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1995 has been a big year for the Huang family.
1995年，对黄家来说是不平凡的一年
We moved from D.C. To Orlando
我们从华盛顿搬去奥兰多
because of my dad wanted to open his own restaurant.
因为我老爸想开一间他自己的餐厅
Eat up, my babies.
放开吃吧，宝贝们
...but my brother Eddie wasn't happy.
但我哥哥艾迪不开心
'lot of white folks here.'
这里全是白人
My brother Emery
但另一个哥哥埃默里却混的
made friends easily, though.
如鱼得水
'I love love.'
爱情万岁
And guess who became a real-estate agent.
猜猜谁成为了地产经纪人
'your mommy, that's who.
你老妈我
Boom!'
砰
Anyway, have a good summer, Curtis.
不管怎样，暑假快乐
Your friend, Evan Huang."
你的盆友，埃文·黄
And who do I make this out to?
这个该写谁呢
I can't believe you're graduating.
真想不到你都快毕业了
So stoked
超级期待
For high school, to spend the summer with my mom.
我的高中生活，暑假跟老妈在一起
She deejays at the Radisson.
她在雷迪森酒店当DJ
Oh. Good for her.
噢，不错
Good luck surviving the 7th grade next year.
祝贺大家成功熬过七年级
See you around the neighborhood.
回见
Oh! What if you got a tattoo?
噢，你要是纹身了怎么办呢
No good
那可不好
I might want to be Jewish someday.
说不定哪天我皈依犹太教了
What are you guys talking about?
大伙在说什么呐
Summer vacation.
暑假
We have to come back next year wearing fresh gear
下学年可得穿戴一新啊
or with an awesome story.
或者有牛可吹
Or we'll be stuck eating lunch with the janitor all year.
不然午饭时就只有跟看门人坐在一起了
Did you know he's writing a musical about new jersey?
你们知道他在写部关于新泽西的音乐剧吗
'cause you will.
你们总会知道的
Better have proof to back up your story,
吹牛得有根据
or you'll wind up like "Fake" Kate Anderson.
不然你会跟说假话的凯特安德森一个下场
And we walked into Dollywood, and I saw dolly's house.
我们去了多莱坞，我看见了多莉之家
Liar! Where are your souvenirs?
大话精，纪念品呢
She eventually went to Dollywood over Christmas break,
她最终在圣诞节去了多莱坞
But it was too late.
但为时已晚
Yo, I know this already. I'm set.
我早知道这回事了，我想好了
Is your family going on vacation?
你一家人一起去度假吗
Ohh, that's funny.
哦，你真逗
I used the money I made working weekends
我用之前在我爹餐馆
at my dad's restaurant to buy something awesome.
挣的钱买了点宝贝
Let's just say I'm pumped for the fall.
这么说吧，我已经准备好在秋季学期大展身手了
yeah new '95 Reebok pumps.
最新95锐步气囊鞋
Check it.
瞅瞅
Magic. Science.
神奇啊，科学
I'mma show up on the first day of 7th grade
七年级第一天我就要秀一秀
Fresh as hell.
全新出场
So, what are you gonna do all summer?
整个暑假你打算干嘛
You are looking at it.
躺在沙发上
We interrupt this music video with breaking news.
MTV暂停一下我们要插播一条爆炸新闻
John Stockton has been seen wearing Reebok pumps.
约翰·斯托克顿被发现脚穿最新锐步气囊鞋
I repeat, John Stockton has been seen wearing Reebok pumps.
我重复一下约翰·斯托克顿被发现脚穿最新锐步气囊鞋
Come on, son!
加把劲，小子
Better give those to your dad or your white neighbor,
最好把鞋送给你老爹或者你的白人邻居
'cause they over.
因为这鞋已经过气了
Happy labor day, hunter.
劳动节快乐，小子
You don't need so many suits.
你用不着这么多西装
The convention is only two days.
会议只有两天
All the franchise power players are gonna be there.
所有的经营商大人物都会去的
I need to make a good impression.
我得闪亮登场
"Which one's Louis Huang?
谁是路易斯·黄
Oh, he's the steakhouse owner in the sharkskin suit."
