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Is it just me, or does Han sound kind of sexy when he speaks Korean?
是我自己的错觉，还是阿憨说韩文时有着别样的性感啊
Looks like Han, sounds like Barry White.
阿憨的身子，贝利·怀特的声音
Who was that, Han? Do you have a hot, new Korean girlfriend?
跟谁说电话呢，阿憨？新交的性感韩国女朋友吗
Yeah, someone who really likes you and is $1.50 for the first minute and $2 for each additional minute?
是啊，一个在电话上很爱你，首分钟收费1块5，之后每分钟2块的女人吗
I was talking to my mother! So... yes?
我是在跟我妈说电话啦。所以我说的没错喽
I was not talking hot. I was apologizing. She's still angry I left home.
刚不是在调情，是在道歉。她还在气我离家出国
She thinks I'm freewheeling American who takes drugs and has intercourse with dirty Kardashian.
她觉得我现在是游手好闲的美国人，不但嗑药，还跟卡戴珊般的拜金浪女乱搞
Does she know you buy your sweaters at build-a-bear?
她知道你都是去客制小熊店买毛衣的吗
Well, I don't know a lot about the Korean culture,
我是不太了解韩国文化啦
but maybe you should stand up for yourself and stop apologizing to your mother.
不过你应该为自己抗争，别再只是一味地跟你妈道歉啊
Yeah, what do you even have to apologize for? You must have been the easiest birth ever.
对啊，你有什么好道歉的啊？你妈生你时，应该是全世界最轻松的了
She could've coughed you into a catcher's mitt.
她一咳嗽，就能把你喷进棒球手套里
I'm making a cappuccino, you want one?
我要弄杯卡布奇诺，你要喝吗
Nope, I can't have any caffeine.
不行，我体内不能有咖啡因
I have to keep my system clean. I'm doing a drug trial tomorrow.
我明天要去当药物试验自愿者，不能乱吃
Max, not one of those places where they use you as a guinea pig to test for side effects of new drugs that go on the market?
麦克斯，可别是在药物推出市场前帮人实验有何副作用的人体小白鼠吧
Or, as I like to call it, getting paid $500 to, uh, roll the side effects dice and hope it lands on hallucinations.
依我看来更像是轻松赚五百，副作用则凭运气，"产生幻觉"等于中头奖
I would never do something like that. I consider my body a temple.
打死我也不干这种事。我待我身如圣堂
Didn't I see your "temple" eat a bag of flaming hot cheetos two nights ago?
我前两晚貌似看到某人往"圣堂"里供奉了不少特辣膨化食品啊
And that was a huge mistake. I still have a little... Burny heinie.
那人后悔至今。我到现在还有点..."菊"辣如麻
And besides, think of all the people who are lowering their cholesterol safely because of me.
而且，想想我造福了无数病友，让他们安全地降低胆固醇
Or the people who aren't taking Klamitra because of me.
还有救了那些差点就吃"柯拉米插"的人一命
I never heard of Klamitra. You're welcome.
我没听过"柯拉米插"这种药呢。大恩不言谢
I know Klamitra. Sexy black woman who teaches my spin class.
我认识"柯拉米插"，是我健身房的性感黑妞教练
