How do I put my aspirations into effect? "What is the best way to start?" "Where do I go?" "Who can help me?" "How did you do it?"
比如“怎样才能把理想付诸实践?”“什么是开始做一件事的最好方法”“我要朝哪个方向发展?”“谁能给予我帮助?”“别人是如何成功的?”
In this period, which is longer and more stable compared with the passage that leads to it, the tasks are as enormous as they are exhilarating: To shape a Dream, that vision of ourselves which will generate energy, aliveness, and hope. To prepare for a lifework. To find a mentor if possible. And to form the capacity for intimacy, without losing in the process whatever consistency of self we have thus far mustered. The first test structure must be erected around the life we choose to try.
与前一阶段相比,这个阶段要更长、更稳定。在这个时期,人们的任务既繁重又令人振奋:要将梦想具体化,因为想象实现梦想的自己可以令我们精力充沛、朝气蓬勃、充满希望;要为毕生的事业做好准备;如果可能的话还要找个导师;要培养与人建立亲密关系而又不会受他人左右而迷失至今建立的自我的能力。人生的第一个试验性规划一定要围绕我们选择尝试的生活去建立。
Doing what we "should" is the most pervasive theme of the twenties. The "shoulds" are largely defined by family models, the press of the culture, or the prejudices of our peers.
“做该做的事”是二十几岁的人群中最为流行的主题。至于“该做的事”是什么,在很大程度上由家庭中的榜样、文化上的压力或者同龄人的偏见来界定。
If the prevailing cultural instructions are that one should get married and settle down behind one's own door, a nuclear family is born. If instead the peers insist that one should do one's own thing, the 25-year-old is likely to harness himself onto a Harley-Davidson and burn up Route 66 in the commitment to have no commitments.
如果流行的文化取向是成家立户,一个小家庭就会产生。如果同龄人坚持认为一个人应该干自己想干的事,25岁左右的年轻人就会整天无牵无挂地驾着自己的哈雷戴维森摩托在66号高速公路上奔驰。
One of the terrifying aspects of the twenties is the inner conviction that the choices we make are irrevocable. It is largely a false fear. Change is quite possible, and some alteration of our original choices is probably inevitable.
二十几岁的人往往认为自己此时做出的选择会无法改变,这令他们极为恐惧。其实这种恐惧毫无必要。改变是极有可能的,对于原先做出的某些选择做出修正甚至往往是不可避免的。