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Monica: You don't know everything. Did you know that I'm going out with Rachel tonight instead of you? Hmm?
你并非什么都知道。你知道我今晚要跟瑞秋出去而不是跟你吗？
Monica: And did you know that the only baby around here is you? ! And did you know that I can't even look atyou right now? !
你知道最幼稚的是你吗？你知道我现在都不想看到你吗？
Chandler: Yeah well I did not know that.
那我倒是不知道。
Chandler: This's gonna be ok, right? I mean she's not gonna leave me? This is, this is fixable.
不会有事吧？她不会离开我吧？这是可以解决的。
Ross & Joey: Oh yeah, yeah, sure. Absolutely.
当然，绝对的。
Chandler: By me?
我可以解决？
Ross & Joey: Oh No No.
不可能。
Ross: Well, unless you make some kind of big gesture.
除非你有大动作。
Joey: Yeah, big though!
要非常大。
Joey: Uh-oh, shh! The Mrs.
老婆来了。
Monica: Gunther, can I get a coffee to go.
甘瑟，我要一杯咖啡。外带。
Chandler: Monica.
莫妮卡。
Monica: I'm-I'm still not done not wanting to talk to you.
我还不想跟你说话。
Chandler: Just tell me what I need to do to make things right.
告诉我怎样弥补。
Monica: What? !
什么？
Chandler: Well, that's what we do. You know, I-I mess up and then you tell me how to fix it and then I do and then you know you think I'm all cute again.
我们都这样，我做错事。你教我怎么补救，我补救完，你又觉得我很可爱。
Monica: Really? I'm really tired of being your relationship tutor. You're gonna have to figure this one out for yourself. All right?
我不想再当你的爱情指导了。这次你得自己想，好吗？
Monica: You know what? If you're too afraid to be in a real relationship, then don't be in one.
如果你对真正的关系恐惧，就别陷进去了。
Party Guests: Howard! Howard... Yay!
霍华德、霍华德……
Ross: Phoebe? Phoebe.
菲比？菲比。
Phoebe: Oh, hi Ross!
罗斯！
Ross: What're you doing?
你在干什么？
Phoebe: Oh, I thought this was your party and it turns out it's a party for Howard. He's just the sweetest little man!
我以为这是你的派对，结果是替霍华办的派对！他真是个小可爱！
Guest: See ya Phoebe! Oh and hey, thanks for chipping in!
菲比再见，谢谢你出钱。
Phoebe: Oh, sure!
不客气。
Ross: You chipped in? !
你出了钱？
Phoebe: Yeah, uh-huh, 100 dollars.
对，1百块钱。
Ross: Phoebe! I-I can't believe you gave him money! I thought you agreed it was totally unreasonable that they asked me for that money!
你居然给他们钱！你不是也同意他们要我出钱，是很不合理的？
Phoebe: Yeah, but they didn't ask me! You know? This way I'm just you know, the exotic, generous stranger. That's always fun to be.
对，但他们没有要我出，当性感大方的陌生人最好玩了。
Ross: Yeah, but you're making me look bad!
但你让我很难看！
Phoebe: No I'm not. No! If anything I'm making you look better! They'll see you talking to me and that's- I'm a hit!
谁说的，我是在帮你加分！他们会看见你在跟我说话，我又很红。
Steve: Hey, Pheebs!
菲比！
Phoebe: Hey!
嗨！
Steve: Oh hey, Ross. Umm, see, I-I was thinking maybe you two could switch apartments Cause Phoebe's more our kind of people. Something to think about.
罗斯，你们或许可以交换住处，菲比跟我们比较投缘。你考虑一下。
Phoebe: Yeah, ok, my bad.
好吧，是我不好。
Joey: Hey!
嘿。
Rachel: Hi!
嘿。
Rachel: Wow! You look, you look...big.
哇，你看起来好壮。
Joey: Thanks! I've been working out. Hey, listen, is it obvious that I'm wearing six sweaters?
谢谢，我最近有在练。看得出来我穿六件毛衣吗？
Rachel: Uhhh, yeah. But it's not obvious why.
看得出来，但看不出来为什么。
Joey: Well look, I'm breaking up with Katie. So I had to put on some extra padding.
我要跟凯蒂分手，所以得多加几层护垫。
Joey: You know? I mean, if she hits me when she's happy, can you imagine how hard she's gonna hit me when I tell her I'm taking away the Joey love?
她平常高兴就会打我，现在我要收回乔伊之爱，她岂不是打得更用力？
Rachel: Oh! Oh, right. I forgot that you called it that.
我都忘记你的乔伊之爱了。
Joey: Hey! How're ya.
