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Hello. We had a really nice swim. Oh, stop it.
你好啊。我们游得很开心哦。省省吧。
I assume this medical center's already treated the burns on your bottom from the recent pants fire.
我猜医疗中心肯定治好你今天裤子着火屁股被烧伤的地方了吧。
'Cause I'm a liar, liar? That's for the fire marshal to determine.
因为我是骗子吗？这得由消防队长来判定。
You had to tell him? He wore me down. And I was distracted. He has on extra baby powder today.
你非得告诉他吗？他死缠烂打。再加上我意乱情迷，因为他今天用了比较多婴儿爽身粉。
Is he okay? He's still in surgery. Very well.
他没事吧？还在做手术。很好。
He's gonna be all right. That is sticky.
他会没事的。怎么黏糊糊的。
Come on, let's talk about something other than the surgery.
好了，我们聊点手术以外的事情吧。
That's a good idea. Penny, did you and Leonard ever discuss funeral arrangements?
好主意。佩妮，你和莱纳德讨论过葬礼的安排吗？
I think she meant something a little happier.
她是说聊点开心的事情。
I suppose we could try to make it a celebration, but he died so young.
我们是可以当成喜事庆祝一番，可他是英年早逝啊。
Knock, knock. Hi. Hey. What brings you by? Muffin much.
有人吗？好啊。好啊。你们怎么来了？松饼的事儿。
Told you, not funny. He's just not laughing because he's feeling...blue berry. Tough crowd.
告诉过你了。不好笑。他不笑，是因为他感觉"难"莓。好难取悦。
I'm sorry. This is very sweet. Thanks. So, how you doing?
抱歉。你们真好，谢谢。你怎么样了？
Better. I guess the news just hit me a lot harder than I expected.
好点了。这件事情比我想象中给我的打击更大。
Well, of course. I would be devastated if my parents split up.
当然。如果我的父母分手了，我肯定会崩溃。
Why? Your father barely speaks to your mother.
为什么？你父亲几乎不和你母亲说话。
Well, at least he stuck around, not like your dad, who just took off.
至少他还在我们身边，不像你父亲一走了之。
As you can see, we're here to cheer you up.
如你所见，我们是来逗你开心的。
Sorry, Raj. Do you have any sense of what happened with your folks?
抱歉，拉杰。你知道你爸妈是怎么回事吗？
I think, over time, they started to resent each other, and instead of talking about the things that bothered them, they kept it bottled up, and the hate just grew.
日子一天天过去，他们开始互相怨恨。他们没有好好解决两人之间的矛盾，反而将其压在心底，怨恨日渐加深。
It's a shame they spent all that time unhappy. But sometimes, there's muffin you can do about it. You get it, right?
他们在一起的日子一直不开心，真是太可怜了。不过有时候你也无能为"松饼"。我的笑话很逗的，是吧？
Oh, it's nice you got him that.
你真好，还给他带了礼物。
Oh, this isn't for Leonard, no. Amy bought it for me.
这不是给莱纳德的。这是艾米买给我的。
Stubbed his toe on the revolving door on the way in.
进来的时候，他的脚趾头踢到了旋转门。
You know those confounded things make me dizzy.
你知道那些转来转去的事物会让我头晕。
Who told you to keep going around?
谁让你一直跟着门转。
There was a large plant in the lobby. It kept looking like the outside.
大厅里有一株很大的植物，老让我觉得那是外边。
Okay, listen, when Leonard comes out, he is not gonna feel great, so, please don't give him a hard time.
听我说，莱纳德出来的时候他肯定会不太好受，所以请别让他更难受。
Penny has a good point. This is like the man in the supermarket with the goiter on his neck. Whatever you're thinking, just keep it to yourself.
佩妮说得对。他就像在超市里遇到的那个脖子上有甲状腺肿的人。不管你心里怎么想，不要说出来。
It was like a grapefruit. And I'm sure he knew that before you held a grapefruit up next to it.
肿得像个葡萄柚。人家自己心里知道，不需要你拿个葡萄柚去他脖子旁比较。
Well, I'm not making any promises. Not only did Leonard take what I feel is an unnecessary risk, he deceived me.
我可不敢保证什么。莱纳德不仅做了我认为无用的危险之事，他还欺骗了我。
Okay, the reason he deceived you is you were being a pain in the ass.