噢，他就是那个穿着鲨鱼皮西装的牛排店主
Or "He's the Chinese guy."
或者那个“中国佬”
In the sharkskin suit.
“穿着鲨鱼皮西装”
Mommy, guess what.
妈咪，猜猜怎么着
My last baby tooth is loose.
我最后一颗乳牙松了
Oh, looks like it's time for another visit
哦看来牙仙又要
From the tooth fairy.
来找你了
Evan, clean your room. The tooth fairy.
埃文，打扫打扫房间吧，牙仙
I look forward to the fairy's constructive criticism.
我期待着牙仙的建设性意见
Mom, when can we go back-to-school shopping?
妈咪，什么时候能去为上学买点东西啊
Right now!
现在
Emery, here's Eddie's old clothes.
埃默里，这儿有些埃迪的旧衣服
Evan, here's Emery's.
埃文，这儿是埃默里的
I've got some good stuff in there.
我有些好东西
You're gonna love it.
你会喜欢的
What are these?
神马玩意儿
No more Velcro. You're old enough for laces now.
不再穿魔术贴了，你们长这么大可以系鞋带了
No more Velcro, your last baby tooth
不再穿魔术贴了，你的最后一颗乳牙都
Congratulations. You're in the big-kid club.
祝贺你，你是大孩子了
But I'm the baby. "Baby Evan"?
但我还是宝宝呢，埃文宝宝
It's my brand.
这是我的招牌
Mom, I'm begging you—I need new school gear.
妈咪，求求你了，我需要返校新装备
It starts in a week, and I have nothing!
只有一周了，我还啥都没有呢
I already bought you new T-shirts for school,
我已经给你买了新T恤了
The kind you like—with black men on them.
你喜欢的那种，有黑人在上面的
These guys aren't rappers!
这些黑人不是说唱歌手
They were the gangsters of the sales bin.
打折的只有这个
Jessica, I can't find my suspenders.
杰西卡，我的背带找不到了
In the closet!
在柜子里
Ready for book club?
准备好去读书俱乐部了吗
White wine and "Misery"!
酒和书
It's Chablis. Don't be pissed.
那是夏布利酒，别生气
Thank you. Okay.
谢谢，好吧
I haven't even started it.
我都还没开始呢
With work and the house
工作还有家里的事
And then the kids being home all summer, I just—
孩子们整个暑假都在家里，我
You know, you should really think about getting away.
你知道，你应该想想自己清净清净了
I can't just leave them, honey.
你知道我不能离开他们，亲
Although, I have thought about it—
虽然，我也想过
Just packing a bag and just getting out of here.
带个小包包就离开
There's this town in south Texas.
在得克萨斯南边有个小镇
I would paint portraits, get a st. Bernard,
我可以去那画画，弄条圣伯纳犬
Rebuild a muscle car.
改装一辆美国肌肉车
N-no. I didn't mean you should abandon your family.
不，我没叫你抛夫弃子
I meant you should just consider taking them
我的意思是可以带他们一起度个假
On a little vacation.
一起度个假
Vacation.
度假
You're funny.
你真搞笑
Louis and I don't believe in vacations.
路易斯和我不是度假的人
Hey, boss, do we get vacation days?
嘿，老板，我们有假期吗
Your job is a vacation—from poverty.
你有工作的每一天都是假期，不会穷死节
I still can't find my suspenders!
我还是找不到我的背带
Suspender
背带
Working-man accessory.
中产阶级必备
Holds up the business.
商业人士形象
Louis, your suspenders are right here,
路易斯，你的背带就在这儿
Next to your—
靠着你的
So, big business trip, huh?
出差吗
National franchise convention—
全国特许经营商大会
Biggest in central Florida.
弗罗里达中部最大的会议
They say that's where the burger man
据说汉堡大叔就是在那
Became the burger king.
成为汉堡王的
Okay, so, if this is a business trip,
好吧，如果是出差
Why did you pack your swimsuit?
为什么带泳裤
There's a pool at the hotel,
酒店有个泳池
And a lot of meetings happen there.
很多会就在酒店开
To put under my back.
用来放松背部
I'll be on my feet all day long at seminars.
整天会议都得站着呢
And it's being held at gator world?