嗨！怎样。
Rachel: Hey! Hey, cute jacket!
好可爱的外套！
Katie: Oh, oh thanks! That's so sweet!
谢谢，你真好！
Rachel: Oh! Ow!
哦！
Katie: Oh, ow! Did Joey tell you to say that? You guys, are too much!
是乔伊要你叫的吗？你们真是够了！
Rachel: Whoa!
哇！
Rachel: You know what Katie? I gotta tell ya I-I-I-I think you are the one that is too much!
你知道吗？说真的，我觉得你才够了！
Katie: Ohh, Joey has the nicest friends!
乔伊的朋友真棒！
Rachel: Ohh, and the nicest girlfriend!
女朋友更棒！
Katie: You're so sweet!
你真好！
Rachel: Ohh, you're so sweet!
你才好！
Katie: Oww!
啊！
Katie:Joey, she just kicked me.
乔伊，她踢我。
Joey: Huh.
哦。
Katie: Well? Aren't you gonna do something?
你不替我做点什么吗？
Joey: Uhh...
呃……
Katie: You'd better do something, or I'm gonna walk out that door right now! Well? Are you gonna?
你最好替我出头，否则我现在就走人！你要不要？
Joey: Nah.
不要。
Ross: Phoebe?
菲比？
Phoebe: That's what I'm saying.
我就是这个意思。
Ross: Phoebe? Phoebe?
菲比？菲比？
Phoebe: Ooh.
哦。
Ross: This is a disaster! Can't I please just go?
这真是人间地狱！我走了好不好？
Phoebe: No! No! I'm talking you up to people. Just give it a little time, all right? Relax, get something toeat! Ok?
不行，我正在帮你说好话。再等一下下，放轻松，拿东西吃，好吗？
Ross: So uh, what did you tell them about me?
你跟他们说了什么？
Phoebe: Um, oh, I was telling them about you and Emily. You know, try to get some sympathy.
我说了你和艾蜜莉的事，好争取同情心。
Ross: Ohh.
哦。
Phoebe: But somehow you came off as the bad guy.
但讲一讲你成了坏人。
Ross: What? !
什么？
Phoebe: Yeah, I think I told it wrong. You know, we should talk about that Cause I don't totally understand what happened there.
我想我说的方式不对。我们应该先聊聊，我不太知道前因后果。
Ross: Ohh, this cake is really good!
这个蛋糕真好吃！
Phoebe: Oh, ok, see? Things are looking up already!
看吧？情况已经在好转了！
Guest: Oh my God! Someone cut Howard's cake!
天哪，有人切了霍华德的蛋糕！
Guest: Who would do a thing like that?
谁会做这种事？
Steve: 3-B!
3B的住户！
All: Oh yeah, aww!
噢！
Steve: Ok, you got your free food! You ruined everyone's fun! Don't you think it's time you went home? !
你白吃白喝，扫了大家的兴，是不是该回家了？
All: Yeah, get out! Now!
没错，快滚！
Steve: Go back to 3-B, 3-B!
回3B去，3B！
Phoebe: All right, no, every - everyone calm down! Everyone calm down! I have something that I would like tosay!
大家安静一下，我有话要说！
Phoebe: Who here likes Ross? Of course you don't like him! He-he didn't give you any money, he raised his own hand when I asked "Who here likes Ross," and he's wearing two name-tags!
这里有谁喜欢罗斯？你们当然不喜欢他。他不交钱，我问有谁喜欢他，他自己举手，他还贴两个铭牌。
Phoebe: I-I'll be honest with you guys, when I first met Ross I didn't like him at all!
老实说，刚开始我也不喜欢他。
Phoebe:But then once I got to know him I saw that he's really sweet and caring and very generous.
但了解他之后，我就发现他很贴心很大方。
Phoebe: I mean, all I'm saying is don't judge Ross before you get to know him, all right? I mean you know, Ilike all you guys now, but when I first met you you know...
请不要还不了解他就论断他。我现在很喜欢你们，但是刚见面时……
Phoebe: Kurt, I thought, you know, abrasive drunk, umm Lola, mind-numbingly stupid! And ok, you guys Gold digger, cradle robbing perv! So, I think you all know what I mean.
寇特，粗鲁的酒鬼。萝拉，笨得令人傻眼。还有你们，淘金女，老牛吃嫩草的变态。你们懂我的意思吧。
Phoebe: Obviously I didn't think they were gonna start throwing things.
我没想到他们会扔东西。
Phoebe: I just thought if I kept insulting them, you would jump in and defend everyone and then you could look like the hero.
