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Chandler: What? !
什么？！
Monica: This was fun! But I've got an invasive vaginal exam to get to!
这真有趣，但是我有内诊要去做！
Chandler: I'd love to stay, but I have eh ... got a hot date ...
我也希望我可以留下来，但是我有个火辣的约会。
Janice: Please go! Just let me know if you need a hand!
请便，如果你需要帮手的话告诉我。
Chandler: I think it just fell off.
我想它刚刚消退了。
Phoebe: Hello "ja", it's time for your massage, ja! Put-put your face in the hole.
嗨，是的按摩时候到了，是的把你的脸放入洞中。
Rachel: Wow, a Swedish massage from a real Swedish person.
真正瑞典人做的瑞典式按摩。
Phoebe: Ok, then I'm Swedish.
好的，那我就是瑞典人。
Monica: So, what's your name?
你叫什么名字呢？
Phoebe: It's a normal Swedish name ... Ikea.
只是平凡一般的瑞典名字宜家（瑞典家具卖场）。
Rachel: Oh, what an interesting name.
哇，真是有趣的名字。
Phoebe: Ja!
是啊！
Rachel: You know I ...
你知道，我……
Phoebe: Time for your scalp massage!
头皮按摩时间到了！
Rachel: Wow. I really love your ...
哇，我真的好喜欢你的……
Phoebe: Is something wrong?
有什么不对吗？
Rachel: No, it's just that uhm ... just feels so good ... Ikea.
不，只是……只是觉得很舒服……宜家。
Rachel: No, hey, say, you'll know this, what's the capital of Sweden?
嘿，看你知不知道这个，瑞典的首都是哪里呢？
Phoebe: Uhm ... Stockholm.
斯德哥尔摩。
Rachel: Damn! I wish I knew if that was right!
该死的！希望我知道那是对还是错。
Joey: Note the painterly lines and subtle impasto on this canvas. Monet painted quickly and usually outdoors as his elusive subject was light itself.
看那些线条，潜藏多层颜料厚涂在画布上……莫奈快速地作画，而且通常是在户外……因为他和光线一样喜欢孤独。
Ross: Now, do you have any idea what you just said?
你知道你刚刚说的是什么意思吗？
Joey: No, no, my mouth says the words, my brain is thinking monster trucks!
不，我的嘴巴说着那些字，但是我的头脑想的是“怪兽卡车”！
Ross: Wow.
哇喔。
Ross: Ok now, remember, when you get to the museum, Monet is-is not spelt M-O-N-A-Y.I just ... I wrote that out phonetically for you.
现在，记住，当你进入博物馆时……莫奈的写法不是MONAY。我只是帮你用发音写下来。
Joey: Phonetically?
发音？
Ross: Yeah, yeah, that means ... you know? We just ... we don't have time for this.
是的，那是……我们没有时间讨论那些了。
Joey: Ok.
好的。
Ross: Ok, but you know what? I gotta say, I'm really impressed that-that you were able to memorize all this so quickly!
我得说我真的很惊讶你可以这么快速背下这些东西！
Joey: Ah! I'm an actor! I can memorize anything! Last week on "Days" I had to say "Frontal temporal zygomatic craniotomy".
我是演员，我可以背下任何东西的，上星期在《我们的日子》剧中，我得说：“前端颞颧骨切开术”。
Ross: Wow. Wh-what's that mean?
哇，那是什么意思呢？
Joey: No idea!
不知道！
Joey: But the guy I said it to dies in the next scene so, I guess it means "you're gonna get eaten by a bear".
但是那个被我那样说的男的，在下一集就死了，所以我想那可能是说“你会被熊给吃了”。
Ross: Ok! Um. So let's move on to the, to the Renaissance?
好的，那我们来看，文艺复兴时期？
Joey: Ok, Caravaggio uses chiaroscuro here to highlight the anguish of the central figure. Touch it, it's really bumpy!
好的，卡拉瓦乔在这里使用了明暗对照法……突显出中央人物的极度痛苦。碰触它，还真是凹凸不平！
Ross: Nah ah! Nah ah! No no no! No ad-libbing and dude, you-you can't touch the paintings.