他欺骗你是因为你让人蛋疼。
The reason I was being a pain in the B is because I was worried about him, and no one else was.
我会这么烦人是因为我担心他，而你们都不担心。
Really? You won't even say "A"? You bet your sweet B I won't.
不是吧，"蛋"疼你都说不出口？打死我都不说这词。
Obviously, I care about Leonard. I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with him.
我当然关心莱纳德。我会和他一起度过余生呢。
And I'm not?
我就不会吗？
It's an earthquake. I knew it. Sheldon, it was just a little tremor.
是地震。我就知道。谢尔顿，只是小小的震动。
A little tremor that turns routine sinus surgery into a frontal lobotomy.
小小的震动就会把普通的鼻窦手术变成危险的额叶切除手术。
Oh, I don't care for this at all. Oh, I need to see he's okay.
我才不管什么地震呢，我要去看看他怎么样了。
Sheldon, you can't go back there. Try and stop me!
谢尔顿，你不能进去。来啊，拦着我啊！
Are you okay? Why didn't you stop me? !
你没事吧？为什么不拦着我？！
Can I tell you something? This whole thing with Raj's parents just got me a little worried about us.
我能跟你说点事吗？拉杰父母的事情让我有点担心我们。
What are you talking about? We're fine. And Raj's parents probably split up because of Raj.
你说什么呢？我们很好啊。拉杰父母会分手有可能是因为拉杰。
What? ! They always say the children aren't to blame, but...Come on.
什么？！人们总说不该怪孩子，但是...这人啊。
I'm not joking, Howie. You heard what he said about his parents. It was the little things they kept bottled up. I don't want that to happen to us.
我不是开玩笑，华仔。你也听到了他说的他父母的事情。都是些小事，积压久了便爆发。我可不想我们变成那样。
How can I convince you it won't?
你怎么才肯相信我们不会？
Well, is there anything about me you're keeping inside?
你对我有什么意见没有说出来的吗？
I'm not answering that. It's a trap.
我不会回答的。这是个陷阱。
So there are things you don't like.
就是说你对我有意见。
And here I am in the trap. You just keep talking. I'm gonna chew my leg off.
我已经踩进陷阱夹里了。你继续说，我要啃断腿来逃生了。
Just tell me one thing that bothers you, and I promise I won't get mad.
就告诉我一件你不满意的事，我保证不生气。
Okay. The truth is...sometimes...you're too...beautiful. Howie, be serious.
好吧。事实上有时候...你太过...美丽。华仔，严肃点。
Okay, okay. I really don't like how your wings poke me when we sleep 'cause you're an angel.
好吧，好吧。我实在不喜欢睡觉时被你的翅膀戳醒，因为你是坠落凡间的天使。
Okay, fine, maybe it was a bad idea.
好吧，也许这个提议不怎么样。
I just don't think the secret to a happy marriage is going out of our way to criticize each other. Although, there are ways to improve our communication.
我只是不觉得幸福婚姻的秘诀是互相批评对方。不过，要加强沟通的方法很多。
One thing I learned when I was in couples therapy was...Who were you in couples therapy with?
我曾经在伴侣心理治疗那里学到过...你和谁一起去的伴侣心理治疗？
Not important. Was it your mom? Not important. It was your mom.
这不重要。是和你妈吗？这不重要。所以是和你妈了。
Anyway, the therapist had us tell each other what we loved about one another.
总之，治疗师让我们互相倾诉喜欢对方的哪一点。
Oh, that's so sweet! I want to do that. All right.
这方法好贴心！我想试试这个。好啊。
Okay, um...I love that you make me laugh.
那么...我喜欢你能逗我开心。
Thank you. And I love that you're strong and independent.
谢谢。我喜欢你自强又自立。
And yet, I still love when you hold a door for me.
但我也喜欢你会帮我撑着门。
I love that I'm kind of a slob around here, and...you're okay with that.
我喜欢我在家里好吃懒做...你却毫不介意。
Uh-huh. And I love that I work and do all the cleaning, and you're okay with that.
呵呵。我喜欢我又得工作又得做家务你却毫不介意。
See, I am. Isn't this great?
我还真不介意。这方法好极了对不对？
Come on, smile. This is gonna be my Christmas card.