我想说我一直羞辱他们，你就会跳出来帮他们。你就可以变成英雄。
Ross: Oh wow, yeah! See, I did not get that.
对喔！看啊，我没理解。
Chandler: Where's Monica? ! Where is she? I need to talk to her! It's urgent! Is she here?
莫妮卡呢？我有急事找她，她在吗？
Monica: I'm Monica.
我就是莫妮卡。
Chandler: I need to talk to you, it's urgent!
我有急事要找你！
Monica: Ok.
好。
Chandler: Ok, I've been doing a lot of thinking, about us, you know a lot of uhh, us thinking. And uh, wellI guess there's only one-one way to do this.
我想了很多我们的事…… 你和我的事，我猜只有一个办法。
Monica: Wait what-wh-wh-what're you doing? !
你要干什么？
Chandler: Monica...
莫妮卡……
Monica: No-no, don't-don't-don't do it!
拜托不要。
Chandler: Will you marry me?
你愿意嫁给我吗？
Ross: Oh-no. No. No.
不不不。
Joey: What a bad idea!
什么馊主意啊！
Rachel: Ohhhh, I cannot look at it!
我不敢看！
Monica: Chandler, why are you doing this?
钱德，你为什么要这样？
Chandler: I don't know. But I know I'm not afraid, to do this.
我不知道。但是我知道我不怕。
Monica: Chandler.
钱德。
Chandler: I'm doing this because I'm sorry?
因为我很抱歉？
Monica: Do you umm, you really think the best reason to get married is because you're sorry?
你真的觉得结婚的最好理由，是因为你很抱歉？
Chandler: Oh no, the best reason to get married is pregnancy.
不，最好的理由是未婚先孕。
Chandler: Sorry is pretty much fourth you know, behind being ready and actually wanting to get married. Will you be my wife?
“抱歉”大约排第四，在“准备好了”和“真的想结婚”之后。你愿意做我的妻子吗？
Monica: Chandler, umm, I want you to take just a minute and I want you to think about how ridiculous this sounds.
钱德，你先静下来，想想这件事有多荒谬。
Chandler: Yeah, I'm kinda wishing everyone wasn't here right now.
我的确有点希望他们都不在。
Monica: Honey! Do you know that none of that stuff came from me? ! I mean I never said I wanted to have babies and get married right now!
这些事都不是我引出来的，我从来没说现在就想结婚生子！
Chandler: Yeah I know, but I was really confused and then I talked to these guys.
但我真的很乱，后来又跟他们谈过。
Monica: Who? Two divorces and Joey? !
谁？离婚两次的人和乔伊？
Ross: Hey!
嘿！
Joey: She's right you know.
她说得对。
Ross: Yeah, but still, cheap shot!
但这仍是种奚落！
Monica: You know what? You know when I said that I want you to, deal with this relationship stuff all on your own? Well, you're not ready for that.
你知道吗？我不是说了要你自己想该怎么做的吗？你还做不到这一点。
Chandler: I didn't think I was!
我也这么认为
Monica: Oh my God, what would've you done if I said yes?
天哪，要是我答应了呢？
Chandler: Well I would've been happy, because I would've be able to spend the rest of my life with the woman that I love.
那我会很开心，能跟心爱的人共度下半生。
Chandler: Or, you would've seen a Chandler shaped hole in that door.
又或者你会在那扇门上，看到钱德形状的洞。
Joey: Hey Ross, will you pass me that knife?
罗斯，请把刀子给我。
Ross: No, I will not!
我才不要！
Joey: Oh, it's ok. You don't have to be so mean about it.
你不必这么凶吧。
Ross: You're right, I'm sorry. Will you marry me?
你说得对，对不起，嫁给我好吗？
Phoebe: Aw, and I was gonna ask you to marry me because I forgot to say hello to you last week.
我正想向你求婚，因为我上星期忘了跟你打招呼。
Rachel: Oh no wait Pheebs, I think with something like that you just ask them to move in with you. But I'm not sure, Chandler?
不，菲比，那种情况应该只需要同居，但我也不确定，钱德？
Chandler: Ok, how long is this gonna go on.
好，我还要被笑多久？
Monica: Well I think the length of teasing is directly related to how insane you were, so, a long time.
那得看你做的事有多傻，所以……会很久。
Ross: This is fun. Oh-hey Rach, remember that whole "We were on a break thing?" Well, I'm sorry, will you marry me?
真好玩，记得“我们分手了”风波吗？我很抱歉，嫁给我好吗？
Chandler & Joey: That's not funny. That's not funny at all!
不好笑。一点也不好笑。
