I wasn't brought up saying grace.
我家并没有饭前祷告的传统。
But for the last 20 years, we've been holding hands before every meal.
但在过去的20年里,每次用餐前我们都会牵住彼此的手。
It's a beautiful bit of shared silence that brings us all together in the moment.
那是寂静又美好的时刻,我们在那时紧密相依。
Ashton tells everyone to "pass the squeeze," while she assures them it's not religious.
Ashton告诉大家,要紧握彼此,但她保证这并不带有宗教性质。
So recently, when my family asked me if I could please do something with the more than 250 boxes of stuff that I've collected over a lifetime,
最近,当我的家人问我,我是否能用我一生收集的250多箱东西做点什么时,
my ritual-making impulse kicked in.
“举行仪式”的冲动再次涌上心头。
I started wondering if I could go further than simple death cleaning.
我开始想,除去死亡清理,我还能再做些什么?
"Death cleaning" is the Swedish term for clearing out your closets, your basement and your attic
“死亡清理”是瑞典的习俗,在你去世前你会清理你的壁橱、地下室和阁楼,
before you die, so your kids don't have to do it later.
这样你的孩子以后就不用做这些了。
I pictured my children opening up box after box and wondering why I'd kept any of that stuff.
我开始想象我的孩子们打开一个又一个箱子,猜想我为什么要留着这些物什。
And then I imagined them looking at a specific picture of me with a beautiful young woman,
我能想象到当他们看着我和一位妙龄女子的合影时,
and asking, "Who on earth is that with Dad?" And that was the aha moment.
满腹疑惑“和我爸爸在一起的究竟是谁”。这就是“顿悟时刻”。
It wasn't the things I'd saved that were important; it was the stories that went with them that gave them meaning.
并非是我留下的东西很重要,它背后的故事才是意义所在。
Could using the objects to tell the stories be the seed of a new ritual, a rite of passage
是否可以通过讲述它们的故事,开启一项新仪式,
not for a 13-year-old, but for someone much further down the road?
不再是给13岁准备的成人礼,而是为了更年长的人们。