graduates.
很多成功人士都是从社区大学毕业的。
Yeah, but you are neither.
没错，可你哪个都挨不上边。
Right. Okay, look, this is between you and me. You cannot tell Leonard any of this.
对。好吧，你得替我保密，啥也不要告诉兰纳德
You're asking me to keep a secret? Yeah.
你要我保守秘密？是的。
Well, I'm sorry, but you would have had to express that desire before revealing the secret, so that I could choose whether or not I wanted to accept the covenant of secret keeping.
那真对不起了，你应该在说出秘密前表达出要我保密的意思，我好选择到底要不要替你保密。
You can't impose a secret on an expost face to basis. What?
你事后再说，这怎么行呢？什么？
Secret keeping is a complicated endeavor.
保守秘密是一项艰巨复杂的任务。
One has to be concerned not only about what one says, but about facial expressions, autonomic reflexes.
不但要注意说的话，还得注意面部表情，习惯性反应。
When I try to deceive, I myself have more nervous tics than a Lyme disease research facility.
我说谎的时候，因为紧张产生的扁虱比莱姆关节炎研究设备产生的还多。
It's a joke. It relies on the homonymic relationship between "tick,"the bloodsucking arachnid, and "tic," the involuntary muscular contraction.
这是笑话，同音词嘛"tick"是指吸血蜘蛛，而"tic"是无意识的肌肉痉挛。
I made it up myself.
我自己编的。
Okay, look, if Leonard finds out that I lied, I will absolutely die of embarrassment.
听着，如果兰纳德发现我说谎，我一定羞愧自尽了。
Physiologically impossible. Oh, Sheldon, please. Look, I am asking you as a friend.
生理学上讲是不可能的。哦谢尔顿，拜托，我是以朋友的名义请求你。
So you're saying that friendship contains within it an inherent obligation to maintain confidences? Well, yeah.
照你这么说，友谊就要无条件的保守秘密？是啊。
Interesting. One more question, and perhaps I should have led with this. When did we become friends?
有意思。再一个问题，或许应该这样问，我们什么时候成朋友了？
i. e. , I couldn't become Green Lantern unless I was chosen by the Guardians of Oa, but given enough startup capital and an adequate research facility, I could be Batman.
也就是说，要不被总部守护先知选中，我就成不了绿灯侠，但如果给我足够的启动资金和足够的科研设备，我就能成为蝙蝠侠
You could be Batman? Sure. I'm Batman. See?
你能成为蝙蝠侠？当然，我就是蝙蝠侠，看见没？
Hi, guys. Hi, Penny.
嗨伙计们。嗨佩妮。
Penny, if you're not doing anything Friday night, I thought maybe we could go see a movie.
佩妮，你周五晚上有空的话，我们去看电影吧。
Oh, um, you know, I think I have the dinner shift on Friday.
呃，我周五晚上要轮班。
Okay, what about Saturday?
好吧，周六呢？
You know, I'm not sure; the manager hasn't posted the schedule yet. How about I let you know?
说不准，经理还没公布排班表呢，出来了我再告诉你？
Great. So you just let me know when you know.
很好，那你知道了就告诉我。
Okay, so... Oh, God, I am the bad fish. What did I do wrong?
好的那...天呐我就是那条臭鱼。我哪做错了？
Why are you asking me?
你为什么问我？
I have no information about your interactions with Penny other than what you have provided me, nor do I have any method of learning such things.
你和佩妮的事儿除了你已经告诉我的，我啥也不知道，我也没有本事学到。
What does that mean? Nothing.
这话什么意思？没什么。
You seem to be implying an informational back channel between me and Penny where obviously none exists. No, I didn't.
你说的倒像是我和佩妮背地里通了气，很明显这是没有的事。没，我没觉得。
I just think you need to be careful how you phrase things, sir.
我想你要注意你的表达了先生。
What's going on with you? I might ask you the same question.
你怎么回事？这问题我也得问问你吧。
Why do you insist on attempting to drag me into matters which have nothing to do with me, but exist between you and Penny, a person to whom I barely speak?
那些跟我无关的事儿你何必非要把我扯进去？都是你和陪你之间的事，我跟她连话都不怎么说的。
What's wrong with your face?
你脸怎么了？
There's no reason to bring my looks into this.
我脸这样没啥原因。
Good day, Leonard. What? I said,"Good day."
祝你今天过的愉快兰纳德。什么？我说 "祝你今天过的愉快"