全部都在鳄鱼世界开
Gator world, the home of the scariest ride
在弗罗里达那个鳄鱼世界吗
In Florida, "The death roll"?!
狂野人士之家，死亡过山车
jumpin', bumpin', thrivin' gators
跳吧，跳吧，鳄鱼们
rides and shows and alligators
鳄鱼表演好好看
grab the family, come on down
带上家人一起来吧
you better swim, or you might drown
使劲游呀游，小心沉下去
This is gonna save my entire 7th grade year!
这个能拯救我的七年级
Can we please, please, please go on vacation to gator world?
我们能不能能不能能不能，去鳄鱼世界度假
I thought we didn't believe in vacations, Louis?
我记得我们不度假的，路易斯
This isn't a vacation. It's a business trip.
没有假期，是出差，公干
The conference is at the hotel next to gator world.
会议在紧邻鳄鱼世界的一个酒店开
It has nothing to do with the park itself.
跟公园本身没啥关系
Okay, fine.
好吧
If this is a business trip,
如果是出差
Then you won't mind if we come with you.
那你不会介意我跟着吧
Yeah, if you want.
当然如果你想的话
But I'll be in back-to-back seminars all day.
但我整天都是连轴转的会
Oh, we can entertain ourselves.
别担心，我们会自娱自乐
Everybody, pack your bags.
大家伙，整理行装
We're going on a family business trip.
我们集体家庭出差
Yeah!
耶
Yeah.
耶
"The death roll"? Sounds like a violent ride.
死亡过山车，听上去很残暴
That's the point, son.
这就是重点啊，小子
If you live,
如果你活下来了
You get an "I survived 'the death roll'" T-shirt.
你就会得到一件印着“我战胜了死亡过山车”的T恤
That's my key to flossin' through 7th grade.
这不就是我完美度过七年级的关键吗
Oh, how sweet. Some of my friends have come to say bye to me.
噢，多好啊，我的朋友来和我道别了
I'll write you every day.
我会每天给你写信的
Off I-4, gator world, come and soar
鳄鱼世界，自由翱翔
chomp, chomp, gator world
嚼呀，嚼呀，鳄鱼世界
These guys aren't with the convention.
这些家伙不是一起来开会的
Must be college kids.
肯定是大学生
Franchisees in the house!
特许经营人都到齐啦
Welcome to gator world hotel and resort.
欢迎来到鳄鱼酒店度假胜地
I'm gator Carol. How can I help you today?
我是鳄鱼卡罗尔，有什么能帮您的吗
Hi. Reservation for Louis Huang.
嗨，有一个路易斯·黄的预订
And how many people will be staying in the room?
请问您是几个人住这间房呢
How many people are allowed to stay in the room
请问在不用被征收额外费用的条件下
Before we incur an additional charge?
最多可以住多少人呢
Two adults and two children.
两个大人和两个小孩
That's how many will be staying in the room.
我们就是这么多人
These two are just visitors—family in the area.
这两个是游客，家人都在这边
We're just catching up.
我们只是刚好聊聊天
Mm.
嗯
Well, if you're staying with the conference,
好吧，如果你们是前来开会的
Then you can upgrade to the executive suite
你们可以把房间升级到行政套房
For just $20 more.
只需要加二十美金
I bet we can. No, thank you.
我知道，但是我们不想，谢谢
See, that's how they get you—all these additional fees.
看，他们就是这样宰你的，一堆额外收费
Okay, Mr. Huang.
好吧，黄先生
I see you've booked a spa massage
我看到你预订了一个水疗服务
And a dinner reservation at Csonka's steakhouse?
和一顿琼卡牛排餐厅的晚餐
N-no, that's a mistake.
不，不，你肯定搞错了
Okay.
好吧
It shows here that you called ahead
但是记录显示您之前打过电话
To request the end cut of the prime rib?
预订了一份顶级牛肋排的尾部
Mm...nope, must be someone else.
嗯，从没有过，肯定是别人订的
You faxed over a copy of your credit card
您还把您的信用卡和驾照复印件
And your driver's license to hold the reservation.
传真过来保留预订
Data breach.
数据漏洞
Clear identity theft.
