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All right, I'm moving my infantry division, augmented by a battalion of orcs from Lord of the Rings.
现在我调动步兵师和指环王中的半兽人兵团，从两翼包夹了田纳西的志愿者军团，
We flank the Tennessee volunteers and the North once again wins the Battle of Gettysburg.
在北方我们又一次赢得了葛底斯堡战役。
Not so fast. Remember, the South still has two infantry divisions. Plus Superman and Godzilla.
没这么容易，南方还有两个步兵师，再加上超人和哥斯拉。
No, no, no. Orcs are magic. Superman is vulnerable to magic.
不对，半兽人是魔法部队，超人最怕魔法。
Not to mention you already lost Godzilla to the Illinois Cavalry and Hulk.
更别提哥斯拉早已被伊利诺伊骑兵和绿巨人消灭。
Why don't you just have Robert E. Lee charge the line with Shiva and Ganesh?
为什么不让罗伯特·李将军冲锋？他可以带上湿婆和格涅沙。
You guys ready to order? Hang on, honey.
可以点餐了吗？稍等宝贝。
Shiva and Ganesh, the Hindu gods, against the entire Union army? And orcs.
湿婆和格涅沙，印度教之神？对抗整个北部联军？还有半兽人。
I'll be back.
我稍候再来。
Excuse me. Ganesh is the Remover of Obstacles and Shiva is the Destroyer.
不好意思，象头神格涅沙擅长清除障碍，湿婆是毁灭之神。
When the smoke clears, Abraham Lincoln will be speaking Hindi and drinking mint juleps.
当硝烟散尽，林肯将会边说印第语，边喝南方的薄荷饮料。
All right, my boss says you have to either order or leave and never come back.
我老板说你们要么点餐，要么永远给他滚蛋。
What do you recommend for someone who worked up a man-sized appetite from a morning of weight training and cardio funk? A shower.
对于做了一早上的举重和有氧锻炼，冒着甜美气息的我，有什么推荐菜式？洗澡。
I'll take the Heart Smart platter.
我要个奶酪拼盘。
All right, thank you, and Sheldon?
好，谢谢你，谢尔顿呢？
We don't eat here. I don't know what's good.
我们没在这里吃过，不知道什么好吃。
Well, it's all good. Statistically unlikely.
都很好吃。概率上不太可能。
Just get a hamburger. You like hamburgers.
就点一个汉堡。你喜欢汉堡。
I like the hamburgers where we usually have hamburgers.
我喜欢我们常去的那家汉堡店的汉堡，
You can't make the assumption that I'll like the hamburgers here.
不能假定我也喜欢这里的汉堡。
I'm sorry. Give him a hamburger.
对不起。给他一个汉堡。
All right, which one? The Classic Burger, the Ranch House Burger, the Barbecue Burger, or the Kobe Burger?
好吧，哪种？经典汉堡，农家汉堡，烧烤汉堡，柯比汉堡？
Can't we just go to Big Boy?
能不能去大胖汉堡店？
They only have one burger ... the Big Boy.
他们只有一种汉堡，大胖汉堡。
Well, the Barbecue Burger is like the Big Boy.
烧烤汉堡跟大胖汉堡挺像的
Excuse me, in a world that already includes a Big Boy why would I settle for something like a Big Boy?
对不起，既然世上已经有大胖汉堡，为什么我们要满足于像大胖汉堡呢？
Because you're not at Big Boy!
因为你不在大胖汉堡店！
Fine, I'll have the Barbecue Burger. Make it two.
好吧，那我要烧烤汉堡。我也要这个。
Waitresses don't yell at you at Big Boy.
大胖汉堡店的侍应从不高声训我。
Hey, Leonard. Hi, guys. Hey. Hi, Leslie.
嘿，兰纳德。你们好。你好。莱斯莉。
I didn't know you ate here.
不知道你们会来这里吃饭。
We don't. This is a disturbing aberration.
确实不会，这次是烦扰的例外。
Leslie, this is Penny. She lives across the hall from Sheldon and me.
莱斯莉，她是佩妮，住在我和谢尔顿的对面。
And walks in quiet beauty like the night.
她优美安详地走着，如同漆黑的夜晚。
Howard, I've asked you not to do that.
霍华德，我已经说了，别这样。
Leslie and I do research together at the university.
莱斯莉和我在同个实验室做研究。
Oh, wow, a girl scientist.
哇，女科学家。
Yep, come for the breasts, stay for the brains.
没胸，只好多长点大脑。
So, I'm glad I ran into you. The Physics Department string quartet needs a new cellist.
碰见你太好了，物理系弦乐四重奏还缺一个大提琴。
What happened to Elliot Wong?
埃里维特·王怎么了？
He switched over to high-energy radiation research had a little mishap, and now the other guys are uncomfortable sitting next to him.
