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Max, have you seen my phone?
麦克斯，你看见我的手机了吗
I wanna take a picture of this bad tip and put it on Instagram.
我要把这点少得可怜的小费拍下来，然后放到图片分享网。
Getting loose change used to be so depressing, but now I can share it with strangers.
以前收到这么散的零钱会难过，但是现在我可以跟陌生人分享一下。
Let me sum it up. Twitter is stupid.
我来总结一下。推特已经够蠢了
And Instagram is twitter for people who can't read.
而图片分享网，就是给不识字的人看的推特
Where is my phone? I could've sworn I left it right here, next to yours.
我的手机在哪儿？我发誓我把它放在你手机旁边了
Oh, I'll just call it.
我打个电话就知道了
Oh, that's not necessary. I'm sure it'll turn up...
没必要吧。它会自己跑出来的...
My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and there like it's better than yours
老娘的"奶"昔招蜂引蝶一流，随便一比都比姐们你牛。
In my pocket.
在我口袋里
Max, why are you hiding my phone in your apron?
麦克斯，你干嘛把我手机藏在你围裙里
Is that the big question, really? 'cause I think the bigger question is,
这不是重点，好吗？我觉得重点是
Why is your ringtone "my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard"?
你的铃音为什么会是"老娘的"奶"昔招蜂引蝶一流"
If you have to ask that, you clearly have not seen my milkshake.
如果连这你都不知道，那想必你是没看见过我的"奶昔"。
Okay, here. I'm busted. I was checking to see if Martha Stewart called us yet.
好吧，还给你，被你逮到了。我检查玛莎·斯图尔特给我们打电话了没。
You checked it again? You check it, like, every 15 minutes.
你又检查啊？你每15分钟就要看一遍。
I know! I am acting like a little bitch.
是啊，我现在就像个没骨气的妞
Max, Martha Stewart has our business card. She liked our cupcakes. She'll call.
麦克斯，玛莎·斯图尔特有我们的名片。她喜欢我们的小蛋糕，她就会打电话。
Look, in my defense, she asked for our card.
我想说的是，是她先开口要的名片
She got us all hot and bothered. And then what? Nothing.
把我们搞得既兴奋又期待，然后呢？音讯全无。
Martha Stewart is a cake tease.
玛莎·斯图尔特敢说不敢做
How dare you! Martha Stewart is not a cake tease.
你好大的胆子！玛莎·斯图尔特才不是敢说不敢做呢。
Nothing worse than a cake tease. Ask any man.
敢说不敢做的人最差劲了。不信你随便找个男人问问。
Yeah, you shower, you powder your sack. For what?
你兴冲冲沐浴更衣，还给蛋蛋擦香香。不给搞算毛啊？
Look, Max, relax. She'll call. Everything's gonna work out.
麦克斯，别紧张，她会打给我们的。一切都会水到渠成的。
I mean, a year ago, we didn't even have a cupcake business. Look how far we've come.
一年以前，我们连小蛋糕事业都没有。现在进步了这么多，不爽吗
I haven't come at all, thanks to the cake tease.
全怪那个敢说不敢做的人，我一点"爽"感都没有。
Oh, your cupcake is quite tasty. Do you have a card?
你们的小蛋糕真好吃。你们有名片吗？
Max, that's a good Martha Stewart.
麦克斯，你学她可真像
I know, 'cause I can't get her siren voice out of my head.
我知道，因为我忘不掉她蛊惑人的声音。