不，不能即兴演出，还有，你不能乱碰的。
Joey: Come on! you ...
担心什么？
Ross: No! No!
不！
Chandler: My specimen is in the room, and I just wanna thank whoever knocked on the door while I was in there.
我的样本在房间里了，我只想谢谢刚刚那个。我在里面的时候敲门的人。
Chandler: Really helped speed the process along!
真的帮助加速了整个流程！
Chandler: Janice! You're not ... gone?
珍妮丝，你还没有消失啊？
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him.
西德还在他的房间里，我不许家里有色情书刊，所以这对他而言简直是快乐假期。
Janice: So, did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
所以你做了吗？完成你的样品存放手续了吗？
Chandler: Yeah! yeah. Hard part is over!
是啊！最困难的部份结束了！
Janice: Oh, that's not the hard part honey!
那不是最困难的，亲爱的！
Chandler: Well, no, there is talking to you, but- Monica is gonna come out, we're gonna go soon.
没错啊，跟你说完了，莫妮卡出来了我们很快就要走了。
Janice: Chandler, the hard part is what comes next. Aren't you a little worried about the results? I mean, oh, when Sid and I did this last time. My God, I was a mess.
钱德，接下来才是最困难的部份，你难道不担心结果吗？我是说，当西德跟我上次来做的时候，我的天，我紧张死了。
Chandler: I haven't even ... thought about the results ... I just ... assumed that everything was gonna be ok.
我根本没有想过结果……我只是以为一切都会没事。
Janice: oh, you know what? you probably is.
结果你知道吗？
Chandler: Yeah, but what if it's not ok? I mean what if, what if there is a reason we can't have a baby?
或许就是没事但是要是有事呢？我是说万一我们不孕是有原因的呢？
Janice: Oh, Chandler, look. You and Monica are meant to have children. I am sure it's gonna be just fine.
钱德，听着，你跟莫妮卡一定会有小孩，我敢说一切一定都没事的。
Chandler: Yeah, yeah, ok, thanks. I mean I can't believe I didn't even think of that. I guess I was just so worried about having to ... come here and do ... 'that' ...
是啊，是啊，好了，谢谢。我不敢相信我竟然没有想过，我是说我好担心要过来这里做检验。
Janice: I mean, you can do it in the parking lot of a Taco Bell, but you can't do it at a doctor's office?
你可以在塔可钟餐厅的停车场做……但是你没有办法在诊所做吗？
Chandler: It was a "Wendy's!"
是在温蒂汉堡！
Phoebe: "Ipan Stripan, Glupi Glabi!" And that is the Swedish National Anthem! Thank you for asking!
这就是瑞典国歌，谢谢你问了！
Rachel: Wow, Ikea ... what a rich culture.
哇，宜家真是丰富的文化。
Rachel: Uhm, you know what? I have a-a friend who is a masseuse.
你知道吗？我有个朋友也是按摩师。
Phoebe: Oh, Ja! Ja!
喔？是吗？
Rachel: Yeah! She's ... uhm ... not very good though ...
是啊！不过她不是很行……
Phoebe: A-ha, A-ha, and why do you think that is?
啊哈，啊哈，你为什么会那样觉得呢？
Rachel: I don't know ... maybe it's because she has got such callusy fingers from playing crummy guitar ...
我不知道，或许是因为她的手指很僵硬，大概是练弹烂吉他造成的。
Phoebe: Ha-ha-ha ... or, maybe she has trouble loosening your knots because you're such a high-maintenance tight-ass!
哈哈哈……或许因为她很难放松你的筋骨，因为你真是个难搞的俏屁股！
Rachel: Phoebe!
菲比！
Phoebe: You know it's me?
你知道是我？
Rachel: For like a half an hour! Man, you can lie about Sweden!
嗯，知道半个小时了！
Phoebe: How-how can you come here?
你怎么能够到这里来呢？
Rachel: How could you not tell me you worked here?
你为什么没说你在这里工作呢？
Phoebe: I don't have to tell you everything!
我不需要告诉你每件事！
Rachel: Yes you do, if you're gonna make me feel guilty for getting a free massage!