他调到高能辐射课题组了，发生一些小意外，其他成员怕坐在他身边。
So are you in?
你来不来？
Yeah, sure, why not?
当然来。
Great, we rehearse on Tuesdays at your place.
太好了，周二去你那里彩排。
Why at my place?
为什么去我那里？
Yeah, Department of Energy said our regular space is kind of a hot zone.
能源部说我们原来排练的地方现在是危险区。
Nice meeting you. Yeah, you, too.
很高兴见到你。我也是。
Leonard, I didn't know you played the cello.
兰纳德，不知道你会拉大提琴。
Yeah, my parents felt that naming me Leonard and putting me in Advanced Placement classes wasn't getting me beaten up enough.
是啊，我父母觉得给我取名兰纳德，让我上天才班，还不够打倒我的。
If you're into music, I happen to be a human beatbox. Really?
你喜欢音乐吗？我会学架子鼓。真的？
I'm actually not that into music.
其实我不是太喜欢音乐。
So, hey, your friend is really cute. Anything going on with you two?
你那个朋友不错，你们俩是不是有点情况？
L - Leslie? No, no. What, are you kidding?
莱斯莉？没有。怎么可能？
He asked her out once. It was an embarrassing failure.
他约过她一次，尴尬地失败了。
Thank you, Sheldon. Oh, I'm sorry. Was that supposed to be a secret?
多谢，谢尔顿。噢，对不起，这个需要保密吗？
Aw, that's too bad. You guys'd make a cute couple.
哦，太可惜了，你们本可以做一对甜蜜情侣。
Oh, dear. What's the matter? She didn't take my order.
我的天。怎么了？她没问我点什么。
How can she take your order when you're too neurotic to talk to her?
她怎么问你？你紧张得连话都不会说。
Nevertheless, this will be reflected in her tip.
尽管如此，这将反映在她的小费上。
What did Penny mean, "You'd make a cute couple?"
佩妮说“你们本可以做一对甜蜜情侣”什么意思？
Well, I assume she meant the two of you together would constitute a couple that others might consider cute.
我想她的意思是你们两个在一起可以组成情侣，并且令其他人觉得你们甜蜜。
An alternate and somewhat less likely interpretation is that you could manufacture one.
另一个不太可能的解释是你们可以制造一对情侣。
As in, "Oh, look,Leonard and Leslie made Mr. and Mrs. Goldfarb. Aren't they adorable?"
例如，“快看，兰纳德和莱斯莉所生的高德法布夫妻是不是很可爱？”
If Penny didn't know that Leslie had turned me down, then it would unambiguously mean that she,
如果佩妮不知道莱斯莉拒绝过我，那么这一句的所指将十分清晰，
Penny, thought I should ask her, Leslie, out
即她（佩妮）认为我应该追她（莱斯莉），
indicating that she, Penny, had no interest in me asking her, Penny, out.
表明她（佩妮）对于我追求她（佩妮）并无兴趣；
But, because she did know that I had asked Leslie out and that she, Leslie, had turned me down,
但由于她知道我追过莱斯莉并且她（莱斯莉）已经拒绝我，
then she, Penny, could be offering consolation.
那么她（佩妮）可能只是安慰我。
"That's too bad, you would have made a cute couple..." but while thinking, "Good, Leonard remains available."
“真可惜，你们本来可以做一对甜蜜情侣……”并且暗想“很好，兰纳德还是单身。”
You're a lucky man, Leonard. How so?
你很幸运，兰纳德。怎么说？
You're talking to one of the three men in the western hemisphere capable of following that train of thought.
听你说话的人是西半球仅有的三个能跟得上你思维的人之一。
Well, what do you think?
那你怎么看？
I said I could follow it. I didn't say I care.
我只是听懂了，不代表有兴趣。
I admire your fingering. Thank you.
我很欣赏你的指法。谢谢。
Maybe sometime you can try that on my instrument.
也许有时间你可以在我的“乐器”上演练一下。
Good night, guys. Good job. Thanks.
晚安兄弟，练得不错。谢谢。
See you next week.
下周见。
That was fun, Leslie. Thanks for including me.
挺好玩的莱斯莉，多谢你叫上我。
You're welcome. If you're up for it we could practice that middle section again. Sure, why not?
不客气。如果你有兴趣我们可以再练一下中间部分。好吧，为什么不呢？
Just so we're clear,
说说清楚比较好，
you understand that me hanging back to practice with you is a pretext for letting you know that I'm sexually available.
你知不知道我留下来陪你加练是一个铺垫，为了让你知道我是潜在性对象。
Really? Yeah, I'm good to go.
真的？是的，我随时可以。
I thought you weren't interested in me.