肯定是信息泄露了
Gator Ramone can take your bags. Okay.
鳄鱼拉莫内会帮您把包提上去，好吗
Oh, I know what you want.
噢，我知道你就是想这样
Dollar-dollar bag, right? No, thank you.
提包小费，对吧，不用了，谢谢
We are fine.
我们自己来
Mommy, bao-bao.
妈咪，抱，抱
Pick you up? You can walk.
抱你，你自己能走的
Bao-bao.
抱抱
We are gonna get our money's worth.
我们要让每一分钱都花得物超所值
hey, little suckers, I know you hear me callin'
嘿，小傻瓜，我知道你听到了我的电话
on the hood of your wick-wack low-ridin' cadillac
在你那弱爆了低底盘凯迪拉克上
act like, you know and we are not gonna be suckers.
就像是，你知道的我们绝不能吃亏
the masta ace don't play when it comes to my bass
鲁班也不敢在我面前弄斧
aahhhh, check it out, baby, check it out, y'all
啊啊啊，快来听，宝贝，快来听，快来听
check it out, baby, check it out, y'all
快来听，宝贝，快来听，快来听
check it out, baby
快来听，宝贝
I was born to roll
我生来就是这么屌
Mom, can we go to gator world now?
妈妈，我们现在可以去鳄鱼世界了吗
Later. We have to go to the pool first.
晚点去，我们要先去游泳池
Oh, I guess you won't be able to come, Louis,
噢，我猜你不能来了，路易斯
Because you'll be too busy with business.
因为你的工作太忙了
That's right. Lots of business.
没错，工作太忙了
Do you want me to call the DMV for you,
还是说你想我帮你打给车管局
The credit-card company—
信用卡公司
You know, about your identity theft?
你知道的，你的信息不是泄露了吗
Um, yeah. That'll be great.
嗯，好啊，那就多谢你了
As long as you don't mind paying for local calls.
只要你不介意回到家后要交本地电话费
When we get home, then.
那就等回家再打
Hm, okay.
嗯，好的
Hi. I'm gator Octavio. Towel?
嘿，我是鳄鱼奥克塔维奥，要毛巾吗
Oh, so you can charge us a towel-rental fee?
噢，所以你就能收我们毛巾费是吗
No, thank you.
不需要了，谢谢
We will be using god's towel—the sun.
我们可以用上帝赐予的毛巾，阳光
Go.
你走吧
Thousand-year-old black egg with tofu
皮蛋拌豆腐
And grass jelly drink.
以及仙草冻饮料
Wait 20 minutes to go in the pool.
等二十分钟再去游泳池
Mom, when can we go to gator world?
妈妈，我们什么时候可以去鳄鱼世界啊
I said, "Later."
我说过了，待会
Um, if you're gonna bring outside food here,
嗯，如果你们要外带食物进来
I have to charge you.
我就要多收费哦
Now—we can go now.
我们现在就走
Chomp, chomp, gator world.
嚼啊，嚼啊，鳄鱼世界
Hey, help here, please.
嘿，麻烦帮帮这里
Tickets.
出示门票
We're staying in the hotel.
我们是酒店住客
Hotel is separate.
酒店和我们是分开的
You got to buy tickets to get into the park.
要进公园就要买票
Except for our handi-capable friends—
除了我们身残志坚的朋友
You can come on in for free.
你可以免门票
Fine. How much are tickets?
好吧，门票多少钱
$55 for adults. $45 for kids.
大人55美元，小朋友45美元
$2 off if you bring your own cat to feed to the gators.
如果你带自家猫来喂鳄鱼，有两美元优惠
That's ridiculous.
太可笑了
What kind of sucker would pay those inflated prices?
傻子才会付这么多钱呢
I'll have an order of the $20 hot wings
我要一份二十美元的香辣鸡翅
And another round of bud lights.
再上多一轮淡啤
For a few dollars more,
再加多几元钱的话
You can upgrade to the collector cups.
你就能加大杯哟
Mm...
嗯
Do it.
就这么办
Kids 5 and under get in free.
五岁以下的孩子免费
They're all 5 and under.
他们都不到五岁
These two are 5 and under.