快点，笑一个。我要用这照片当今年的圣诞卡。
You know this is all your fault. How is it my fault?
这都是你的错。怎么是我的错？
I told you not to get the surgery.
我告诉你别去做手术了。
Okay, first of all, the surgery was a success, and secondly, I didn't even want you there.
首先，手术非常成功。其次，我根本不想要你去。
I don't know which hurts worse-- my nose or my heart. Well, I'm done speaking to you.
我不知道哪里更痛，我的鼻子还是我的心。够了，我不想跟你说话了。
Don't be like that. You two need to talk this out. Yeah, 'cause you sound really funny.
别这样。你们俩必须谈清楚。没错，因为你俩声音太搞笑了。
Sheldon, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the surgery, but you were worried about nothing.
谢尔顿，我为没告诉你手术的事道歉，但你根本是瞎操心。
Oh, you're hardly out of the woods, no. You still run the risk of infection, a blood clot, the possibility that an inattentive surgeon let a barn spider lay eggs in your nose.
你别以为自己脱离险境了。你还有可能手术感染，出现血栓，还有手术疏忽使得蜘蛛爬进你的鼻子产卵的风险。
The minute you sneeze web, I'm moving out.
你只要擤出蜘蛛网来，我立马就搬家。
I never thought I'd say these words, but come on, nose spider!
我从没想过自己会说这些话，拜托你快来吧，鼻蜘蛛！
Who are you kidding? You were so panicked Leonard was gonna die, you'll never leave him.
别开玩笑了。你多害怕莱纳德会死啊，你永远离不开他的。
Sheldon will move out eventually. Yeah, once he figures out how to work a door.
谢尔顿终究会搬出去的。没错，等他学会如何开门以后。
I was not panicked, and I am not overly attached to Leonard.
我没有害怕，我也不依赖莱纳德。
You were so worried that you smashed your face trying to check on me. You love me.
你担心得不顾自己破相都要进来看我。你是爱我滴。
Yeah. Tell me those aren't the words of a man with a spider eating its way through his brain. Amy, you're a neuroscientist. Crack his skull open, spray some Raid in there.
你们说这人是不是脑子被蜘蛛啃了才能说出这种话来。艾米，你是神经学家。把他的头颅砸开，洒点杀虫剂进去。
I love that you take pride in your looks, even when I have to pee in the morning, and you're in there spending an hour on your hair.
我喜欢你总喜欢精心打扮，就算是我早上尿急的时候，你也能在厕所花费1小时梳头。
I love that you're too good to pee in the kitchen sink.
我喜欢你太娇贵不肯在厨房水槽尿尿的态度。
I love that you have the confidence to speak, even without giving it an ounce of thought.
我喜欢你有完全不过脑子就高谈阔论的那种自信。
And I love how your hair is always on the soap. It's like washing myself with a hamster.
我喜欢你头发全都沾在香皂上，搞得我像捏着只仓鼠洗澡一样。
Hey, guys. Sorry I am so late. I was on the phone with my mother.
两位，抱歉我来晚了。我刚才跟我妈通电话呢。
Oh, how is she?
她怎么样了？
Pretty good. She bought the book Eat, Pray, Love and used it to set my father's Mercedes on fire. So, what's up with you guys?
还不错。她买了本《饭?祷?爱》，然后用它把我爸的奔驰烧了。你们俩在干嘛呢？
We're just saying all the things we love about each other.
我们在聊喜欢对方的哪些地方。
Oh, like you and I did at couples therapy.
哇，咱俩在伴侣心理治疗时也做过。
Ooh, what'd you get? Oh, I ordered it before your surgery. It's the urn I was going to put you in.
你买了什么啊？我在你手术前订的，是准备安置你的骨灰坛。
Okay, that's morbid. Send it back.
这太变态了。把它退回去。
I can't send it back. I had it engraved. "Here lie the ashes of Leonard Hofstadter. He thought he was right, but his roommate knew better."
这不能退货，我字都刻好了。"莱纳德?霍夫斯塔德长眠于此。他自以为是，却不及室友睿智。"
That's funny. Boy, I'm gonna miss these painkillers.
这个好笑。老天，我会想念这些让人嗨的止痛药。
Hey, why did you get two? "I'm with stupid." Oh, that one's mine.
你干嘛买两个？"我旁边那货是笨蛋。" 那个是我的。