我以为你对我没兴趣。
That was before I saw you handling that beautiful piece of wood between your legs.
那是在看到你摆弄两腿之间那块优雅的木头之前。
You mean my cello?
你是指大提琴？
No, I mean the obvious, crude, double entendre. I'm seducing you. No kidding.
不，那是一个明显下流的双关语。我在勾引你。没开玩笑吧。
What can I say? I'm a passionate and impulsive woman. So how about it?
怎么说呢，我是有激情的冲动型女人。你说呢？
Gee. Uh ... Is it the waitress? Penny? What about her?
这个。呃 ... 因为那个侍应生？佩妮？她怎么了？
I thought I saw your pupils dilate when you looked at her.
你看她的时候瞳孔放大，
Which, unless you're a heroin addict, points to sexual attraction.
这表明有性吸引力，除非是海洛因成瘾反应。
Well, I did have a poppy seed bagel for breakfast.
我早餐吃了一个含罂粟籽的百吉饼。
Which could cause a positive urine test for opiates but certainly not dilate my pupils.
可能导致阿片碱尿检阳性，但肯定不至于扩大瞳孔，
So I guess there was no point in bringing it up.
所以……我不知道为什么要说起这个。
You and the waitress then.
你喜欢那个侍应生。
No ... no. There's nothing going on between Penny and me.
没有，我和佩妮之间没什么。
So you're open to a sexual relationship? Yeah, yeah, I guess I am.
所以你可以建立性关系了？可以，我想。
Good. Yeah, it is. It is good.
好。很好。
Did you want to start now?
要现在就开始？
Why don't we finish the section first?
为什么我们不演完这一章呢？
Oh, okay. A little musical foreplay. Terrific.
好的，音乐前戏，不错。
I'm g-good to go. Me, too.
我准备好了。我也是。
Oh, hey, Sheldon. What's going on?
谢尔顿，怎么了？
I need your opinion on a matter of semiotics. I'm sorry?
我需要符号学方面的帮助。什么？
Semiotics. The study of signs and symbols. It's a branch of philosophy related to linguistics.
符号学，研究符号和象征，是语言学基本理论的分支。
Okay, sweetie, I know you think you're explaining yourself but you're really not.
亲爱的，你以为自己在解释，但其实你没有。
Just come with me.
跟我来。
Well? Well, what? What does it mean?
怎样？什么怎样？什么意思？
Oh, come on, you went to college. Yes, but I was 11.
得了，你上过大学的。我11岁上的。
All right, look, a tie on the doorknob usually means someone doesn't want to be disturbed because, they're ...
好吧，是这样，门把手上挂条领带意思是不想被打扰，因为……
you know, getting busy.
因为在忙活。
So you're saying Leonard has a girl in there?
就是说兰纳德跟个女孩在房间里？
Well, either that or he's lost his tie rack and gotten really into Bryan Adams.
不然就是他丢了衣架还疯狂地喜欢上了布莱恩·亚当斯。
Oh, Leonard, you magnificent beast.
兰纳德，你这了不起的野兽！
We really shouldn't be standing here.
我们不该站这。
This is very awkward.
太尴尬了。
Oh, come on, Leonard's had girls over before, right?
兰纳德以前也带女孩回来过吧？
Oh, yes, but there's usually planning, courtship, advance notice...
有的，但通常要计划，求爱，提前通知……
Last time, I was able to book a cruise to the Arctic to see a solar eclipse.
就像上次，我才有时间预订去北极看日食的旅行。
You had to leave the state because your roommate was having sex?
你室友要做爱，你就得离开这个州？
I didn't have to. The dates just happened to coincide.
不是必须，时间上完全是个巧合。
So, do you know who's in there? Well, there's Leonard.
你知道里面那是谁吗？里面有兰纳德。
And he's either with Leslie Winkle or a 1930s gangster.
跟他在一起的不是莱斯莉·温珂就是30年代的黑帮。
Hmm, good for him. Good for Leonard. Okay, night.
恭喜他了。恭喜兰纳德。好吧，晚安。
No, no, wait, hold on.
等等，别走！
What's the matter?
怎么了？
I don't know what the protocol is here.
我不知道这种情况下标准做法是什么。
Do I stay, Do I leave?
我该留下来，还是出去？
Do I wait to greet them with a refreshing beverage?
他们出来时要递上提神饮料吗？
Gee, Sheldon, you're asking the wrong girl.
谢尔顿你问错人了，
I'm usually on the other side of the tie.
我通常在领带的另一边。
Hi, Leonard? It's me, Sheldon. In the living room.
你好兰纳德。是我谢尔顿，我在客厅。
I just ... I wanted you to know I saw the tie. Message received.
我就想告诉你，我看到领带了，收到你的消息了。
