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You are here on a great day. I am here. J. Lo is here.
今天很美好啊 我在这里 J. Lo也来了
Whole bunch of gifts are here.
还有很多礼物呢
That is later in the show.
那个我们晚点再说
Right now, there's something else I want to talk about.
现在 我想说点别的
And if you want to, you should listen.
如果你们愿意 你们应该听听
So the other day, this woman named Kim posted this on Facebook.
前几天 一位名叫Kim的女子在脸书上发了这个
She found a McCall's Magazine article from 1958, and the article was "129 Ways to Get a Husband."
她找到了1958年McCall's杂志上的一篇文章 标题是“找老公的129种方法”
And I thought, well, I should read it. I still haven't found a man.
我觉得我应该看一下 毕竟我还没老公呢
So I asked her to send it to me, and here it is.
所以我让她把杂志发给了我 就是这个
It's quite tattered. This is from 1958. I'm also from 1958.
烂的不像样子了 它是1958年的 我也是1958年生的
I've held up better than this magazine, I think.
我保养的比这份杂志好
So anyway. And I don't think it's a coincidence there's a cat.
总之呢 这上面有只猫 这不是巧合
The year I was born, there's a cat on the cover of this.
我出生的那一年 这个封面上有只猫
And I am the inventor of Cat Week, so that's so weird.
而我是猫周的发明人 好怪哦
Anyway, so I read the article, which I wouldn't have been able to do in 1958,
总之 我看了这篇文章 要换成1958年 我肯定看不了
because women were not allowed to read.
因为那时候女性还不能识字
And I was a baby, also.
况且那时候我还是个婴儿呢
Anyway, so here are some tips.
总之啊 这有一些技巧
These are real tips on how to get a husband.
这些真的是找老公的技巧
So any single ladies out there, these are tips from 1958.
单身女士们注意了 来自1958年的技巧哦
Tip number six says, "Read obituaries to find eligible widowers."
第六条说的是 “要看讣告 找到合格的鳏夫”
What? How is that a tip?
神马？这怎么会是技巧
And you're telling me that you're out-- out of 129 tips, that's the top 10.
你说 在129个技巧中 它排前十
I am so sorry about your loss. Seeing anyone?
请您节哀顺变 有约会对象吗？
Tip number 30 says, "Learn to paint. You set up an easel outside engineering school."
第三十条是 “学会画画 在工程学院门外支起画架”
You know what works better? Not doing that.
知道怎么样效果更好吗？不要这么做
Tip number 40, "Stand in a corner and cry softly.
第四十条 “站在角落里轻声哭泣
Chances are that he'll come over and find out what's wrong."
很可能会有男人过来问你怎么了”
This is what we were telling women in 1958.
都1958年了 我们还在教女性这些烂招式
No wonder we still have a long way to go.
难怪我们任重而道远
But it doesn't tell you what to do once he comes over.
但文章没说男人过来后该怎么办
He's like, what's wrong? Oh, nothing. The magazine told me to do it.
他会问 怎么了？哦 没事 我是照着杂志上说的做的
Tip number 47, "Accidentally have your purse fly open, scattering its contents all over the street."
第四十七条 “不小心把钱包大敞开 让里面的东西撒得满街都是”
It's also on the list of 129 ways to get hit by a bus. That's on that.
这也是129种被车撞的好方法 这是其中一条
Tip number 62, "Don't tell him about your allergies."
第六十二条 “不要告诉他你对某些东西过敏”
No. These are actual tips.
不是 这些是真正的技巧
"Don't tell him about your allergies," because he don't want to deal with a sniffly woman.
“不要告诉他你对某些东西过敏” 因为他不想要爱流鼻涕的女人
Although, if your eyes start to water, you could just stand in the corner, and he'll ask what's wrong. You just--
不过 如果你眼睛出水了 可以顺势站在角落里 他会过来问你怎么了 你就