这两个不到五岁
This one is 5 and under.
这个孩子不到五岁
Nice try, kid.
精神可嘉，孩子
But you're wearing sneakers with laces.
可是你穿的是系带的运动鞋
Good eye, gator Dan.
你眼神真好，鳄鱼丹
Can't get anything past this guy.
什么东西都绕不过你对吧
But, mom, I need to go on that ride!
但是妈妈，我想去坐过山车
Okay, calm down. We'll go on a ride.
好，淡定，我们这就去坐
Parking lot "C."
C停车场
Parking lot "Crocodile."
鳄鱼停车场
Parking lot "C."
C停车场
This is just as fun as any ride in there.
这跟坐那里面的过山车一样有意思
Aah!
啊
Whoo!
哇哦
And then I said, "Hey, I don't need
然后我说，嘿，我并不需要
Your tax advice, Scottie Pippen."
你的纳税建议，斯科蒂·皮蓬
What are you doing here?!
你们在这干什么呢
Melanie! Jessica! Louise?!
梅兰妮，杰西卡，路易斯
Rebecca! Janice! Gloria!
贝利卡，珍妮丝，格洛丽亚
I thought you were supposed to be at the convention center.
我以为你应该会在会议中心
Oh, heh, well, uh, some of the guys here, they—
哦是啊，嗯，我的几个朋友来了，他们
You are ruining my vacation!
你毁了我的假期
I knew this was a vacation! I knew it!
我就知道你是在度假，我就知道
Well, you got me, Jessica. You win.
好吧，你逮着我了，杰西卡，你赢了
For two days a year, I drink bud lights,
一年里只有这两天，我能喝点酒
Play tennis, and eat hot wings.
打打网球，吃点鸡翅
Moving to the white suburbs has made you soft.
我们搬到白人区以后你变得越来越不务正业了
Woman, I've been soft!
我一直都不务正业
I've been taking business trips for years,
我已经去过很多次商务旅行了
Ever since I worked at Steve's furniture store in D.C.—
自从我在华盛顿史蒂夫的家具店工作开始
The mattress expo in Philly, the credenza-con in Delaware.
费城的床垫博览会，特拉华州的书橱展览
The upholstery seminars in Montreal?
蒙特利尔的家具研讨会
Oui.
是的
Boys, your mother and I need to talk. Go to your rooms.
儿子们，我要和你们妈妈谈谈，回房间去
I didn't tell you because I know...
我没告诉你这事是因为我知道
...you think vacations are a waste of time.
你觉得度假就是浪费生命
Well, I thought you thought that, too!
对，我以为你也是这么想的
Well, I need this.
我需要放假
A couple days away recharges me.
放假的时候我能给自己充充电
It's how I stay so positive.
这就是我能一直这么有活力的原因
Oh, so, you think I don't need a break, too?
你觉得我并不需要休息吗
The difference is I can't just check out for a few days
我们的区别就在于，我根本不能完完全全的放松几天
Or our whole family would fall apart!
否则我们的整个家就会垮掉
That's not true.
不是这样的
You can loosen the reins a little.
你可以少管我们一点
We'll be fine. No, that's what you think.
我们都会很好的，不，这只是你的想法
But if I do—oh. What?
可如果我这么做了，哦，会怎样
We splurge a bit? Spend a little money?
我们会更挥霍一些，多花点钱
We can afford to.
我们负担得起的
It's a part of being on vacation.
这就是度假的一部分
Preach it, big man.
接着说，老大
Look, we work hard all year,
你想想，我们一直都在努力工作
No one harder than you.
没人比你更辛苦了
Just let go for a day and relax.
就放松一天吧
I don't know how to relax.
我不知道要怎么放松
It seems like a waste of time.
这就好像在浪费时间
I could be marinating meat or driving.
我可以腌点肉或者开开车
It's easy. I'll show you.
很简单，我来告诉你
First...
首先
Oh, aah. Oh, no, no, no, no.
哦，啊，哦，不不不不
No, no, no, no, no.
不不不不别动
I know it's free, but it's freezing in here.
我知道这是免费的，但这里面冷的跟广寒宫一样
You see, a part of being on vacation is enjoying yourself.