如果你让我觉得来这里享受免费按摩是很罪恶的事，那你就要！
Phoebe: Tips not included.
小费还是要照算的。
Rachel: Oh!
噢！
Rachel: Phoebe, why did you lie to me about working here?
为什么你不敢说你在这里工作呢？
Phoebe: Because I was ashamed ok? I sold out for the cash!
因为我觉得很丢脸，好吗？我为金钱出卖自己！
Phoebe: And then they give me, give me benefits like medical, and dental, and a 401 Kur.
他们提供一些福利，像是医保、纳税什么的。
Phoebe: But you know ... you pay a price. Now I'm this Corporate stooge and punching a clock and Ugh! paying taxes!
但是你知道的，要付出代价的，现在我成了大公司的傀儡，每天打卡上班然后还要缴税！
Rachel: Phoebe, honey, if you hate it so much, you should walk out there right now and quit!
菲比，亲爱的，如果你这样痛恨这工作……你应该马上走出去，然后辞职。
Rachel: Be true to what you believe in! Honey, you have principles and I so admire that! I don't have any!
相信你所坚信的理念，亲爱的，你是有原则的人，所以我很钦佩你！我才是没有原则！
Phoebe: You know what? You are right. I am gonna quit. It's time I took my life back!
你知道吗？你说的对，我要去辞职。该是我重新生活的时候了！
Rachel: Good for you Pheebs!
很好，菲比。
Phoebe: Ok.
好。
Phoebe: If you guys have microphones in there too, I didn't mean any of that. I love you.
如果你们在里面也有装麦克风，我在里面说的都不是真的。我爱你们。
Ross: Haha! Got ya! Die, die, die!
打到了！死吧！死吧！死吧！
Ross: Respectfully, professor R.Geller.
诚挚地，盖勒教授敬上。
Ross: Hey!
嘿！
Charlie: Hey!
嗨！
Ross: Hey, how was, how was the Met?
嘿，大都会好玩吗？
Charlie: Oh, the museum was amazing!
博物馆真的很惊人！
Ross: Yeah? Joey really knows this art, huh?
是啊，乔伊真的很懂艺术，不是吗？
Charlie: Not so much, no. He had clearly memorized all the stuff to say, and some of it didn't even make any sense.
并不尽然，不很明显地他清楚地背下了要说的东西……但是很多东西都很不对劲。
Ross: What'd you mean?
你是什么意思呢？
Charlie: Well, for one, he was talking about paintings that were nowhere around.
嗯，例如……他谈论的都是根本不在展出的绘画。
Ross: Wait a minute ... wait, when you guys walked into the Met, did-did you go to the right?
等等，你们进入博物馆之后是往右边走吗？
Charlie: No, no, we went to the left.
不不，我们往左边走。
Ross: Oh Joey, Joey, Joey!
喔，乔伊，乔伊，乔伊！
Ross: Well still, I mean, it seems like you guys are having a great time together.
可是你们看起来也是度过快乐的时光啊。
Charlie: Yeah, yeah, it's fun.
是啊，是，很好玩。
Ross: What?
怎样？
Charlie: Actually, you know, Joey is your friend, and you don't really know me that well; it would be weird.
事实上，乔伊是你的朋友……而你也不是很了解我，这会很奇怪的。
Ross: What, I mean, a little, but no, what, go on.
嗯，可能会有点，但是不会啦，怎样呢？跟我说。
Charlie: Well ... I'm, I'm just thinking that maybe Joey isn't the right guy for me to be with right now, you know, maybe I should be with someone ...
嗯……我在想或许乔伊不是很适合我，你知道的，或许我应该跟……
Charlie: I have more in common with. You know what I mean?
跟我比较相像的人在一起，你知道我的意思吗？
Ross: Yeah.
是啊。
Ross: But you know what? Um, I don't know, I think, I think you should give Joey a chance.
是啊，但是你知道吗？我想你应该给乔伊一个机会，
Ross: I mean, he's a great guy, and sure he doesn't know that much about art but ...
我是说他是个好男人，当然他是不知道很多艺术的东西，但是……
Ross: you know, you could always talk about that with someone else.
你可以跟其他知道的人谈论啊。
Charlie: Yeah, I guess that's true.
我想也是。
Ross: And if you think about it, I mean the reason he memorized all that stuff is because he thought it was important to you.
如果你仔细想想……他背下所有的东西只是因为，他认为那些东西对你很重要。
Ross: You know, that's the kinda guy Joey is.
你知道的，乔伊就是那样子的人。
Charlie: He is very sweet.
他是非常贴心的。
Charlie: Plus he's hot!
还有，他真是帅毙了！
Ross: That-that was gonna be my next argument.
这就是我下一个要争论的。
Joey: Hey!
嘿！
Ross: Hey!
嘿！
Charlie: Hey!
嘿！
Joey: You ready?
你准备好了吗？
Charlie: Yeah, let's go.
好了，我们走吧。
Joey: Wow!
哇！
Charlie: Thanks, Ross.
谢了，罗斯。
Ross: Yeah.
不客气。
Joey: Hey Ross! That art stuff worked, you hooked me up.
嘿，罗斯！艺术那些东西真是有效，你真帮了大忙。
Ross: Glad I could help man.
很高兴能够帮上忙，兄弟。
Joey: Although some of that stuff wasn't where you said it was gonna be, but ... I made it work.
有些你说的东西并没有在那里，但是我都搞定了。
Chandler: It is not ok that I'm aroused by this now.
我现在不能因为这个而勃起了。
Chandler: Hello?
嗨？
Chandler: Oh, hi, Doctor Connelly. Uh, no, she's not here but, you know, I can tell her. Should I be sitting down for this?
喔，嗨，唐纳利医生。不，她现在不在……但是我可以转告她。我应该先坐下来再听吗？
Chandler: Oh. Uh-huh, uh-huh, well, so, what's that mean?
那，那是什么意思呢？
Chandler: Ok. Uh, ok, thank you. Thanks.
好的，好的，谢谢你。谢谢。
Monica: Hey sweetie.
嘿，亲爱的。
Chandler: Doctor Connelly just called.
唐纳利医生刚刚打电话来。
Monica: Oh. With-with good news?
有好消息吗？
Monica: Of course it is not good news, you just said "Doctor Connelly just called". If it was good news you would've said "Doctor Connelly just called! "
当然不是好消息啰，你是说“唐纳利医生刚刚打电话来”，如果是好消息你会说 “唐纳利医生刚刚打电话来！”
Monica: But, uh, so, what-what is it? Is it, uh, is there a problem, is there a problem with me, or with you?
那，是怎样呢？是不是……有问题吗？是我的问题还是你的呢？
Chandler: Actually it's both of us.
事实上我们两个都有问题。
Monica: What?
什么？
Chandler: Apparently my sperm have low motility and you have an inhospitable environment.
很显然地，我的精子活动力太低了，而你有不适宜着床的环境。
Monica: Oh. What's that mean?
喔，那是什么意思呢？
Chandler: It means that my guys won't get off their Barcaloungers and you have a uterus that is prepared to kill the ones that do.
意思就是说我的家伙根本没有办法出兵，而你的子宫已准备好，要杀死入侵的小兵了。
Chandler: It means ...
意思是……
Monica: Chandler?
等等，钱德？
Chandler: It means that we can keep trying, but there's a good chance this may never happen for us.
意思是我们可以继续尝试……但是我们很有可能永远都不会怀孕。
Monica: My God!
喔，我的！
Chandler: I'm sorry.
我很抱歉。
Monica: I'm sorry too.
我也很抱歉。
Chandler: Well, we're gonna, we're gonna figure this out.
嗯……我们会想出办法的。
Monica: I know.
我知道。
Receptionist: Good morning Phoebe.
早安，菲比。
Phoebe: Good morning receptionist.
早安，总台小姐。
Receptionist: Here's your schedule for the day. Your first client is in room No. 1.
这是你今天的工作排程。你第一位客人在一号房。
Phoebe: Rachel Green? Son of a bitch, she came back?
“瑞秋·格林”，狗娘养的！她又回来了？
Phoebe: Are you ready for your Scottish massage? Put your face in the hole, lassie.
你准备好要享受苏格兰式按摩了吗？把你的脸放进洞里，小姐。