你看，享受生活是假期的一部分
I'm gonna book you a massage at the spa.
我去给你预定一个水疗
No, don't! Uhp-bup!
不，不要
Loosen the reins, remember?
少管一点事情，记得吗
Let me handle this.
让我来处理
Now, you put on the hotel robe and slippers.
现在，穿上你的浴袍和拖鞋
Go on.
去呀
Boys.
儿子们
Remember that piece of paper your mother burned?
记得你们妈妈烧了的那张纸吗
That's something called room service.
那东西叫客房服务菜单
I'm gonna show you how it works.
我来教你们怎么用它
Dad, can I go to gator world?
爸爸，我可以去鳄鱼世界吗
Of course you can.
当然可以
I'm in charge of the vacation now.
现在我来负责安排我们的假期
Whoo!
哇哦
I want to stay here and learn room service.
我想留在这里了解一下客房服务
That's fine.
很好
I can go by myself.
我可以自己去
The park's just across the street.
那个公园就在街对面
Well, I drove a bus when I was 11,
嗯，我十一岁的时候就会开公交车了
So I'm fine with that.
所以我同意
What about you, Evan?
埃文，你呢
What does it matter?
有什么关系呢
Every step we take in our non-velcro shoes
我们穿着没有魔术贴的鞋子每走一步
Is another step towards the grave.
就离死亡近了一步
Great, so Evan will stay here, too.
很好，埃文也留在房间里
Welcome, Jessica.
欢迎光临，杰西卡
Now, before we get started,
现在在我们开始之前
Do you have any injuries that—
你有没有哪些地方受伤了...
Oh.
噢
Um, you're supposed to take your clothes off
嗯，你趴在按摩垫之前应该
Before you get under the sheet.
先把衣服脱了
Why? So you can go through my pockets?
为什么，这样你就好搜我的口袋了么
Are you holding your purse?
你是在抓着你的手提袋吗
Yes.
是的
I'm just gonna take your purse, okay?
我来帮你拿开手提袋，好吗
No. And I'm gonna put it right here on the floor
不好，我把它放在旁边的地上
So you can see it through your face hole.
这样你可以透过脸洞看到它
Just let go, Jessica.
放手吧，杰西卡
I can't. I can't let go! Just let go.
我不能，我不能放手，放手吧
I ca—
我不
Thank you.
谢谢
And press.
然后播放
Is that John Tesh?
是约翰·泰斯的歌吗
No, it's an underwater recording of humpback whales singing.
不是，是一段座头鲸唱歌时的水下录音
Why would whales be singing?
鲸鱼为什么要唱歌
To communicate their joy.
为了表达它们的喜悦
What do you do for joy, Jessica?
你会做些什么来愉悦自己呢，杰西卡
I micromanage my family.
我微控我的家庭
Well, I think the whales are happy because they're free.
嗯，我觉得鲸鱼因自由而快乐
But they're so fat.
但是它们那么肥
Not in the sea.
在海里不算什么
Underwater, they're weightless—
在水下它们都很轻
Weightless and free.
轻盈又自由
They are free.
它们是自由的
There we go.
好好享受
They sing...
它们唱歌
Because they are happy and free.
因为它们快乐又自由
I want to—you're standing in front of my purse a little.
我想...你站到我手提包前面一点了
I can't see it.
我看不见它了
Oh. Sorry.
噢，抱歉
That's better. Thank you.
好多了，谢谢
Just need that t-shirt.
要的就是这件T恤
John Tesh. Nice.
约翰·泰斯，不错嘛
I take it you enjoyed your massage.
我猜你很享受你的按摩
I love being on vacation.
我爱度假
I just wish we didn't have to go home.
要是我们不用回家就好了
Well, that's how you know you enjoyed yourself.
嗯，这样你才会知道自己有多享受
Now, you head up to the room and take a long bath.
现在你回房间好好泡个澡
I'll check out for us.
我来结账
I'm proud of you.
真为你骄傲
You learned how to relax.
你学会了怎么放松
What the hell is this?!
这他妈是什么东西
Is there a problem with your bill?
您的账单出了什么问题吗
Of course there's something wrong with my bill!
我的账单当然出问题了
Why is it so high?!
为什么这么高
Well, it is for six people, sir.
嗯，是六个人的，先生
"A-a additional occupancy fee, resort fee, share fee"?
额外住宿费，酒店服务费，分担费
Oh, those are our hidden fees.
噢，这是我们的隐性费用
That's how we get ya!
这样我们才能宰您啊
Well, what's a—$60 for a poolside hairdo?
嗯，池边美发费，六十美金是什么回事
Hm.
哼嗯
Hidden fees. That's how they get you.
隐性费用，他们就是这样宰你的
I didn't do the math! I'm on vacation!
我没有算费用，我在度假
So am I, so I couldn't protect you from this.
我也在度假，所以我没法保护你不上当
You're watching out for us so I don't have to.
你在替我们把关，所以我才不用操心
I can be me because I have you.
因为有你，我才能做我自己
Give me the bill.
把账单给我
Hello.
你好
So, I was just going through our bill,
嗯，我刚看了一遍我们的账单
And we will not be paying any of your hidden fees.
而且我们将不会支付任何一项你们的隐性费用
Ma'am, you can't choose what part you pay.
女士，你不能选择你支付哪部分
Yes, I can.
是的，我能
Tell them what happened, baby.
告诉他们发生什么了，宝贝
I was running by the pool
我在泳池边跑
'cause there's no lifeguard on duty.
因为他们没有救生员在场
And no posted signage. And no posted signage.
也没有张贴标识，也没有张贴标识
And I fell.
然后我就摔倒了
And my tooth was knocked out of my head.
然后我的一颗牙齿摔飞了
Oh, my god.
噢，我的天呐
Your bill didn't include my child-disfigurement fee.
你的账单里没有包含我孩子毁容的费用
And that's how I get you.
我就是这么赢你们的
Oh, we also have AAA, so it's another 10% off.
噢，我们也有三A级信用，打个九折吧
I can't believe you got the hotel charges reduced.
难以置信，你竟然能让酒店少收钱了
You are on a different level.
你完全是另一个级别啊
Good job, my baby.
好样的，宝贝
Thanks, mommy.
谢谢，妈咪
The baby is back.
宝贝回来啦
Was that true? Did you
这是真的吗，你真的
really fall by the pool and lose your tooth?
在泳池边摔倒了然后把牙摔飞了吗
No. Mom ripped it out with her hands.
不是，是妈妈用手拔掉的
Hey...
嘿
I died, and they brought me back!
我死了，然后他们把我扛回来了
Aw, hell no!
啊，鬼才去呢
So, we were cliff-diving off the coast
嗯，我们在海岸上跳水
When I saw them in the water—sharks.
当我在水里看到它们的时候，鲨鱼们
I grabbed my harpoon—
我抓住我的鱼叉
Dude, that's, like, a baby tooth.
伙计，那就像颗小孩的乳齿
What? No.
什么，才不是
It's a tooth from a hammerhead shark.
这是颗锤头鲨的牙齿
They're smaller a-and flatter.
它们更小，也更平滑
More like a "Babyhead" Shark.
更像只“婴儿头”鲨
"Babyhead."
“婴儿头”
Okay, fine.
好吧，好吧
I didn't do anything this summer
我这个暑假什么也没做
Except for sit around and play video games.
除了干坐着和玩电子游戏
That's cool. Nicole?
那挺酷的，妮可
What are you doing here?
你在这干嘛呢
I have to repeat the 8th grade.
我得再读一年八年级
Partied too much with my mom and blew off summer school.
和我妈妈派对太多了还旷了暑期学校
Wish I'd done nothing like you.
真希望我没像你那样
You know this kid?
你认识这个小孩
Yeah, he's my friend.
是的，他是我朋友
You just chilled at home. I like it.
你就在家乖乖待着，挺好的
You're like... "Chill" Eddie.
你就像，“乖宝”艾迪
"Somebody stop me!"
“拦住我”
From what?
拦住你干什么
No, what—no. It's...
不是，什么，不，是
"Smokin'!"
抽烟
The Mask.
《变相怪杰》
Jim Carrey,
金·凯瑞
"Smokin'!"
抽烟
